My spouse died 4 months ago. Have you lost a loved one and how long did it take to feel better?

Answer 1

I am soooo sorry for your loss.It takes a long time for the initial shock to wear away.My brother perished in his sleep @ 49 years old.We all thought he was in perfect health.I found him.That was almost 5 years ago but the saddness will last forever.Take care & spend time with people who understand & care.Peace.

Answer 2

I also lost my spouse 4 months ago, and I'm still not over it, and I've come to realize that I'll never be over it. I think the question is how long will it take before you go back to a normal life, even though it will never quite be the same. I try to remember all the good times we had, so I won't feel so sad all of the time. Try to stay active, and surround yourself with family and friends. Its works for me. Best wishes.

Answer 3

One never gets over the loss of a loved one. I lost my son (he was 28 yrs old) back in Feb. of this year . There are still days , that all I can do is cry, These days get fewer and far between a little ea day. There will always be those kinds of days. Then I decided , just what my profile says , "If you hang onto to the past you die a little each day, your spouse as well as my son , would not want us to stop living because they have moved onto a better place. So all I can tell you is , that ea days gets a little easier , you'll begin to have thoughts about him , and those thoughts will bring a smile to your face. All you can do , is one day at a time. God Bless You

Answer 4

I am so sorry for your loss. Neither kind words nor kind jestures will take the lonliness, the emptiness away nor succor your broken heart. Only time . . . . time is the great healer. Time will never take the ache away, but will dull the pain somewhat. A new spouse, in time, will make it possible for you to stop living in the past, but you will never forget your spouse. What happens in the future depends on how happy you and your spouse were together, and how long you were married. But regardless of how it was between the two of you, if you hurt, feel free to hurt for as long and as deeply as necessary. Wallow in the pain, get it all over you, scream and cry, curse God, whatever feelings you need to express - then you can heal, really get healthy. Oh, of course you could just get really, really busy and "pretend" that you have grieved. But you haven't. You need to grieve. You need to read about the stages of grieving, it will help you understand what stage you're in right now. You can't cut the corners. You just have to let it get better, and I promise it will get better . . . over time. Just time my friend. This experience will help you know real happiness. And one bit of advice. When you experience happiness again, live it, eat it up, extend it, share it, pass it on, get it all over you and everyone else!

Answer 5

I'm really sorry to hear that a loved one has died. It is an awful time for you and don't expect things to get better anytime soon. My dad died over 20 years ago and there is not a day that goes by that I still remember him. I hurt for years and years and years without him. For me...I would probably say it took 10 years to feel like I don't need him in my life to have a life. I know that probably doesn't make sense, but ever since my dad's death my whole family has fallen apart. Not only are my brother and sister both drug addicts, my mom just isn't right either.

Anyway, sorry to probably make you feel worse, but I know for me...life will never be the same without him.

Answer 6

Give yourself a full year before making any other big life changes, such as selling a house or anything like that.

Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, and make some time to be alone. Imperceptibly, somewhere around a year or eighteen months, one day you will actually feel like looking people in the eyes or make a meal or something that you have no impulse to do right now.

Grief is a process and even after you feel better, you will have bad days, but that is normal.

You have my condolences.

Answer 7

i'm very sorry. when i was 16, my 14 yr old sister died of an asthma attack. it's been about 3 years and sometimes i am okay but then i burst into tears. honor his memory and know that God planned this for you to make you stronger. the hardest part is thinking you'll never see the person again but you will.
if you don't believe in God, just surround yourself with friends and family and try to move on b/c your life is precious and worth living and you deserve to be happy again.
you may also want to buy a pet so you're never alone. you don't need to get a dog or cat but perhaps getting a loving guinea pig or rabbit from the humane society will help you b/c offering your love to an animal in need is a healing process. (but don't get an animal unless you can give it a forever home) good luck.

Answer 8

I can't imagine how long it would take when you lose a spouse. When my Mom died (at a young age) it took at least 6 months where I felt fairly liveable but I still get sad regularly and its been a year and a half. I know everyone says it but time will make it a little easier to live with.
My heart goes out to you.

Answer 9

my dad died almost 10 years ago- my mother has tried moving on, but every once in awhile she tears up when talking about him- I am sorry for your loss- I think the hurt never goes away- it only numbs inside- but you can put forth effort to share your heart with someone else- It wont be the same, but it will help take your mind off of him, so it doesn't hurt so much. You could also join a support group, I know that Really helped my mom.

Answer 10

Well My Dad died 6 years ago but i lost my first child five months later that year; Acceptance on the matter made us get over it a bit easier, giving God all your grievances will ease your pain slowly but surely and will get you the feeling presence of your loveones deep inside, it's like they just took a vacation or two..... my sympaties goes with you.... looosing a love one is not a joke!