What causes some to have a stronger identity then others??

Question

i have been told that i have a strong identity by a friend of mine, i told him..i guess so,but i just know what i want in my life and who i am- it's no big deal!!
(:
just curious of why some people have a stronger self-identity then others? it's not like i am superconfident about everything all the time,it's just that i have strong preferences and i know my pecking order in the big sceme of things,in other words- i know who i am and i am perfectly fine with myself,imperfections,flaw s and all- the good just ain't as good without the ugly i always say.

Answer 1

Some people are confident in themselves by nature, while other in-born personality types are naturally self-doubting.

Some people naturally also find their definition in their relationships with other people or their social roles, while different people are very very independent by nature.

Depending on the environment in which one grows up and whether one was oppressed, abused, devalued, or not invested in, a person who would have been "normal" can come to doubt themselves and their thinking.

(For example, kids in addiction-ridden homes often learn to not trust their perceptions -- partly because they want to pretend things are good, and partly because their addicted parents are always doing weird/destructive things and then saying, "No, it's all in your imagination, I don't actually have a problem.")

Then again, a DIFFERENT kid in the same house might become VERY self-assertive in order to defend/protect himself.

Again, to me, it all comes down to natural temperament -- our basic natural preferences which then are modified by our interaction with our environment.

It's a good thing to have a clear sense of self and preferences, and it should take you far in life.

We all have stuff to work on. Some people have to spend many years building their identities, whereas people who are strong in their preferences instead usually just work on how to give other people room to have their own preferences and being careful to not over-assert themselves.

Answer 2

I guess you have given a very good answer to your own enquiry.