My boyfriend of 4 years has just broken up with me he says he doesnt know what he wants and lately hes been thinking about seeing other girls and never wants to cheat on me so the best thing is being apart, The thing is we both went travelling last year and since hes been back he hasnt been himself and didnt get the job he wanted so really doesnt know wat he wants from life he says he loves me more than anything just doesnt know if hes in love with me and thinks i deserve better than that i just think that this is a huge mistake but theres no going back and the pain hurts like hell i really dont know wheather to just leave my country and go somewhere else? please help
2006-10-10 01:01:33 · 11 answers · asked by ABBY W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I understand that your situation right now is really difficult and you feel comfused. I am sure you are thinking "how can he stay away from me when he says he still loves me?". Leaving your country is not the solution. Just think that you don't have to leave your home, family and friends behind you just because you broke up with your boyfriend. Try to be patient, leave him alone to think without pushing him. If he really loves you he will come back to you. Maybe he needs time to think. Four years of relationship, most of the times , are frightening for men. But, if you see that he is happy away from you having a good time with other girls, then when he told you to break up propably he meant that he wants to be free and he doesn't worth your love. Give some time to both of you and you will see.
2006-10-10 01:57:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
“in love” : A temporary state of love. Can last up to 1 ½ years, but usually shorter. It is based on thirst of love, a constant need to be satisfied, but never is. Someone “in love” can never get enough and wants to be near the one they are in love with 24/7. It is a clouded state of mind.
As they say, “love is blind” the person “in love” will make decisions to please the one they are in love with even if it hurts them. At the time they do not even realize they are doing so. Only after the “in love” period is gone do they see what they have done. They do this due to the fear of losing the person and fearing losing the feelings they get while being with this person.
looks like 4 years has run it's course... he is looking because he is not sure the 2 of you will be enough for him..
You said it well, You deserve better... And you are worth it.. take this opportunity to find YOU again and explore the life you deserve.
2006-10-10 08:08:06 · answer #2 · answered by Life Coach 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, at least he was honest.about seeing others and not cheating on you, but he sounds really confused and disappointed about the way his life is going right now, and it seems it stems from not getting the job he wanted. It's okay, step out of the way, give him his space and if you two are meant to be together--you will be, but work on yourself, and use the time to be the best woman that you can be, then when and if he grows up, YOU will decide if it's what YOU want.
2006-10-10 08:22:42 · answer #3 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. It's got to be the worst pain ever. Know that time will actually make this better....though it probably doesn't seem like it now. You could make a list of all of the good things that being single now offers you and what you didn't like about him..when you are ready. Cry when you need to and write your thoughts down. I'm so sorrry
2006-10-10 08:11:45 · answer #4 · answered by a b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry to hear that someone did this to you... four years is a long time, and you can never get back the time he spent with you.
well, one thing that always worked for me, when i wanted a guy back and he wasn't so sure about me, is that i tried my best not to care... i know its really easier said than done... but remember there are many many ppl out there who will want your company... and more importantly your love... and trust me, your old guy willl see you with a new guy, and then you will have your choice...
dont' ever do something b/c a guy broke your heart... in my opinion, if you want to leave the country for a time, just for healing sake, do it,... and invite a good guy friend... and if you dont have a good guy friend... make one..
don't leave just b/c of this jerkish guy... leave for yourself, if you must
2006-10-10 08:10:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok I am sorry, He doesn't love you enough and never will. Your not the One. Move on. Easier said than done but after 4 years you need to get it. He is not into you that much.
2006-10-10 08:06:22 · answer #6 · answered by Patrick G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something happened on that trip, I suggest that you think back and maybe you will remember something that changed him. Do yourself a favor and move on, it will be tough but you want someone that loves you and is very much in love with you! GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-10 08:17:33 · answer #7 · answered by Eyes of Green 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say give him time...but dont wait for him....maybe after he travelled he realized some things... but thats life...i would go out and date other guys (not like promiscuously) but just 2 see who else is out there...
2006-10-10 08:11:52 · answer #8 · answered by Yasi D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about him making up his mind, concentrate on making up your mind. What does he have to offer that you think you cannot live without?
2006-10-10 08:19:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he lost interest in you......the mere fact that he said.....he don't know what he wants....and been thinking of seeing another girl......no if or but, forget about him!!!....move on.......
2006-10-10 08:10:10 · answer #10 · answered by Adele 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋