2006-10-09 03:51:51 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if they love you then they should behave on your day, regardless of how they feel about each other. surely out of their love for you they can put old fueds aside for one day and if they cant then they shouldnt be there. oh and congratulations!
2006-10-09 03:55:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, a wedding should be all about the bride and the groom, not the families and big fancy ceremonies and dinner. I had the big wedding my first marriage and was unsure the day of the wedding as to wheter or not I was doing the right thing. I should have walked out but the pressure of it all made me go on with it. The marriage was over in less than a year. I have been remarried for over 10 years and our wedding was on the beach in Cancun and it was just my wife and I (and of course the minister and witnesses). It was more genuine and felt so right. So dont let families get in the way of what is the most important day of your life, you do what you think is right.
2006-10-09 03:57:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Been there, done that. What you do is this; Send them an invite and include a little letter to say how very much you and your husband to be would dearly love for them to share in what should be a happy, memorable day. Whilst you are aware that there may be tensions within the family groups you know that, it being your wedding day, no one person or persons would wish to be blamed for your day being less than perfect so you will both understand totally if any of your guests feel theymay not be able to attend your wedding for fear of being at the centre of any unsavoury events. You and your fiance must, as you're sure they'll understand ,have to put themselves and their other guests first, so any inappropriate behaviour will not be appreciated. You would truly love to see them at your wedding but if they cannot promise to keep any antagonisms for another time, then you feel you must ask them to consider perhaps not accepting the invitation to attend. If you don't believe they can do this, then be absolutely selfish and do not invite them. It's YOUR day, noone should spoil it-it's about you and your partner=not about airing dirty laundry in public. Stick to your guns and stick together, after all you don't have to set eyes on them ever again if you don't want to... it'll be you and your beloved...NOONE ELSE!! Good luck !! xo
2006-10-11 12:03:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is your day. You should in no way be stressed out at your own wedding. If your families can't understand and respect that, you might want to consider eloping. In actuality this "special memorable" day is for you and him. I would hate for you two to look back on your wedding day with dread and anger. The family being there is a gift from you and your man. It only take five people to have a wedding. The bride, groom, minister and two witnesses. Think about what is best for you and your husband to be. Good luck and Congrats!!
2006-10-09 04:27:58 · answer #4 · answered by mzbrwnskin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can have one. I'd have a small wedding with the friends and family that are supportive. If they want to know why they're not invited, tell them that they can't be trusted to leave their issues at home and not ruin your happy day. If they love you, they'll get a grip. Otherwise, leave them out of your plans.
Weddings are stressful because people expect you to do certain things and follow certain protocol. Forget that! It's all about you and your husband, everything else comes second to that.
2006-10-09 04:02:56 · answer #5 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ooohhh!!
Do I know what you are talking about!!
I've been in a similar situation before! ( Not a wedding - but a really important birthday )
To tell you the truth - I don't think you can do anything. And I don't think you should care much
( sounds harsh I know),
but at the end of the day its YOUR day!
Leave them to it - be calm and ignore it. If you don't make a big deal out of it - they won't either.
Focuss on you and your partner, and the rest will follow. Usually these things work out ok.
Don't worry about it!
Enjoy your wedding!! I wish you the best for your future!
2006-10-09 04:08:47 · answer #6 · answered by shirley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is not going to be easy because as far as they concern niether of you are good for each other.Have you tried talking to your family and he talk to his and if you two feel like all else fail then maybe go to city hall to get married so that you two can have some peice of mind and you both are happy this is your day don't be unhappy bcause they are they may never get along so try not to force the issue a lot.
2006-10-09 03:58:43 · answer #7 · answered by keishahayes2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hope for your sake of it being your special day, they would put their problems behind them and be adults about the situation. You can not choose your family but that does not mean that you need to like them or make them get along. Maybe that is for the best anyhow. Try to keep an open mind and take it day by day. Hopefully it will not be too stressful for you and things go smoothly. If someone starts something. Make sure you show them the door right away and express to them that they are rude and they need to grow up and he adults!! I wish you the best of luck!!
2006-10-09 03:56:11 · answer #8 · answered by Niecy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I totally agree with all the above.
But if that still doesn't work, i would make myself cry and tell them all that they are selfish not to put their differences aside for just one day, YOUR day, and that now none of them can come to the wedding as they have put you through so much stress and worry you can't cope so it is better if you get married without any of them there, that should shock em and put their priorities into prospective!
If not then they have serious issues not to see how much it is stressing you out! and they have too much pride
2006-10-09 04:05:21 · answer #9 · answered by Lolly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it doesnt look like u can have a nice family wedding little centipede...not unless you have 100 hands to create double work by having split up sides of the reception hall etc...my dream was to get married on a yacht and tell no one... i ended up getting married with only 4 people at the ceremony, ideal! (but not on a yacht...oh well, maybe i'll hire a yacht once the divorce is finalized, and celebrate? u can bring your mad families to my party and i'll get them all drunk and then no one will be grumpy wif anyone else?)
2006-10-09 04:06:03 · answer #10 · answered by Wisdom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your wedding, take control. Don't ask them, tell them there is to be no fighting and acting like fools and ruining your special day. If they cannot agree to this, inform them they will miss out on the wedding and have no one to blame but themselves. And if they keep this up, they are going to miss out on alot more of your life as you refuse to get involved in their fights. They're the adults and need to set the example and act like one. Suggest they do that.
2006-10-09 04:05:47 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋