My fiance's stepson from his previous marriage still lives in the home with us. I am very uncomfortable with this situation. This is "her" son and I feel that every move I make is being monitored and reported back to his mother. This was also the house they lived in and it's bad enough going in behind her let alone living with "her" child. I want him to move out. He is 23 years old and does not contribute to the household whatsoever. He pays no bills & does not help out around the house any . He comes in and out all hours of the nights. You never know when he's going to pop in at any given moment. I am very uncomfortable with this situation. I don't approve of his lifestyle. He goes to a lot of porn sites on the computer & I have a 14 yr old daughter that may see some of these websites. It's just a gut feeling that I have with him. I don't feel it's right. My fiance is trying to move on with his life & I don't feel it includes his ex's children? Am I wrong to feel this way?
2006-10-09 03:00:13 · 9 answers · asked by yp_kl_wilson 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You are NOT wrong.....you are going to have to make your fiance choose between the stepson and you and your daughter eventually - SOONER is better than later. This situation is bad and potentially explosive especially with your 14 year old daughter with you...in fact I'd move out house in short order and let the fiance know why. There is going to be a showdown eventually, and I'm really afraid your fiance will choose the stepson over you. You might as well get it over with and be ready for the consequences - sorry.
2006-10-09 03:07:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow what if he was 14 also? Would you want your future husband to just kick out his kid? As for a computer maybe you need to put a lock on the bad web sites so your kid can't see the bad sites???
Sounds like this 23 year old had this problem before you were in the picture. Maybe he has nowhere else to go? Sounds like if he is only your future husbands stepson, his own parents don't want much to do with him. Talk with your fiance and let him know your feelings. At least it would be a better situation if the husband would put down some rules for the 23 year old. Then if the boy does not comply and nothing is done more about it. Bottom line is if you don't like what is going on then sounds like you need to reconsider getting married.
2006-10-09 03:11:42 · answer #2 · answered by USuck79 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No but it's his dad's house and your just a boarder. Sorry for being blunt. Its still a conjugal property and you have to accept that. You have a daughter from another man and your fiancee loves him. maybe you should do the same thing too. Creating animosity between you and his kid is not helping you at all. But if you try talking and coming up with a compromise, maybe that would make him admire you more. You sound like your a sensible person..Talk to your fiancee and tell him your concerns and try to listen to what he says. Good Luck
2006-10-09 03:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by wittlewabbit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i might heavily think of that the courts are going to contemplate the newborn emotional and academic wellbeing way extra desirable than the newborn help money. With this mentioned, you ought to circulate decrease back to the courts (your husband) and report a petition to have the help money stopped for this newborn. Custody circumstances are continuously changing and the courts are continuously searching for what's in the excellent interest of the newborn.
2016-10-19 02:01:23 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look I understand you are upset.....but you say they live in that house before you came into his life so I don't think she will ask to her son to move out.......but your wife have to talk with her son and let him know he is not a kid anymore he has responsibilities as the adult he is....it is not fair he is taking advantage from both of you....he has to change to work to get a life.....
2006-10-09 03:06:47 · answer #5 · answered by haki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't push too hard just bring the moving out stuff a few times in the year. just to give him some hints that he can't stay at home forever.
2006-10-09 03:05:28 · answer #6 · answered by AppleSoda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you accepted this relationship in the begining with all the baggage. I say suck it up and deal with it, he was there before you, and will be there after you. your issues with the porn site should be addressed to the father. so should your feelings.
2006-10-09 03:11:58 · answer #7 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow what kind of woman are you? This was afterall his home before it was yours.
2006-10-09 03:03:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
nope
2006-10-09 03:02:23 · answer #9 · answered by nikkilovesjacob 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋