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how to really feel what you feel, see the truth, but constructively recover, without feeling desparate, hurt, and pain

2006-10-09 10:01:23 · 13 answers · asked by Just curious 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

13 answers

focus on the Positives. always... rememer no matter what u 've been thru, what mistakes u've made, u can USE it to make you Better for tomorrow!!! think of it this way.... u are one step ahead someone who is oblivious, who has never experienced anything... now u have the chance to start over, w/ the knowledge from ur past, to do Better than before, to change your behavior, to seek New things. always focus on the Positive, Healthy and Happy things in ur life, so that u can filter out the NEgatives. the stronger u are, the more likely u can "bounce back" from the bad.

my advice, simply put, would be to work on the Obvious so u can heal the Less Obvious..that means, work on your Appearance: how u look makes a BIG deal on how u feel about yourself, ur confidence. work out, exercise, find flattering clothes, hairstyle, makeup. next, work on your Mind: study harder, read more, read the news, develop your thinking, find hobbies, excel at them. after that, work on your Relationships: w/ family, friends, and then strangers! the better u look and the more u know, the easier it will be for u to meet new people...all throughout this, FOCUS on the POSITIVE! :)

u'll start realizing ur life is FULL of things, and u don't have time to be sad or lonely anymore....good luck, and keep seeking what is Positive and Healthy.... u will be much better off than if u were lost w/ nowhere to turn to.. the more u take care of the obvious things, the less u have to worry about them. u can spend ur time on more important things~ good luck.

2006-10-09 10:10:06 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0 0

IMO, you can't do one without the other. It's all part of being human but the desparate portion ~ you can skip. From experience, I lost the chance to have a long term friend my life mate (or so I think). I went through everthing you listed included depression for a while and after I went through all of it (there is no chronologically time frame) I still hurt when I think of what could have been, but you can't allow yourself to use it as a crutch to not move forward and keep the lesson but lose the pain.

2006-10-09 10:08:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

it depends on what you're feeling disappointment about, but realize that throughout life things will not always go the way you would like. What doesn't kill you will make you stronger, and it does. Hopefully smarter too. Nothing could be that bad. It's all part of growing up. It could be worse. Tomorrow is another day. You just have to pick yourself up, brush yourself off and start all over again. Perhaps someday, the dream that you wish will come true.

2006-10-09 10:08:22 · answer #3 · answered by grrandram 7 · 0 0

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2016-10-19 02:34:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

There is a book out there called HOW TO CHOOSE HAPPINESS.

I can't recall the author but it's really about how our thoughts control our attitude. I'm not saying you have to be happy at this point in your life but it will help you counter balance the negative that is probably going on at the moment.

I had a marriage fall apart five years ago and I was equally responsible for the demise. I felt like doggy-doo every day for a couple months. I found the book and since I don't have a strong "faith", it really helped me.

If you're lucky you can turn to god or whomever. For me, i had to use my own bootstraps so to speak.

If you focus on day by day something positive it will help you.

2006-10-09 10:05:02 · answer #5 · answered by Maureen V 2 · 0 0

Sit with the pain. Don't judge it. Just be with it. How does it feel? Observe it, as if it is happening to someone else.

When you slip, every time you cry you get over it a little more.

Recite your story again and again until you can get it into 10 words or less, including how it makes you feel. Then say it again using only nonsense words, as in "Bla booey bleu hooey suey."

2006-10-09 10:12:24 · answer #6 · answered by slippped 7 · 0 0

I never knew what everybody meant by endless,
hopeless bleak despair
Until one day when I found out
The first time I ever left my house
It saw me and followed me home
And stayed with me for my whole life

For years and years I wandered the earth
Condemned to a life of bleak despair
Then one day I looked around and found
It had disappeared

Hopeless bleak despair
It was always there
And then one day it disappeared
In a puff of smoke
In an unceremonious way
One day it disappeared

All I had ever wanted in my life was only to be
free of it
It drove away my family
It made me lose my job
Whenever anybody saw it
They'd say get out of here

For years and years I wandered the earth
Sick of my life, looking forward to death
The one day I looked around and found
It had disappeared

Hopeless bleak despair
It was always there
And then one day it disappeared
In a puff of smoke
In an unceremonious way
One day it disappeared

For years and years I wandered the earth
Until I died and went to hell but my
Despair had ascended to heaven
That's how I finally got rid of it

2006-10-09 10:07:58 · answer #7 · answered by RED 2 · 0 0

face it evryday even through the tougest of times and you will be eventually immuned.
Let the time heal everything. Let it be another lesson of life and move on.
Life goes on as long as u go on with it.

2006-10-09 10:06:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anne H 3 · 0 0

Only you can tell, your question has no simple answer that some unnamed person over the internet can solve.

2006-10-09 10:03:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i wish i knew and could help u.... my only recommendation is going to church. also, take a car ride by urself and us the time to think and clear ur head.

2006-10-09 10:05:57 · answer #10 · answered by megcheeker 1 · 0 0

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