My ex is filing for a modification of our custody order. He wants full custody. I am wondering if it is better that I continue working or quit my job and stay home? I just recently started working about a month ago. I am married so I was able to stay home. Now I work 4 days a week 11 hours per day. I am wondering what is going to look better to the courts? Staying home with my children. Or working? my husband makes a fair living, we have a beautiful home on several acres of land in a terrific neighborhood. My girls attend a great school. What is your take on this?
2006-10-09 13:48:43 · 12 answers · asked by lilmisstickletoo 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Being away from the home 11 hours each day is a bit much but how much of that time is spent working while your children are at home or in the care of a sitter. If it does not exceed 2-3 hours each day then there is no reason to quit your job.
Your ex will have to prove that it is in the best interest of the children to win a custody change. It is not as easy as it sounds.
Perhaps you should talk with your employer and try to reduce your hours at least temporarily.
Try not to stress too much. I don't believe you have much to worry about. BTW I work for the family court regarding custody and child support so I do have some basis for my answer.
Best of luck to you!
2006-10-09 13:57:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say go ahead and work. But maybe you can find a job with less hours. Work while there in school then you'll have the evenings to spend with them. The courts usually favors the mother anyways. My husband works all the time to support 3 children (one thats not even his) the mother is worthless and has no job, won't even get a job and sends the children to daycare and does everything thats wrong for the children and the judge still favors the mother. But since your only working 4 days a week then you have at least 3 days to spend time with your girls. I don't see them just giving him full custody just b/c you have a job. Good luck.
2006-10-09 14:01:20 · answer #2 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been divorced for 10 years with sole custody.. Was working providing for my 2 kids, and once in awhile getting child support (hardly anything) then the ex got his act togeter is living in another state..My kids are 14 and 13 years old they went this summer to visit.. and they decided they wanted to live their.. Due to the fact he makes more money.. I lost custody... I also got laid off my job after 7 years.. So my interest is in the childrens needs they want to live with their father fine.. But one day they are here the next they are their.. They went for vacation.. and are not coming back.. So yes work. Don't do what I am doing wallowing in sorrow.. Be the bigger person.. hope this helped
2006-10-09 16:26:46 · answer #3 · answered by coping/ letting go 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IMO, I doubt the Court will make a change to the custody order unless there's been a substantial change in circumstances that warrants the modification, and it has to be in the best interests of the children. it doesn't look like your circumstances warrant giving the father full custody and it looks like it is in the best interests of your girls if they were to stay with you, but then again, there isn't enough details in your question...about your current husband, etc....LOOK UP FAMILY LAWYERS IN THE PHONE BOOK AND CALL A LAWYER!
2006-10-09 13:57:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you are trying to improve your chancees on looking better in the courts it would be best to research and find out what your ex's argument is for wanting full custody. Unless it is an extreme circumstrance (the other person is on drugs, emotionally disables, etc) the courts probably won't give him complete and full custody. Do you know what your ex is going to say in the courts? Find out and work your argument against his. Good luck!
~ Violet Wisdom ~
2006-10-09 13:54:19 · answer #5 · answered by Violet Wisdom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Courts generally favor the mother in custody battal, especially when the kids are girls. You need to work as child support will not be able to sustain you and your girls. It is the responsible thing to do anyways.
2006-10-09 13:51:38 · answer #6 · answered by Social_D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To Work. It is important to do what is best for the children. Not what court will think and what ex will think. Let God take care of the other things and He will if you let Him. There is no guarantee that you will get anything out of the courts.
2006-10-09 14:03:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
IM KINDA IFFY ON THIS
work so that you can pay the expensive lawyers
but also you dont want to because you dont want him to say
you dont spend time with the girls
why dont you take a temporary leave /absence/or vacation time off
2006-10-09 13:51:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its up to you whats more important in your life money or time with children. courts wont care. ask your husband what he thinks and then give him a good b.j. cause they make the world a better place.
2006-10-09 14:08:44 · answer #9 · answered by crank 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
pull out a calculater and add this up;
if you had custody, add your GAINS and then subtract your EXPENSES
vs.
if you only had to PAY child support
then;
the time with your kids;
getting to work
if this doesnt make sense to you then why ask strangers on-line for advice?
2006-10-09 14:57:07 · answer #10 · answered by Ralph 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋