About once a month I go through a phase of being really grumpy, picky and sometimes nasty to my wife. We've been married a month, was with each other 2 and a half years prior to the wedding. These mood swings of mine have been present throughout the relationship.
She's an Angel and puts up with it, even though at the time I know it hurts her......
I really don't want to be a horrid git.........??? Any ideas??
2006-10-08 23:12:38 · 22 answers · asked by Malc S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Stop being horrible.
2006-10-08 23:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that in the long run one day she will not be anymore patient and loving to you. We all have a limit to our patience no matter how much we love that person. When you bring a person to the extent of exasperation, you never know what the consequences will be. I suggest that if you plan to have children, you need to solve the problem. It is terrible to see a parent that gets into these moods without a real reason. Seek some professional help or have a good talk with a friend and let whatever it is just out of your system. There must be a reason to this behavior.
Think a least for a few minutes before you say or do anything that can hurt her. It is very difficult nowadays to find someone that is an Angeli like you say she is. Be grateful and don't throw this gift away. Hope things get better for the both of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is it because you are doing something that is not right and this makes you feel guilty??!!!
2006-10-08 23:38:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey - us women can tell you all about mood swings! You need to find another way to release your adrenaline when these things kick in. Different things work for different people but one of the best is to get a good sweat on - go running, go to the gym, whatever. Talk to your wife when you are both calm and explain that you don't like this behaviour in yourself. Arrange with her that when you start feeling like this that you will take 'time out' and then try to stick with it. Don't come back into the situation until you feel better. Avoid alcohol and other drugs like the plague, they will make things much worse. If the problem persists then seek professional counselling. Don't beat yourself up if you mess up occasionally, nobody's perfect and it takes time to change bad habits. Remember to talk honestly to your wife - she will want to help you too. Good luck!
2006-10-08 23:20:53 · answer #3 · answered by stienbabe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to seek out professional help on this. These mood swings as you call them maybe underlying mental disorder problems and only a professional can help you. You say you had them b4 the marriage so the marriage has nothing to do with this. You could be Bi-Polar or have something else going on in your head.
Seek out professional help b4 your mood swings become violent and your wife takes the blunt of your anger. It's bad enough she's having to endure your verbal and mental abuse now...what will you be like months or years down the road????
Make that appointment and do it today......before your wife leaves you !!!
2006-10-08 23:22:42 · answer #4 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may be suffering from depression. My ex had the same thing and it eventually cost us our marriage. You should start by talking to your general practioner. Maybe you need counseling as well. Your wife will begin to hold each of these episodes against you. She will no longer trust when you are going to be the sweet wonderful guy she married and when you are going to be a nasty jerk. Instead of enjoying the good moods she will begin to wait for the bad ones. There is nothing wrong with suffering from depression but there is something wrong with not treating it.
2006-10-09 00:55:40 · answer #5 · answered by working mother 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure your wife "puts up with you" because she loves you and accepted all things about you, good and bad. Nobody is perfect, and she understands that. If you feel bad, then maybe when you have your grumpy moods, you should try to keep a bit of a distance from her so you don't unintentionally hurt her.
BTW, congrats on getting married, good luck with your life together.
2006-10-08 23:15:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have her log on to this site and show her this question that you asked and have her answer it instead of us! That is what you call communicating, which is the most important ingredient for a long lasting marriage. It just can't keep going on like this.You are not in denial ., so the first step for change is conquered , now open up and share with her ' and come up with a solution together.Good Luck and thanks for being a big enough man for admitting you have a problem.
2006-10-08 23:41:50 · answer #7 · answered by ptt_pntr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive been married now for 7 months. I think that when you first get married, the first few months...you experience this strange change. I can't tell you what it is....but you will go through periods of very high highs, and low lows...you do need to try and control this. She should and probably will begin to give you your boundries. For instance my husband started calling me names. He is working on it....give it time.....you should begin to realise where you are in your life...and you will get used to being Husband and Wife...cause the truth is...things do change, and you have to change with them.
Month 7 is fantastic.
Youll get through it....but, try and be nice. SHe is going through the same change as well.
2006-10-09 00:29:51 · answer #8 · answered by AnnieAdams 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thsi sounds like a case of depression. The highs of marriage, can often be followed by feelings of anger/sadness/guilt and manifest themselves as grumpiness and that leads to arguments etc.
Its a good idea to tell your wife exaclty how you feel, so she understands. Then go and see you GP. They know best and can help.
I have been through this and its tough, but sort it out.....it saved my marriage and it can yours too I hope.
Always here if you want a chat
2006-10-08 23:22:45 · answer #9 · answered by Wee Eck 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain it to her and when it comes on, get out of the house, go for something to eat, you evidently have an issue you need to learn how to control. Are you thinking you made the wrong decision. If you are like this after one month what is 10 years going to do to you. Grow up and control your emotions, this is your special lady, treat her so.
2006-10-08 23:25:17 · answer #10 · answered by Mr. PDQ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may have put up with you this long but in time it may just push her away from you. Try to find other ways of releasing your stress and not on the woman you love. If you have to talk to a counselor about it they may give you some advice.
2006-10-09 01:59:59 · answer #11 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋