My hubby is going on to a open relationship.Im trying to make my mind abt it.I need ideas from ppl who know?

Question

we are maried for 10 years... hes teling me to keep this only to us..so no 1 will know..and this is to spice things up..ihave asked ques abt him leting me flirt with others.....i need to talk with ppl who had experiences...plz contact me on yahoo....id-litafedricks

Answer 1

I know that the traditional idea of marriage is "one partner for the rest of your life". I haven't been married quite as long as you...but you and your husband aren't the only ones wondering if the traditional idea is realistic. Even though I know this advice isn't going to be popular...I think it may help.

If you're feeling uneasy about him being with another woman, why not go to a strip club with him. Watch another woman give him a lap dance...preferably with someone that looks like you. Watch the way her body moves on him and then look at his face. If you are turned on by this....then maybe try going to strip clubs a few more times just to make sure before you open up your bedroom. If you're repulsed...then an open marriage is going to mean divorce.

Only you and your hubby can decide if this is going to work for you. Best of luck!

Answer 2

Personally, I would just try to work on your relationship. Obviously your hubby thinks there is something missing. His eyes are probably busy seeking other women and he isn't getting what he wants from you sexually. I would never "open" the relationship with my wife because I absolutely love her and do not ever want anyone else to have her. I have to work at not looking at other women b/c I know how I am wired. Men are very visual and we like things to be "our way" we like the way our women move and talk and things so you should find out what he really likes and desires in the bedroom. Your man sounds like he really is selfish and you should seriously talk to him about how you might make things better in the bedroom and that you don't want to share him. No relationship will ever be good if you are in it with many partners. You may as well just be having sex with whoever and not be married. I really think you should consider what God says of marriage. God made us and he says that we are supposed to be "one" You and your hubby are one... see? I would encourage you to understand that God made sex and he wired man's brain. I would suggest getting into what your husband likes but if he is abusive or does things you don't think are okay then just explain to him why it's not cool and draw some lines where you think they should be drawn. If he cannot respect that then I would seriously pray about it. I don't want to sound weird here but I am serious. When you were married, it was sacred and God was the main reason. Consider your relationship with God and his. The only way you will truly fix problems in your relationship is to find out what God would have you do. The Bible says for a woman not to hold out "sexually" on her man and for a man not to hold out on his woman. It also says that they should honor one another by staying true and so that they will not be tempted to be with others. A lot of people think God's ideas are wacked but I tell you that it is the only thing that will really fix your problem. Men are selfish pigs and without God, we are selfish, self centered sex crazing mad and will never stay true in a marriage when it gets tough. So there that is my answer. I will pray for you and I hope you consider all that I have said. From a mans point of view. God bless, I hope your love life improves. I could give you a book idea. It is called "Saving your Marriage before it Starts" I suggest you seek some counseling too @ a church even. This isn't that abnormal, your situation, but I promise it will end bad if you go down the "open" road; nomatter what he says. God Bless You Both! HelpingHelper

Answer 3

I personally think that is a very,very bad idea. I tell you why. I am in the process of going through a divorce. (after 28 yrs.) Many times in that relationship my husband thought this was ideal thing to do. It was as along as it was hlim doing it and starting it but when I trlied it all he-- broke loose. It caused my relationship a lot of heartaches. You are mature enough to make your own decesion as to what you think is right. If you are uncomfortable with this than DON' T DO IT.

Answer 4

How can a relationship last this way? Do you really want to share your husband? Do you want to spread yourself between other men? Do you want to introduce STDs into your marriage? Do you want to part ways with your husband because you or him found someone that pleases you better than your spouse? Think hard before you allow this "open relationship" to ruin the relationship that you have now.

Answer 5

Good luck. I would kiss my husband good bye if he decided that he wanted an open relationship. I don't share my men. What good is it going to do your marriage? You can find enough things to spice up your relationship without breaking your vows.

Answer 6

Try role playing, then maybe YOU, and only YOU can be the something different he is looking for. That way you won't have to share him or yourself, and it might spice things up as well.

Answer 7

I personally would not do it only because my man is mine and I don't share him. Also Ive seen a few relationships fall apart because of "open relationships" good luck

Answer 8

A marraige is between ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN, according to the BIBLE. if there going to be this open marriage why get married in the first place. .

Answer 9

How about a romantic vacation it dose not need to be expensive to be different and exciting you are headed for heart ace and disappointment sorry

Answer 10

Inconceivable!