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They spend 2 weeks a month at fathers, this is 2nd year in a row they forgot. Father forgets their birthdays when they are with mom and stepdad. Mom and stepdad have always made big deals out of every birthday. Mom's feelings very hurt. Should we just blow it off? Should we purposely forget their birthday next time? Kids seem to be mad at us and try to place blame elsewhere.

2006-10-09 04:04:18 · 26 answers · asked by TK 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

26 answers

It depends on whether or not anybody values the feelings of this mother. None of that other stuff you mentioned matters. If they value her feelings they will make it right whether they personally think its a big deal or not. If they don't value her feelings than the family's problems are well beyond a birthday.

You could put it to them this way, we are either recognizing birthdays in this family or we're not. You guys decide. You want us to remember your birthday then you remember ours, your old enough to do this now. If you don't want to be bothered with it then fine but lets just be clear, no more exchanging gifts on birthdays.

Don't do something passive aggressive or hide your intentions. That never does anything but cause more trouble in the family.

2006-10-09 04:06:58 · answer #1 · answered by tenaciousd 6 · 0 0

Sounds complicated, but the easy and best answer is to forgive and forget. Each day is a new day and unless you want to relive the past, leave it there! Sharing someones birthday is a compassionate way to show you care. A simple card or phone call is enough. Tell them that you love them (assuming you do) and if you forgot, apologize. Life goes on. It is more enjoyable when you pay attention.

2006-10-09 04:13:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

It's only a big deal if it bothers you. It would be nice that they would remember no matter where they are at with at least a phone call or just a card. There are a lot of things that they can do that's not too expensive like take you out to dinner or fix something for you at home. Or at least celebrate it before they leave or when they come back. There is no excuse for forgetting, they are at age where they can remember things that they want to remember.

2006-10-09 04:08:27 · answer #3 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0 0

maybe it's time mom forgets their birthdays for a change. I think a couple of them should do it. She should go so far as to spend the money, she would have spent on her kids, on herself.

Then when they want to know why she can say "It's no big deal"

2006-10-09 08:13:32 · answer #4 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0 0

Before mom's birthday gets here, the step father needs to take the kids shopping for gifts for her since he remembers her b-day and the kids don't. They take after their father on that one and intervention needs to be taken so they remember. Then celebrate away when the day gets here. What the father does or doesn't do on the kid's b-day is entirely up to him. Mom and step dad should not follow in dad's footsteps and pretend to have amnesia when it comes to the kid's b-day. They're much wiser than that, hey?

2006-10-09 04:13:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Yes it is a big deal.
4getting Mums birthday is the ultimate sacrilege!
Make her breakfast in bed, do the chores, make a card ( it ain't difficult ) & B good 2 UR mum 4 the rest of the year.
Ban
answering back.
leaving UR stinking trainers in the way.
Arguing with mum.
It ain't worth it.
Mums R always right!

2006-10-09 04:09:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

it is not OK to forget someones birthday especially your moms...no you should not purposely forget their birthday that is teaching them revenge way wrong...I would talk to them and tell them that their mom is hurt because they forgot her birthday and help them plan something nice for her like a dinner or even a night out with mom to make up for forgetting..being away from someone is no reason to forget their birthday if you love that person.

2006-10-09 04:23:03 · answer #7 · answered by manita 2 · 0 0

Have a family meeting and discuss hurt feelings. If that doesnt work, just forget everyboyd's birthday from now on until everyone is serious to discuss the birthday issue.

2006-10-09 04:07:19 · answer #8 · answered by Maya 3 · 0 0

interior the U. S. women human beings have been devalued to considered one of those point that a woman's nipple (any woman's) is seen as pornographic/unholy. i hit upon that to be culturally and morally reprehensible. That, plus the reality that I observed a US 'cop chase' television show the place a actual existence guy with a psychological incapacity replaced into shot lifeless interior the line for waving a tiny penknife approximately on the advancing police. they have their values f*cked up, I inform you.

2016-10-16 00:11:59 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I'm 17.... no, they should not have forgotten her birthday, and if you "blow it off" it will probably be worse. Plan something extra special for her, put more into it then you would on a regular birthday, and try to make up for it.

This is a BIIIG deal for mom's.

2006-10-09 05:36:23 · answer #10 · answered by xboxgirl 3 · 0 0

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