We've been married for almost 3 yrs and we have an 18 month old daughter 2gether. He has been abusive to me, and he has cheated on me I'm constantly catching him in a lie. I'm know that I'm not perfect but I have been the best that I can be to him considering the circumstances. I am tired as hell and I am ready to move on and don't want to keep him away from his child. He has gotten so selfish to the point where he can have his female friends but I can barely talk to my friends (females) w/o him having something to say. Through out all of what he has put me thru, I've never disrespected him or cheated on him! I'm in the process of moving and I have to tell him something soon.
2006-10-10 05:11:07 · 16 answers · asked by Dee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
heck go to the police and getan Order of Protection : Kicker - this is where you kick his sorry booty outta the house and you make him relocate.
That would get your message across very clear cuz the police will give him 5 minutes ot get his personnal stuff and get out !
BTW Ole Whoppies Daisy you forgot to add ... and he was better then you to that commnet ! LOL
Look him the the eye and say smell ya BYE !
2006-10-10 05:16:41 · answer #1 · answered by Glenn T 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to tell him that you're sick of his disrespect. You're tired of putting so much into a relationship and getting nothing in return. That you're tired of the lies and cheating... you've tried so hard and you're tired of trying because nothing is working. Then you say, I am done with you completely. I don't plan on keeping our daughter away from you, we can work on some type of arrangement for custody, but us together, isn't happening anymore. I'm over you and I can't be in this marriage, it is only causing me to deteriorate. I need to be in a better place. I don't want our daughter to become witness to your infidelity and abuse. And then you leave without looking back.
2006-10-10 05:16:55 · answer #2 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he's been abusive to you, getting out the situation is the best thing. No use in being with someone you can't trust. You deserve better. Heard of that saying: "Action speaks louder than words"? Telling him your leaving may spark an arguement; he may not want you to leave (it's a control thing). Do what you have to do to get out of there. Do it for your daughter. Do it for yourself. Seek help if you need to. Be strong and know that you deserve better. You'll never be happy if you stick around and only hope things get better. Besides, if he's already put his hands on you - it'll only get worse. You deserve respect; not get walked on like your a rug on the floor. Plus, you daughter will only get older and children don't need to witness things like that. You'll be doing more harm than good sticking around. "For the sake of keeping the family together" --- I've heard that a thousand times. I even tried that but it's not worth it honey. I am my children's mother (and father) and they're doing fine. Children imitate what they see and hear. I don't want my son to think that drinking, smoking, hitting women and messing around is the "thing to do" when he get's older. As for my own daughter, treatment like that from any man -- is bad news. I know I deserve better and so long as she sees that, she'll know that she will too. You don't want your daughter to suffer the same thing as you did. Set that example girl. Be strong and press on. In the long run, you won't regret it. I promise you. Next time that loser puts his hands on you, call the police. As for you not wanting to keep him from his child, can we say "Supervised Visits"? Good luck to you and I will pray for you.
2006-10-10 05:30:52 · answer #3 · answered by apache_lizz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you feel you could be in any kind of danger by telling him, don't.
Move out while he is at work or something, leave a note behind. Do not put yourself or child in danger. If you don't feel you will be in danger then tell him but make sure someone is around just encase he flips.
Good luck to you.
2006-10-10 05:19:14 · answer #4 · answered by Andrea T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just tell him upfront, look the man does not care about you that's why he did what he did, not including kids involve here what are you waiting for? just leave and take care of your self and raise you kid right. get the police involve for your safety if you have to but hon you need to worry about your self and our daughter.there will be some man out there who can takes good care of you not only him exist in this world, explore the world out there so you'll have some experience to teach you kid down the road. good luck and look up dont feel bad, it is what it is, there's things in life you can't explain but that's life. be strong
2006-10-10 09:38:56 · answer #5 · answered by kevin n 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you even consider allowing him to continue influencing your daughter? How is letting your daughter maintain contact with an abusive father better than not letting him see her?
Reconsider.
2006-10-10 05:24:17 · answer #6 · answered by lunatic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be straight up honest. He needs to know that you are leaving because he is sleeping around, hurting you, and just no longer deserves you around. He isnt going to care anyhow if he is having other relationships. Time for you to move on and find someone who treats you right.
2006-10-10 05:27:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't even bother to tell him. Just move out and let your lawyer or a restraining order do the talking...
2006-10-10 05:31:58 · answer #8 · answered by nonyahbusiness 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell him you are leaving. Tell him you want to work on the problems in your marriage to make it a better marriage.
If he refuses, tell him he has given you grounds for divorce by being unfaithful continually and that you don't have to hang around, waiting for him to bring home a disease to you.
2006-10-10 05:17:31 · answer #9 · answered by delmaanna67 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
The best way to tell him is with a summons and protective order.
2006-10-10 05:13:49 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋