They talk at least twice a day, and says he considers her a close friend. They talk about our relationship as well as her and her new husbands. And has told her that I'm jealous of how close they are. My bf says that I have insecurities. But he has also told me how he thought she was so beautiful, and how when she got her boob job, she came over and showed him right before we got together.
2006-10-09 09:01:54 · 9 answers · asked by gretyl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
having children together ties you together for the rest of your life. It does not necessarily mean that anything is going on, but the facts are the facts, they have a history and now so do you and your guy. The problem to me sounds like a boundary issue. He should not talk about your relationship with her and vice-versa. It just gives them the room to reminisce about their own realtionship, things like "well I remember when you did that and..." He should also respect your wishes about the boundarues that you would like to have set up. And you should respect the fact that they are still "friends", but let it be known to him that the "relationship" that you have is different than the one that he has with her. Their relationship, since they opted out of it, should focus on the child they share and not on them as individuals. Your relationship should focus on your role in his life and what it might mean someday if you become the "step-parent". I think it is always good that parents get along, and admire them doing so. But when you have moved on in seperate directions it is really unfair to involve the "new" with the "old" it makes for alot of friction between the two and maybe even jealousy. I would talk to him and try to figure out exactly what role you play in his life versus, what role she plays as the mother of his child, and draw boundaries between the two, and go from there. Good Luck.....it's a long hard role to play. Message me if you want to chat.
2006-10-09 09:12:31 · answer #1 · answered by cutipi_1977 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I would be jealous too but how you handle this feeling can make all the difference in the world. Does he talk to you about how you two are doing? Does he consider her his best friend or you? As far as the boob job thing, I don't think any woman needs to show my man her boobs regardless that they have a kid together or not. But because it happened before you two got together you can't complain about something that happened before you were in the picture. As far as him not introducing you to her, yes I would be concerned. I would ask him why? I would certainly question why they seem to be so close and they aren't together anymore. If he is going to have you in his life you should be first, well that is right after his kids. That is if he loves you and sees you two with a future. There are alot of things I would be asking him. It does sounds a little fishy to me. He should be talking to you about everything and not her regardless of who she is to him. You should find out everything first not her. Honey, you need to fix that problem and now before it gets worse. Hope that helps, good luck!!!
2006-10-09 09:11:57 · answer #2 · answered by Redneck Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think of you're incorrect in any respect. i could experience an analogous way. She has no appropriate to ask your son to pay for an condominium that he's no longer staying at particularly while yet another guy is together with her. She additionally has no appropriate to the motor vehicle. It sounds to me like she has no appreciate on your son or your loved ones. i could have not any aspects of helping her disrespect my son. She is greeeeedy and egocentric. Your son is extra suitable off now and solid that it befell formerly they have been given married or she prolly could get the motor vehicle. i does not meet together with her and her new boyfriend.
2016-10-16 00:27:23 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you shouldn't be worried. She married and has moved on with her life and so has he. They HAVE to have communication they do have a kid together (if i read the question right). I have saw my bf's little girls mom, but I haven't personally been introduced. They also talk on the phone all the time, they talk about me and him to. I think it's just a way for them to show each other that their not hurting maybe.
He has already seen ALL of her, what's her new "job" going to hurt if you weren't with him at the time.
Don't worry about little things like that. You'll make yourself old.
2006-10-09 09:07:06 · answer #4 · answered by angel2005_2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your boyfriend of 2 years- need to back off the mom, if he expects to have a good thing with you- out of respect for your relationship, he needs to not be so close to her- Be friendly yess, maybe even friends- they have kids- but showing boobs, and talking about life problems? Not cool- you should be his best friend not her.
Good luck- DONT let him walk all over you
2006-10-09 09:06:14 · answer #5 · answered by shannon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are better as friends than they were as a married couple. However, if he doesn't let you meet her, then there's something beyond what he's telling you. Most likely, he still has feelings for her, but is just keeping a "healthy" distance. Allowing this to continue without intervening can lead to disastrous consequences. Don't take it as you being insecure, just take it as you being careful/cautious. =-]
2006-10-09 09:26:20 · answer #6 · answered by BigDanInTX 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who? Your boyfriend made a baby out of wedlock with another girl, and he thinks she's wonderful, and you've never met her? Meanwhile, he's gossiping about your feelings with her, and sharing intimate details about your relationship and she's dishing about her marriage with him? Ummm...if they're so close and loving, why didn't they get married?
I don't think I'd want to be with a man who was still so emotionally wrapped up with another woman, no matter who she was or is.
I'd find a fresh man, not recycle some other woman's lover.
2006-10-09 09:08:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would keep a close eye on this situation... If he intends to have any sort of future with you then he needs to accept that you will have to meet his kid's mom. Ask him what he's hiding.... because it sounds like something.
2006-10-09 09:05:21 · answer #8 · answered by Killer Nandin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him. If you doubt him at all, get out. I'm almost certain that from what you've told me, he's cheating on you with her, and she with him on her husband. You have a right to meet anyone who he talks to about you.
2006-10-09 09:04:45 · answer #9 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋