We have just moved countries. We have only been here for 7 weeks, and already I am wanting to return. My husband has a good job, but is never home now. The kids are in school. They are not happy in the school that they are in. I am stuck at home all day,as I don't yet have a job. This is the first time in my working life that I haven't had a job. My husband doesn't want me to get one, and says it is time for me to relax and stay at home. It is driving me crazy. I don't know anyone here. I don't know my way around, and won't drive since we got here, as the volume of traffic terrifies me. i have tried to catch a bus a couple of times to go places, but am scared of getting lost.Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Should I give it more time, and try to 'relax and stay at home' ? I really am getting quite depressed, and have been in tears a lot lately. I also have 2 older children who are still in our previous country. I miss them heaps as well. I have no family here. Any help ???
2006-10-09 02:10:19 · 8 answers · asked by pixie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It is always difficult settling in to a new country, its a huge change, everything is unfamiliar and difficult. I have done it myself and there were many tears in the first few months. I think you should give it some time though. Put a time limit on it like if you still hate it in 6 months then leave. You definitely, definitely need to work though. If you are someone who has always worked and needs to be occupied there is nothing more depressing than not working. It is bad for the soul and the self esteem. Also, very importantly, work is where you are going to meet people and people are the key to happiness. If you made yourself a network of friends then you would be much happier. As for the kids, give them some time as they are the same as us, it takes them a while to settle in and make friends and if in a few months they still hate their school then maybe it is a crappy school and they could change schools. I know how you feel, i have been there myself but i love my new city now. Good luck. PS: If you got a job maybe you could catch a cab places with the extra cash until you feel more familiar with the city to catch the bus
2006-10-09 02:23:11 · answer #1 · answered by Caroline 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have relocated every 3 years for the past 15 years. Give it more time, go out and meet some people and learn about new things. Not knowing your way around is normal. If this is a temporary move - take the opportunity to braoden your horizons. Relax about not having a job, your husband is right. Life is not all about work.
Chances are you might find the new country better than the old one in many ways. I come from the US, but since I left I have discovered that there are so many nicer places to live and would never even think of going back there permanently.
2006-10-09 09:18:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sanmigsean 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well - what does your husband think?? You have not had time to get to know the place or your children- contact the chamber of commerce and ask if they have info for new residents- many places do- I would get a part time job while the kids are in school= you sound too isolated and that would be depressing-you can always ask a bus driver or kind person for directions- have you thought about volunteering some of your time- it would be helpful and good to get out- I moved away from my fam and it was quite an adjustment- it took some time-it got better-bless you and take care- D
2006-10-09 09:19:20 · answer #3 · answered by Debby B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully before you moved, you knew all this stuff..about not working, staying home... You knew it was a different country and yes new people, lots of traffic...You did your homework right?????Well you are here now, so make the best of it..... QUIT FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF, get up off the couch and get involved in something... Take an exercise class. volunteer at the school, find out if there is a church group..take some classes for fun..If you mope around your family is surely feeling the burden of this... Set the example for your children, and be strong.. this is a wonderful opportunity to get involved maybe in another culture...
Get to know the people in your area, go to the markets, blend in my girl... it should be so exciting and new and different... Think of it as an adventure......
Have fun!!!!!!!!
2006-10-09 09:19:27 · answer #4 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. I think you would be best off getting involved in some activities...things you have always wanted to explore but never had time for. There must be some redeeming qualities about living in a new place...let alone a new country.
Your children are bound to adjust...give that one more time. Support them, love them and encourage them to also see the opprtunities they have.
as for missing family, remember you can arrange to visit friends and family-or you can get SKYPE and talk to them...
Your husbands must have seen the opportunity of taking this new position as a positive step for the family, you are part of that family and he needs you.
Good luck, chin up!
2006-10-09 09:16:38 · answer #5 · answered by Boler 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is only been 7 weeks
give it time at least so when you state your case to your husband you will have some leverage
I move from the US to the Caribbean (ST Barts) people who visit here will think that I am in paradise
but from time to time I want to run away
the 1st few month I cried myself to sleep and I call back home every morning & every night
now I am getting better
Good Luck
2006-10-09 09:18:18 · answer #6 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like only your husbands happy try to tell him how you feel and get through to him without argueing the part where you said you other two kids living somwhere else ,thats not good .you shouldnt have to go to a whole nother coutry to see your kids.but in the meen time just try to relax it sounds like you need to.but the part about your kids not likeing school well they will get used to it just like there first ever days of school.
2006-10-09 09:17:45 · answer #7 · answered by ~*The Show Must Go On*~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go home. Life is too short to be miserable.
2006-10-09 09:12:06 · answer #8 · answered by Bubbles 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋