Hi...I will try not to go into alot of detail but i am a very "shy" socially anxious person...I am a 17 yr. old male and i have had this problem my entire life...I got a phone call from one of my "former" friends and i started getting extremely nervous; my heart starting POUNDING, i started sweating, i was breathing hard, and quite frankly couldn't carry on the conversation...People have told me to "just be myself" and "don't worry about what others think of you!" but that helps me VERY minimal...My father was anything but shy and i don't have a clue how i got this...I would appreciate any suggestions or some advise for this problem......thanks.
2006-10-08 20:01:07 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
well I was told if one is scared of flying, then take a plane to overcome the fears...
if you are shy, then go to parties, so what if at first you just stand in the corner alone, sooner or later someone will approach you, that you feel comfortable with...To over come your fears, work with the fears slowly - you seem to know what your fears are... when talking on the phone, only talk for a minute, and work your way up to 5-10mins, just polity say your goodbyes....Give any excuse, the person on the other end doesn't know....
If you pass someone on the street you know - just smile or wave nod your head, work your way up to saying hello...
You will over come these things - but you have to work with them....
2006-10-08 20:18:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different. Some are born naturally outgoing & the rest of us are shy, nervous and introverted. First of all, realize that there is nothing wrong with you. You are in good company, some of the most intelligent & talented people in the world have been painfully shy. Maybe it's because they spent time alone rather than being social & were able to read more, write more, paint, make music or whatever it is they do. We tend to be more solitary creatures. We feel more comfortable alone than in crowds. You may find someone special that you feel completely comfortable with though. Just give it time.
Don't try to be something you're not, just embrace who you are. Try to relax & take deep breaths. Try not to panic. But don't push yourself too hard. Your dad may be outgoing it doesn't mean you have to be. It's true that you shouldn't worry what people think but in fact you are your own worst enemy. You probably make yourself anxious by overanalyzing everything. Sometimes very intelligent & sensitive people think too much & drive themselves crazy! Your brain doesn't shut off & you work yourself into a frenzy.
Don't worry, ok? Take deep breaths. Think of something calming. You are ok. If it's bothering you that much maybe talk to your doctor about it. They might be able to suggest counselling or something. There are many books on anxiety as well. You are not alone! Many people suffer from social anxiety.
There's nothing wrong with being shy! I'm shy. It used to worry me more in my teens & 20's but in my 30's I'm proud of who I am. It will get better & you will get more confident as you get older.
Take care sweetie.
2006-10-08 20:18:46 · answer #2 · answered by amp 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may have social anxiety disorder or panic attacks. You should talk to your dad about seeing a doctor for this. You can find out about calming exericises and ways of dealing with anxiety or medication recommendations (like xanax).
2006-10-08 20:10:56 · answer #3 · answered by lynnguys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can get over this.
Get some counseling. Take some small babysteps to change. Don't do it all at once.
2006-10-08 20:11:56 · answer #4 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋