What can I do?

Question

The fact is I am really shy, so shy in fact that a few months ago I couldn't even talk on the phone. (Well now I can thank goodness.) But it is really ruining my life. It wasn't so bads since last year I had two friends at college but now they have gone I'm all alone and I have no one so i feel really lonely. But the worst thing is that I really really like this guy, and I did talk to him last year but now I'm scared he isn't the same person. Also I used to see him everyday because he was in two of my courses but now I will only see him on Wednesday and Friday which means I feel pushed to talk to him so I get scared clam up and do nothing. Plus this other guy had hijacked him as a friend so now I can't get near him. I don't know whether to just give up and forget him, but I can't stop thinking about him. I feel so lonely and confused I'm thinking of leaving this college and starting again somewhere else, but it would mean I'd have to settle somewhere else. Can anyone help with any of .

this, please no stupid answers. I'm really down and I keep crying and none of this stuff should bother me but it does. I feel so invisable and dead inside.
I know I have already asked this question but afternoon people are much more helpful then morning people.

Answer 1

you know,dreamer dear, you are still very young. as we grow older and experience different things in life we grow wiser. you should not sit around crying. take a few minutes to talk to god. talk to him as if you were talking to a friend. tell him everything about what you think, what you feel. ask for his help. you can repeat this several times a day " i can do all things through crist who strengthens me." or another good one is " no weapon formed against me shall prosper". your young ,baby, give youself a break, time to grow, time to figure out who you are. linda

Answer 2

I hate answering with words when you want contact so very much. I will try, and since I am old enough to be your Great Grandfather please be tolerant when reading the following.

I believe you are mixing two different problems together making any single solution difficult.
So lets separate the girls from the boys.
Forget boys for the moment as your solution lies with yourself and the girls. Solve this first and the other will follow.
Do it the reverse way and you will never be your own person.

You know right from wrong and wrong is no-go under any circumstance, but where it isn't try to conform with the girls, in fact do more than that.
Choose one as your mentor and get her to show you the girly ropes on how to do things that are acceptable to them.
Don't do it better though, just enough to show them you are trying.
When you feel comfortable with them try motivating something and that will make you feel better.
Success brings confidence, and if by now you have their trust they can confide in you. Now you are now ready for the boys.
This group is far easier to predict or manage than your own sex.
Look upon boys as being actors trying to display their skills.
Know they are nothing more than a pool of males who rejoin their group after being thrown back by girls for recycling.
I bet their first words each evening, no their plaintiff words when they meet, are 'What shall we do tonight?'
They are your target, you are not theirs.
You stalk and snare, they think they have have power and they are wrong.
You can't do this without girl training first. So watch them at work and where they fail, make a note to develop your own strategy.
When I selected my wife from a group she was almost chaperoned into position so she could strike.
Males don't have power they have an illusion of it.
Women are mentally stronger and far more focused than boys.
It's as I said,'They are looking for guidance'.
Don't leave people you know now, row them into your problem but collectively, otherwise they will dish the dirt with each other.

Good Luck, and remember luck comes from working hard.
You are you own person with your own power.
You just have to know your direction.

Answer 3

Your question is good and long with a lot of helpful information. But you have only one problem once that is solved ever thing else will fall into place. Shyness is a problem that can be over come. It maybe that you’re just blaming shyness for the other problems in your life. But lets get you over being shy first. I’m sure there are many books that can help one over come shyness, but I understand shyness very well since I was very shy my self and over came it.

Shyness is fear and like the old saying goes “face fear and it will run from you” and that’s just what you must do face your fear. Years ago I decided I would overcome my shyness some how. So I started like a journal. Got myself a cheap binder notebook. And started keeping track of how shyness was controlling my daily life. I was surprised to find out just how much control shyness had over my life. Every time I didn’t do something because of my shyness I would write it down. Then each day I would do at least one thing that I felt too shy to do. Maybe just a very simple something. But I would write it down in my shyness journal. It may be hard at first but just face the easiest things first as you start off. Then I believe that as you advance step by step you will be at ease doing greater and grater things.
I’ve played in bands for a number of years and remember the first time I sang in front of a crowd of people. I was so shy I choked up and I sang terrible. But as time went on and I did it over and over, I had no fear at all.
Truly you can over come your shyness but you must be determined. Get mad and tell yourself enough is enough. The first time you try you may choke up. But if you want to over come your shyness you must keep trying you will over come it and I guarantee it.
By the way many men find shyness in a girl very attractive. Have you ever been to Japan? Most all girls there act very shy because it a desirable trait.

Answer 4

Girl put ur self together. Dont leave ur college (what are u nuts?)
Calm down and breath deep. What u got to do is not worry about the future, time will take its course. Just say hi and ask him how his week been going, and pretty soon u will feel comfortable around him. Feel positive and never let ur nerves get to you. Make some friends, A simple "hi" can go a long way. Buckle up, put ur chin hi and walk "darn it"!!!.

Good luck and be patient, dont worry about the future just take it easy and go with the flow.

Answer 5

try to tell your opinions and ideas.it is so bad that you are shy.but you can change it.don't leave your college for a boy.you are shy and if you go somewhere else,what will you do?you don't have friends in this college and you won't have friends in another college,too.because,you are very shy.why are you afraid?because of others opinions or you think that you will think like you are stupid?come on,you can't live with these fears.don't be shy.say them what you think.
if you want speak too much about it,send me an e-mail...

Answer 6

u need to be brave enough to go through this life..and that means not being shy.lets forget the guy for a while & concentrate on you & only you.what is it u want in your life more then anything else?
might turn out that u are missing a lot cause oh this shyness...might be you are losing much more choices in life cause u let urself not have the option for more to decide out...
dot cut urself away from options by being shy...
u got to break away from the cycle...its hard i know...but still...have open ur life to this choice?

Answer 7

eing a shy person is very hard on ones self .but hon if you really like him dont give up ,!!!stay there let him know how you feel dont worry about others in his life let him know .face your fears and you will become a stronger person .dont leave that school ,face this and let him know how you feel about him .try not to be sad .here is a word of advise dust your bottom ,get back up and fight .meaning dont let being shy rob you of a good life .I will be praying for yah .be strong I know its not easy but once you face your fears you will become a much stronger person .

Answer 8

In my shyness . . .
At times I retreat to my "shell,"
Clinging to the security of being alone.

In my shyness . . .
I may attempt to merge with my surroundings--
To be ignored, unnoticed, a silent voice rarely heard.

In my shyness . . .
I can feel completely alone,
Although surrounded by people.

In my shyness . . .
I'm perceived as having a padlocked soul--
And few try to gain entry into my realm.

In my shyness . . .
Few will dare venture to really know me--
To hear my quiet voice or to really try to understand.

In my shyness . . .
I can have a myriad of words to say,
Yet, my sealed lips will not release them.

In my shyness . . .
The words I do speak will at times be jumbled,
And I'll feel worse for having spoken them.

In my shyness . . .
I will be viewed as "stuck up" and unfriendly,
Labeled by the presumption of a troubled past.

Yet, despite my shyness . . .
I will at times emerge from my "shell,"
And you may catch a glimpse of who I am.

And despite my shyness . . .
I may put on a good "front,"
Disguising my innermost insecurities.

Despite my shyness . . .
A select few will manage to penetrate these "walls,"
With the sharing of time and the evolving of trust.

My shyness . . .
Frequently unrecognized, seldom understood--
A shackle, a haven, a veil.

Answer 9

you need to concentrate on your study i am giving you this advice like a sister. if you don't mind can i ask you 1 thing if you don't know about him then how u r positive about him if u mind anything plz forgive me
OK

Answer 10

get his mobile number and send him a text message saying ''how about we meet up one night ? '. you can be as shy as you like sending a text to him and it will still get to him.