Ok--my husband and I are going to celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary next week...I have already told him that I would like a nice romantic evening with just the two of us. I have already made arrangments for the kids and everything. (in our 18 years, we have probably celebrated our anniversary 2-3 times as our son was born on our first anniversary and we also put him first) My husband knows how much this means to me...anyway...he was talking to some friends of his and decided that all of us are going out this weekend and party...he wants to go to a titty bar and have fun and get drunk...he knows I don't drink, nor do I feel comfortable going to places like that...Would you be upset?? I feel like I really don't matter much to him. This was supposed to be a special weekend for us.. I have talked to him about it and he just says I need to loosen up and live a little. What do you all think?
2006-10-09 03:12:08 · 22 answers · asked by confused 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i am with you
go ahead for a quiet evening with hubby
let son enjoy his way
don't forget his b'day card & a few roses for him in the morning
a nice lunch at home or evening get together should be fine
tell son straight, that u need a private dinner with hubby
>> congrats on u'r anniv. & wishin many more to come !
2006-10-09 03:18:46 · answer #1 · answered by sεαη 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, it appears that there is a breach in communication between you two, which is surprising for an 18 years marriage. If he knows that this is a very special day for you and still wants to do something trivial, like see a pair of some strange **** and get hammered, then you're right, he's not demonstrating that he cares about how you feel.
I don't think there is anything wrong with getting drunk or going to a titty bar, but you can do that anytime.
Looking at it from his point of view, maybe he feels he's cognizant of what you want and that does do a lot of things for you and now is an opportunity where he wants to do what he wants.
Again, in my opinion, it appears that there is a gap in communication and you're not on the same page.
2006-10-09 03:19:32 · answer #2 · answered by Altruist 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he's being very selfish and owes you an apology and a nice night out together, just the 2 of you. Maybe he has something planned for the 2 of you and it's going to be a surprise?Of course, you know him and his personality. If he does indeed take you out with friends to a strip club, I'd tell him he still owes you an anniversary night out. This made me sad when I read it because I've been married just 21/2 yrs and financially have not been able to do much to celebrate our anniversary. I felt bad about it but we had a nice romantic dinner at home together. My wife has been so understanding...I can't wait to be able to maybe take her somewhere for our 3rd. You deserve a special night for putting up with him for 18 yrs. He needs to grow up and get a grip. Don't make yourself go somewhere that you are not comfortable. He's acting like a kid not a man.
2006-10-09 03:33:18 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. It does seem as if all that matters to him is him. I would be really hurt if my husband did that on what was supposed to be a romantic weekend for the two of you.
What does loosening up have to do with anything. Just because your not comfortable in a titty bar, why are you the one with a problem. So you don't want to go watch your husband ogle other women, why is that your issue. I would tell him to think of you not him and to grow up.
2006-10-09 03:52:14 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, You deserve a nice romantic weekend with just the 2 of you. I think your husband is being a bit selfish about this. Celebrating your 18 years together is not about going out with friends and staring at naked women. It's supposed to be about celebrating the fact that you found each other and showing each other how much you still love and honor each other.You have already told him how much this means to you and he needs to respect that. If he does'nt , he would be celebrating by himself!
2006-10-09 03:21:19 · answer #5 · answered by donna h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he has his priorities mixed up and maybe he needs a reality check. Why in the hell would he want to involve friends and a titty bar with the celebration of 18 yrs. of marriage? This is very strange and you have every right to not be happy about this. He needs to wise up and be a man and take care of home.
2006-10-09 03:18:43 · answer #6 · answered by liliw24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course, i will be upset! i think its time to forget the nice romantic evening, let him go to his weekend party and allow him to live a little, as he says. The next day, have a talk with him and tell him about how you feel, in a very calm manner. Tell him how important that day was to you but he just neglected you. Then ask him if you still matter to him. Then decide what to do after he has answered your questions.
2006-10-09 03:19:51 · answer #7 · answered by j6shawie26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
18 years huh? Tell him your sorry about his penis but your not about to hang out in a titty bar for your anniversary. I MIGHT be able to understand if on any OTHER weekend he wanted you guys to ge out and have that kind of fun, although the bar might be a bit much, but for your anniversary????? The man is out of his mind and ating like an insensative ***.
2006-10-09 03:23:05 · answer #8 · answered by sasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it's Your Anniversary & You want 2 be Alone with him suggest that you go to Olive Garden then a Movie if we wants to party with his friends 2 do it another week-end.He needs 2 show U some Respect & forget about his drinking I agree with U My Hubby drinks & I don't & he respects Our Time alone so I know where your comming from put your foot down & stick to what your telling him don't give into him.Good Luck
2006-10-09 03:17:25 · answer #9 · answered by sugarbdp1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think hes being an inconsiderate as*. He knows perfectly well these are things that make you uncomfortable, and a titty bar is hardly the place to celebrate your 18th ann. (unless your into that sorta thing).
2006-10-09 03:15:35 · answer #10 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋