why are some bisexuals rude towards other bisexuals?

Question

I have seen some bisexuals be rude towards other bisexuals.Pretty much to them if you're currently not with a girl then you're not bisexual female.At least I've talked to someone who thinks that way.Is it because some people just act bi for their guys and because of bi curious people that these people question other bisexual's sexuality?

Is it that hard to tell the real bisexuals from the fake ones ?To result in being rude.I can understand if someone only does it to get attention but if they're bi curious or bisexual. Why be rude to the ones who genuinely find both genders attractive?Plus it's not reasonable to think you're only bi if you're dating ur own gender currently.

Not all openly bi women get shunned etc by lesbians,gays and straight people.Depends on where you live from what I'm told.

Answer 1

I would say Insecurity. People are attached to their labels as a kind of ego thing. So when you are not displaying perfect traits of a bisexual (or whatever), they pounce on you to project their own insecurities and negative feelings about being bisexual onto you to make themselves feel better.


A lot of bisexuals feel anxiety about their sexuality because they are given a hard time both from the straight world and also from gays in the gay world too. Gays are given a hard time by straights but also by bisexuals too- they are sometimes pressed by bisexuals to prove that they "don't go both ways" (especially if they're liked by the bisexual in question!). [i'm gay.] SO with all that negative energy floating around hitting them, some probably feel a little insecure about their sexuality and so have to "prove" it and probably feel that every other good "bisexual" person should have to "prove" their sexuality too.

It's universal human nature to try to justify things that you believe but can't support, to deny things that work for you but don't work for others, and project your negative feelings onto something else so that you don't have to acknowledge feeing them yourself.

Answer 2

Well, dearie. First it's people's misconceptions about our lifestyle..part jeliousy and mostly stupidity. Anyone who says "If you aren't dateing your own gender then you aren't bisexual" seems to be highly misinformed. After all if we only dated the same sex that would make us gay wouldnt it? Now there is nothing wrong with being bi-curious, after all if we had never been "bi-curious" and had sex with our first women we wouldnt ever know how wonderful it is! It is no one's place to question your sexuality, you are sexual in just the way that you are ment to be, weither that is explored or not is something else entirelly. But, on the otherhand there are those "Im only bisexual when I am drunk" types, and they just seems like they dont have enough balls to be outright about their sexuality, prehaps a talk with a counsouler is in order. and beware the girls who only want to date you when they are in a relationship with a manm beacuse just maybe the man might be pushing this and she isnt comfortable with it, or she may just think it's being "kinky" and not intend to be with your for the long hall, weither that is what you planned or not! Just keep your head about you, never let anyone tell you who or what you are beacuse you are just the way you need to be, God(dess) says so!
Bless you sweet thing, and good luck!

Answer 3

I remember when I was first coming out (I've been 50/50 bi all my life, and out as such all my adult life), there were some "bisexual" women who seemed to be acting for the guys, trying to look extra-sexy and trendy. I really resented it, and I think I got after a few women who maybe didn't deserve it.

We're all tagged with those "trying to be trendy" or "confused" or "slutty" labels, by both gays and straights. We're all told we're lying. So to see people who we think are the reasons for such labels...well, that can provoke the rudeness. I'm not saying it's right. I'm saying that's where I came from and some other lifelong bisexuals still come from.

We need to be more secure in ourselves. We need to speak for ourselves more. We need the gays and straights who love us to speak up for us. And we need to be welcoming to other bi-dentified people, *all* of them.

National Coming Out Day's tomorrow; I hope non-flaky bisexuals take that opportunity to speak for themselves rather than run others down.

Answer 4

I Imagine it is because they are sick of those "lipstick lesbian" types of bi-folk, who aren't genuinely attracted to same sex but suggest that they are in order to excite their menfolk.

I certainly dislike labelling people and don't care about a person's sexuality. I'll either like them and their attitude, personality, etc. or I won't. I'm not so desirous of (although I understand why) bisexuals who insist that a 1:1 relationship should be all that there ever is - be it straight or gay. Equally I'm not so fond of bisexuals who casually engage in sex with either gender, separately or together, as though sex were all that they considered defined them and their bisexuality.

I count as one of those bi-folk, somewhere in between.

Answer 5

Some people in the community are probably just tired of how trendy it's become for straight women to pretend to be bisexual. People get tired of being used by straight women and get overly-defensive.

Answer 6

I think it is because of the posers. If they have not seen you with another girl that is what they think you may be. In most situations they should be able to tell if you are being sincere about your sexuality--but perhaps not just in casual conversations. And it really is the posers that cause the problem.

Answer 7

Same reason heteros can be rude to other heteros, I doubt it is because of their sexual orientation...being rude is just the character of a whole lot of people, some of which happen to be bi.

Answer 8

maybe it's some sort of defense mechanism for them.
i wouldn't know for sure coz i'm not bi.
i'm a lesbian, full & whole.
but there just might be a good reason for this.
i mean, bis wouldn't go out and search for ridicule towards themselves without a reasonable explanation.
at least, that's what i'd like to think.

Answer 9

Some people are just rude. Gay Straight Bi whatever it doesn't matter some people just don't have any manners anymore

Answer 10

Because a lot of girls play foolish child-like games with sexuality, and people get tired of it and start being rude.