2006-10-09 06:10:26 · 23 answers · asked by roopa_asu2004 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
If people stop respecting you just because you're divorced, perhaps they're not the kind of people you should worry about whether or not they respect you.
Go and find some people who really matter, not those that judge for reasons when they don't know the full background.
2006-10-09 06:19:39 · answer #1 · answered by SL 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What is a divorce? In my view it is merely a rectification of a mistake. You obviously went for the divorce because you and your ex-husband thought both would be happier apart than together. I presume you are happier without him.
In India, despite the so called "social progress" we have made, divorce is still looked upon as taboo. The knot cannot be untied. This is unfortunate as it condemns people for life for their mistakes. But we must change. And that change can only be brought about by daring individuals who defy conventions, and take bold positive steps in pursuit of happiness. I respect you for that.
As to "respect" from your other acquaintances, your body language, tone of voice, or maybe even the actual words you use (albeit quite unconciously) when you mention your marital status might be sending out negative signals, which invite others to "look down" on you. These things reflect your own personal view of divorce -- maybe you yourself were brought up to consider divorce as a bad thing. Maybe your parents and other family members are not accepting the divorce, and consider it as a stain on the "family name". All this can cause mental anguish. Let's accept that. But if you let this anguish consume you, you'll probably find yourself even more miserable than you were when married, which defeats the whole purpose of seeking happiness by rectifying your past error.
My advice to you is : Have a little patience. Don't get unduly agitated. Time is the best healer. People will eventually come round to accepting you for what you are. At present they are probably shunning you because they want to appear "high brow" and disapproving to OTHERS to keep their own egos and relative positions intact. Given time, they too will realise that you have chosen the path to happiness, and it's probably the best for you. And so long as you do not give them any reason to criticise your conduct in life, I am sure you will regain their friendship. Don't go out of your way to convince or persuade them. It will only make matters worse. People just love being "bitchy". Let them be.
Life is long. You live your own life, and try and make the best of it.
Stay away from serious relationships with other men for the time being, or you can get branded. And that will really hurt.
Chin up. God bless.
2006-10-09 21:24:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think SL has given the best comments.ur marital status is ur own personal affair. u must have gone through real agony to reach this stage. a divorcee requires sympathy and i admire u for ur stand. dont respect those who dont respect u. show ur contempt for them and iam sure ur own nature will turn them around too.
2006-10-10 01:18:16 · answer #3 · answered by ravi c 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In the US there is ~ 50% chance of every marriage ending in divorce. There are a million new divorces (therefore 2 million newly divorced people) every year!
(with respect for another human being in the world, divorced or not)
;-)
2006-10-09 13:23:25 · answer #4 · answered by WikiJo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if they are a girl, they could be jeaolous and if they are a guy, they could be scared that they would end up liking you and becoming the same way, you just gotta stop giving out too much of your information until you know them better. Me on the other hand, I admire you because I like that you wre able to go through a divorce and you are back on your feet and willing to talk about it!!
2006-10-09 13:16:45 · answer #5 · answered by Olly 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hi, Don't worry about that Just be strong & move along. It's a free world You just live your life the way U want. Who cares about others anyway.
2006-10-12 10:19:45 · answer #6 · answered by Mona S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would assume that you did something to cause the divorce or people wouldn't stop respecting you. If people just automatically do it when they hear you are divorced, then I would take a minute and see what type of people they are. If it bothers you that much, tell them you aren't married and leave it at that.
2006-10-09 13:14:04 · answer #7 · answered by ~mj~ 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You should not be too much worried about what every otehr person thinks about you. When you have got divorced, there should be a valid reason for that. So you only be worried about people who are very close to you and who understand you. It should concern you only these people stop approaching you.
2006-10-10 01:46:37 · answer #8 · answered by SGraja 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
People usually assume it is "your" fault. You b+++h!!!!! Don't let it bother you. Get along with your "new" life. I've been divorced for almost 8 years. I am a male,,,,and I have enjoyed every minute of it. It's great to be single. I have a live-in girlfreind, and it is great. Enjoy Life. Screw what other people think.
2006-10-09 13:16:01 · answer #9 · answered by bugear001 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
in my opinion you are going back (want to achieve the false respect from the society which does not have any reason)which you have achieved in your life by fighting with society..i do not know the reason of divorce.society give respect to those who are like them.most of the people from society want to earn more and more money for their comfort,name,fame,beauty .so they give respect to those who has all these. it hardly matters for them how they have achieved, what kind of person he is . what are his moral values. what he has given to the newer generation.also they do not like the person of divorcvee BECAUSE THEY DO NOT HAVE ABILITY TO TAKE THAT DECISION EVEN THOUGH THEY KNOW THAT IT IS RIGHT TO DIVORCE SO THEY DO NOT LIKE THOSE WHO HAVE TAKEN THAT DECISION IT IS HUMAN NATURE. nothing matter for society. even sometimes tendulkar like person also suffered from the same. a person like tendulkar can be seen from disrespectful eyes than anything is possible from society.
forget about society. but you have to prove that you have divorced for a cause and the cause is valid.you have finished a evil. so that if the younger generation is having the same problem they can take this decision without any fear. if suppose you were living like slave under your husband than divorce is the right decision. it is your ability to be self dependent ,to fight with social pressure ,and to live your life what you think because God has sent to live you not to become slave under someone.
so finally i want to say you should prove one day that you are right people will automatically start respecting you . they will say yes divorce is the right decision in that situation.
do not think that it is not necessary to prove . because you are the part of society and you have to give some inspiration to society you can kill the evils of society in the same way as Sita( wife of Rama) proved because she was the part of society.
2006-10-10 02:40:26 · answer #10 · answered by KrishanRam(Jitendra k) 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋