I have had a boyfriend that has cheated on me some months ago. I don't know what come over me, I went out with one guy and had a bit of fun. This was back in June(in the beginning of the month). I didn't think anything of it as i was in love with my boyfriend. Later that same month i went with another guy. (This was at the end of june,2nd some fun). My Boyfriend found out as he has had it done to him before. i.e.Girls cheating on him.
I was asked by my boyfriend why i did it. I replied with it was payback. He would not accept that reason or excuse as he called it. I said he wasn't around at the time . He was working as a tow truck driver and i didn't know when i would see him.
Times have changed. So to speak the tables have turned. My boyfriend could not understand why i did it to him. He even said he thought i was different to other girls and that i was only for him.
I do not know if you people fully understand the situation i have tried to explain to give a bigger picture.
2006-10-09 15:45:40 · 9 answers · asked by Lorrs S D 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I wish to add that i had said to my boyfriend that the first time he cheated on me i said it is going to take me a while to trust you fully again after what he did to me. I have had it recripocated by my boyfriendsaying that he will take a while to trust me again.
I can understand why he said it. After all i know full well that i should not have done this to my boyfriend. He knows that i love him very much.
I know that i am in the wrong totally. The guys i went with were off msn that i have known for a while as friends. I believe that i am being vindictative.
I appreciate the feed back from you all. I need to understand i cannot fight fire with fire or eventually i will get burnt. this saying is so true.
I know most of you are trying to help me with this situation. I don't mind if you are up front and tell me like it is and how it's meant to be. I will handle it in my own time.
Thank you all for your responses.
2006-10-09 16:10:50 · update #1
Personally I think you made the mistake by going on those other dates, two wrongs don't make a right and getting back at someone you love is just spiteful. Well anyways you did you bf wrong by not having self control and waiting on him and you did those other two guys wrong bc they seem like they were "misery" dates..do you get my flow...anyways, I think that if you love your bf and he cheated on you once and you accepted him back then you are the bigger person (you can forgive but forgetting is kinda hard) now if he cheats on you again and you accept him back then shame on you, there's a saying "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me". Now I hope I got the story straight...oh and another thing, every situation is different, another persons relationship may be totally diff from your and only you know your feelings so only you can decide whether or not to take back the one that cheated on you..hope this is helpful one way or another.
2006-10-09 15:54:09 · answer #1 · answered by beauty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure I fully get the situation, but it sounds like you were getting back at him, whether you were conscious of it at the time.
Would I do it? No. But then I wouldn't bring myself down to that level by cheating as payback. To me, when one person cheats, it's over. I know that's harsh, but I think that if someone goes that far, they don't really want to be in the relationship, or they don't deserve to be.
2006-10-09 22:50:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
two wrongs don't make a right, seems like you just can't seem to get over it. Now the both of you have to try to build up trust for each other and that is going to be even harder. Stop playing games or it just won't work, I don't think your in love with your boyfriend either to do something like that. grow up.
2006-10-09 22:56:11 · answer #3 · answered by lisa b 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So basically he can do cheat on you but you can't cheat on him ... doesn't quite sound fair ... but then again if he's a cheater he'll never quit, he'll always be a cheater ... but what you did wasn't right either ... I think now that the trust is gone your relationship is doomed ... don't let him guilt you into thinking something that wasn't true .. if you were truly the one for him he wouldn't of cheated to start with.
2006-10-09 22:51:02 · answer #4 · answered by emnari 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you saying you went out and had meaningless sex with people you didn't care about to "get back" at someone? Um.. ok. I don't see why you didn't just break up with your boyfriend and not discuss your sexual adventures with him. Sounds silly to keep sleeping with men as a "payback" when you could be finding someone who really cares about you.
2006-10-09 22:49:39 · answer #5 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldnt fight fire with fire, just because your b/f cheated it dosent mean you should just get revenge, i believe that once married a couple have a fully safe relationship, only having sex with each other, BUT once one of them go with someone else it brakes the safe enviroment, they could catch anything & bring it back to there partner, SO if your partner cheats get rid,
2006-10-09 22:53:52 · answer #6 · answered by KATIEKAT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its the classic scenario guys can dish it out but cannot handle it , they cannot handle the fact that their girl friend is messing with some one else. or seeing someone else. they wanna cheat and expect us to take them back , but when we do it, its so wrong, girlfriend don;t even worry about it.
2006-10-09 22:50:18 · answer #7 · answered by Teaza19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two wrongs don't make a right.
2006-10-09 22:50:19 · answer #8 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummm let me think....DEF NOT. I HAVE HIGHER STANDARDS, THAN TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO IS GONNA CHEAT ON ME
2006-10-09 23:32:43 · answer #9 · answered by katie_00006 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋