I have been with my current bf for a year and a half, and we have a 4 month old little one together. I was the maid of honor in my friends wedding recently. The best man I met right b4 we walked down the aisle and we really got along. During the reception, my bf was basically not wanting anything to do with me, we maybe danced 2 songs together total. He wouldnt even dance with me when "our" song came on. So I danced with the best man, another groomsmen, and some friends the whole time. My bf didnt care, he instigated it half the time.
But I had a good time, the next morning, I woke up wondering if the best man was going to stop over my friends again. I got the butterflies, you know? And I dont think it was just about him, but the attention he gave me that i dont get from my bf.
So now I am starting to wonder if I should really be with my bf. If I can have feelings like that for another guy, what does that say about our relationship? What do I do? Tell my bf? Split with him?
2006-10-10 06:38:02 · 10 answers · asked by sumtimesforever 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I can already tell you what he will say when I tell him I feel neglected.
He will tell me I ask TOO much of him, that he has other things to focus on than me me me. He will tell me that he didnt dance with me bc he was socializing, and that he didnt mind me dancing with other guys bc he isnt a jealous person.
He has told me before if I ever leave or walk out on him, he will never chase me, bc its my choice to leave. Now I understand that point, but doesnt that sound harsh? like he doesnt care?
And yes, we were together for about 4 months when i found out i was already a couple months pregnant. I really love him though, and he does me. I just dont think its enough,but I dont wanna give up too early.
2006-10-10 06:58:58 · update #1
Offer it up as conversation with your boyfriend now. Don't do anything to jeapordize your relationship and give him any fuel to throw on the fire in the future....Let him know how you felt when you were shown that attention and let him know how much of a good time you had....And also let him know you COULD have had that good of a time with his participation, but he refused. Let him know honestly, how you are feeling about things...Either it will really be a wake up call because he's that dense or it won't matter to him so you'll know to just move on. You might just be trying to get over a tiny speedbump in your relationship that you definitely overcome with work on both parts. Relationships aren't always smooth and smelling of roses....I've been married since I was 18, soon to celebrate my 10th year wedding anniversary. It's been a great ride, but alot of work, compromise and understanding. We've had our rough patches, but we've made it through them by communicating and really listening to one another. If you truly love one another you can work through anything....Good luck to you!!
2006-10-10 06:43:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If my math is right you hadn't been with this guy very long before you got pregnant. I think maybe you both moved too fast and it sounds as if you both are starting to regret it. Time for some open communication between the 2 of you. He may be wondering the same things you are.
2006-10-10 13:51:28 · answer #2 · answered by hoosiergal0946 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what's in your heart- it takes two to make a relationship work, I would talk to your man 1st tell him that you feel a little neglected- and see if he is willing to put forth a little more effort- if not then maybe you should move on- people and feelings change- you cant help it! but dont stay just cause you have a kid together- and also keep in mind- weddings do funny things to people, so maybe your just caught up in that momentem-
2006-10-10 13:59:39 · answer #3 · answered by shannon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to tell him about your thoughts about the best man but you should think about leaving him. If you can have these feelings for another man than you don't feel the way you should for your bf.
2006-10-10 13:43:20 · answer #4 · answered by sspinnj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's hard when you just have a little one. tell him how you are feeling and hope fully you can work it out. if he becomes angry or upset, F... him he's lucky you even told him. comunication is very important in a relationship. remember sometimes men feel neglected once a baby is in the picture.
2006-10-10 13:43:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without arguing or bring up the other men, start by telling your boyfriend you're feeling neglected. His response should tell you what to do next.
2006-10-10 13:42:15 · answer #6 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what is best for your child. I'm not sure what that is, it might be staying with this guy, and it might be leaving him, but once you have a kid you can't just be thinking of yourself.
2006-10-10 15:45:40 · answer #7 · answered by rollo_tomassi423 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how u feel, and if he still doesn't care split and go with another guy.
2006-10-10 13:41:32 · answer #8 · answered by Dragon's Heart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your bf is not interesting in you any more and you are also fed wup with him and you are searching new greener pastures which is always good for keeping life going on.
2006-10-10 13:41:58 · answer #9 · answered by ravishr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know girl, GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-10 13:40:33 · answer #10 · answered by supermomma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋