a question ladies only please.?

Question

How do you like your man?
I had a discussion with one of my female friends yesterday. I which I stated that most women like their man to be nice when need be, but nasty when can be: a man that will treat you nice but that can also tell you what he wants, talk dirty to you, get you to please him bedwise(giving you the same pleasure in return of course) She disagreed which has left me wondering. What do you ladies prefer. a goodie two shoes doormat kind of man, a nice/nasty combination or a straight out bad man. please motivate your answers.

Answer 1

You are definitely right with your description of the nice/nasty combination. Lets face it - who wants to be treated like dirt all the time - therefore a Mr nasty wouldnt last long. On the other hand a Mr nice guy would be just that - too nice and who wants a doormat all the time. So its the nice nasty mix - the art is knowing just when to be nasty and how far to push it and being nice without being too soft. Took me a long time to find the perfect mix and now I'm hanging on to him.

Answer 2

I would say a combo would be nice. It is nice to once in a while let him take control of things, but I'd like to do the same sometimes to. If I can't have a combo, I'd go with a nice only kind of guy. I never could stand a bad boy. Jerks are jerks no matter what.

Answer 3

Being a nice, decent, person is not equal to being a doormat. People who have a certain level of intelligence are able to manage being nice without being a doormat - man or woman. Being a good and kind person who respects other people and himself doesn't make a man a "good-two-shoes".

Many women would dump you as soon as look at you the minute you started with "dirty talk".

Women generally don't want "nasty" - ever. This is just a sign of emotional immaturity or mental instability or lack of self-control or respect for the other person; and so "nasty" is always a giant warning sign to dump the guy.

If the above are signs of mental instability or personality disorders or immaturity, then its even more so for the "straight out bad man/loser".

Men and women are humans. There is a set of good qualities that applies for all humans. Some of those qualities are:

Being kind (not just to your girlfriend or boyfriend but to everyone, including animals)

Having self-respect and respecting others

Being emotionally strong in the face of life's difficulties (which is not the same as being a brut in a relationship or being "kind of like a brut"). Emotional strength is what it takes to be supportive of someone else who is going through something awful and it is what people need to get through the bad times in their own lives.

Being emotionally well adjusted and in good mental health
Being honest.
Being fair and decent to other people.
Being clean.
Having a sense-of-humor and being able to see the humor in life.
Being sensible and able to make good decisions that are based
on good reasoning.
Being someone who doesn't have difficulty getting along with
other people or making and keeping friends.
Having a certain level of intelligence.
Having a certain level of manners and dignity.
Being someone who can have a decent conversation.
Having some version of ambition when it comes to
plans to build one's own future

The above are just some of the positive characteristics of both men and women. For the most part, well adjusted women want those things in a man. There may be some immature or poorly adjusted women who want twisted stuff, but that's not the majority.

If you can get it into your mind that women and men are all humans, and that most well adjusted humans look for other well adjusted humans you will have some idea of what women look for.

I don't know if you are a teenager who hasn't had the benefit of a good father or mother who talk to you about being a human and seeing women as humans, or if you're someone who comes from an area where the people are not very educated, or if you're some very misguided individual; but I can tell you that your friend who disagreed with you would probably back up what I've said above (of course, I can't be certain; but if she wouldn't back me up there is a whole world of women who would).

Finally, other than the positive personality/emotional characteristics that show how "solid" someone is, women (and particularly young women) also look for someone they find physically attractive. That could be blond hair, black hair, or a muscle-bound look or a trim look or even a heavy-ish look. This is an individual preference from woman to woman; so in a nutshell, what women want is someone they find attractive (and sometimes a guy who knows how to make the most of his appearance and is very clean is more likely to be found attractive than some bleached-haired, jewelry-wearing, try-too-hard) who has the positive human attributes I listed above.

With all due respect, and with every intention to offer you sound information, you seem to be a very misguided individual; and you would benefit from getting some kind of guidance from people who can give you legitimate information about women. I respect that you made the effort to try to get some feedback about beliefs on here. If nothing else, just try to forget who is a woman and who is a man and apply the "rules of being a human" to both genders.

Answer 4

A man who knows and loves God, if this is in place all of the rest will be there automatically. The nice nasty combination, one who is self assured and knows who he is. Confident in his manhood enough to be gentle and caring and not afraid to show emotion. Honesty is a very important value. A man who knows I am a queen and treats me as such, knowing that obviously if I am a queen he is the king. God Bless

Answer 5

I couldn't agree more with Azalea. Being considerate, kind and respectful of other people's needs does not equal doormat. My man would never say a rude word in my presence (I don't think he would ever say a rude word at all), in fact, I am the one using them. He respects my views, my moods, my feelings and my femininity. He knows that if he ever says a dirty word - that would be the last word he says to me. The guys I met before him tried. That's why they are not around anymore. And some of them also tried to be nasty and domineering but you know what? If you have any self-respect, you wouldn't tolerate people telling you what to do especially when it comes to bed. If they want somebody to please them - let them go and pay somebody for it. I'm not there to please guys, for me it's about sharing yourself with a person who appreciates how much they get and who gives you the same in return. My man likes a bit of rough from time to time but he only gets it when I'm in the same mood. And most of my female friends would prefer a man who respects them.

Answer 6

I have the combination of good guy and bad boy. He balances me completely, I am nice and when I get walked on, he is there to kick a** or push my way through.
He works really hard for our family, he loves me WELL, in bed and out. He is becoming a better listener over time, and knows what I like and dislike.
He is fun most of the time ... And open to things I want to do. He makes me happy, he makes me smile.
At one time he was the all out bad boy, but out grew it when he met me.. He really does balance me and I him. We usually both know what the other needs before even asked ... ♥

Answer 7

There is nothing sexier than a man in control and can tell you what he wants but knows what buttons to press for tenderness. Unfortunately they are few and far between and not enough to go round. I wouldn't say I liked nasty because that can be really damaging but dominating definately.

Answer 8

I like bad boy that is also caring and protective so I would say a nice/nasty combination

Answer 9

I prefer a man who has a sense of humor. Someone I can laugh with, be a friend with.

Screw the nasty/nice stuff - been there, done that - and it gets OLD REAL QUICK.

Answer 10

i call it a "nice guy with an edge" - you called it a nice/nasty combination - that's what i like - a nice guy, but has a life and mind of his own - keeps me on my toes, but of course would never think of cheating - good sense of humor important also - and has to be a man of his word (trustworthy) - confident - doesn't need to be with me 24/7, but checks in with me to let me know what's going on - passion is important also - passionate about life, what he likes - am i asking for too much??