reading many other girls lives about there men beating on them inspired me to write and ask for help. im originally from the uk but my boyfriend wanted to get married in las vegas.we came to las vegas and got married but loved it so we stayed for a month. im only 20 and my husband is 31.weve been together for 4 years. i didint want to get married but was pressured in to it. he told me i was moving with him to las vegas for a trial and if i didint like it we could move back. its been 2 years here and he wont let me go home. his family are very powerful people and have alot of money. i now havw two kids by him which were not planned i was on the pill at the time but love them none the less. he beats me to the point i cant move and at the minute have 2 black eyes, a swolen lip.he has broke my ribs and put me in hospital many times,im not in contact with my parents and they hated me when i moved away from them. i have no friends , no family and know he wil kill me. ive left him many time
2006-10-09 10:45:19 · 19 answers · asked by annleech06 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
but he has tracked me down and makes things impsossible for me to leave.he dosent hit the kids but how can i leave him. he locks me in the house when he goes to work, i have no money, he unables the phone line when he goes out. im a prisoner. when i told his parents about it his mum said all men hit there wives and that its not unnormal.her husband hits her and my father in law told me not to think about leaving his son . he would make it impossible and if i evr did he would make sure noone hired me for a job and no home evr took me in, he also said he would make sure the kids were taken off me. what can i do please. lifes got that bad ive slit my wrists in the past and can cope
2006-10-09 10:49:44 · update #1
YOU need to get a backbone, get the two kids in some vehicle with you, and CHECK INTO one of the MANY Domestic Violence Shelters in the Las Vegas Area if you are SERIOUS about fearing for your life and want to LEAVE this relationship.
Once in the Domestic Violence Shelter, they will help you with the other problems -- as long as you are HONEST and TRUTHFUL About your condition and the problems with this abuser.
2006-10-09 10:53:44 · answer #1 · answered by sglmom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you have left many times, you obviously have gone back many times. YOU need to decide for sure that you are leaving. When he is not around do a little planning and then have him arrested. Set it up so you and your children have a safe place to go, or ask the police to help you with that. Also, you would be surprised at what your parents would do to help you in an emergent situation. Do not subject yourself to this anymore!!! Put a protection order against him from seeing the kids also. In the event that you ever do have to meet him to exchange the children, RIGHT FROM THE START, be sure that your exchanges are supervised by law enforcement. Don't let his families money intimidate you. You can get custody if you have a decent record. You need to show that you are acting in the best interest of the kids by removing them from the home.
2006-10-09 10:54:15 · answer #2 · answered by Amy C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
S*hit that is totally f*ucked. I understand your situation a little coz i was kinda in the same situation. But not as bad. There have been many cases like this in the middle east but this happening in a western world has some hope.
If his family is that powerful there wont be any point of going to the cops.
Try to contact your family. You are a UK citizen, your parents can go to the embassy and ask for help. Tell them to be persistent.
Write to big powerful people like Oprah. This may seem fruitless but you will never know if you never try. Once the public knows about your problem your husband and his stupid family won't dare to do anything to you coz the jury will know what the situation is already.
As for your children, you have to be a free person first. Then you can fight for your children.
Also learn self-defence. Make yourself physically fit.
And this is the most powerful. Pray. You have to believe God will deliver you from Satan and his clutches.
I want to help you. Please contact me and tell me how to contact you. Mail me at my yahoo add.
2006-10-12 02:43:48 · answer #3 · answered by Liz^24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry to hear about your very abusive marriage. What you married is a bully. You need to get to a battered women's shelter immediately. Ask the social worker at the hospital if she can help you. Go to the local police station and swear out a warrent against the bully and get a restraining order to keep him away from you. Even if his family is powerful with a lot of money, it is still a crime to beat your wife. Look in the blue pages of your phone book to get the toll free number for battered women help. When you leave him, don't go back. Get pictures of your eyes and bruises, also, get a copy of your medical records so you will proof of his cruelty and violence towards you. Contact your family tell them of your situation. Let them know you and your children want to come home. Maybe they will help you since they didn't want you with the bully in the first place. Also, think about your children. It won't be long before he starts beating and bullying them. Don't be afraid to ask for help. It's better to be alive begging for help than dead in silence. I hope you get the help you need soon. I'll be praying for you and your children.
2006-10-09 11:35:30 · answer #4 · answered by merry59 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They have places you can go for shelter that will help out abused wives. You need to call a homeless shelter and get information on how you can get away from your abusive husband. They know all about those things. Get out and make sure you stay away from him. Next time he hits you call the police and start taking action. You just staying with him is only hurting yourself. He needs help he was raised that way (not that,that is a good excuse. Move out and move away save your children from getting older and repeating the same thing. Love yourself!!!!
2006-10-09 11:37:32 · answer #5 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you must get help ,if you are locked in your house shout from a window for the police and child services,you have to do something quickly.you have a computer and are able to write ,send an sos ,contact your family or friends in the u.k.let yor family know the true situtation ,dont leave anything out.there a laws to keep your husband away from you.be strong.do this when he is at work and dont let him know what you are planning .i feel so bad that this is happening to you.but please take my advise and good luck.from mikhal in israel.p.sif you land up again in hospital ,tell them everything.he will not be able to do anything about it,as you will be protected.
2006-10-09 11:05:48 · answer #6 · answered by mikhal k 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all men hit their wives. Men SHOULD NOT hit their wives. You are being mistreated by a Grade-A Jerk. If you're in danger, call the cops. Try going back to your parents, APOLOGIZE HUMBLY. Say you made a huge mistake, you're a big idiot, whatever, and you need them. If they have any human decency, they'll take you back.
But I also sympathize with the guy who didn't believe your story, since you're locked IN a house, without a phone, but WITH internet...
2006-10-09 11:03:14 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to the police. In your present condition, they would honor a restraining order against him.......and remove him fro your home.
Contact your parents that you wish to come back home, I'm sure they will assit you as well. If you're unable to stay in your own home, then go to a shelter with your children. Press charges against him, so that he goes to jail. And get out of vegas!
2006-10-09 11:20:24 · answer #8 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are both from the uk can't u get him shipped back there? it sounds to me you came on vaca and stayed. oh how i love illegal immigrants (i know its not the point) anyway empty the bank acct. stay at a hotel and file for divorce. don't forget go to the cops and get a restraining order.there are shelters you can stay in that will help you.
he disables the phone lines but you have access to the computer? i've never heard of such a thing. also how does one lock someone in a house? are u pad locked in a closet that happens to have a computer? sure, whatever...get a life. there are women who are really in danger, thanks for wasting people's time. hope you enjoyed the attention.
2006-10-09 10:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by and now you know 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Get a lawyer, take pictures, run whatever you have to do get away from him!!! Next time a black eye is n't going to be all he does!!! If you fear for your life get an e.p.o. IF he breaks it, they will lock him up. YOu can also include his parents on that too, Check into it when you can escape and contact your family somehow. They can help!!!
2006-10-09 10:58:15 · answer #10 · answered by lady_lucktyree 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋