I'm 17 and bisexual (I live in Narnia... if you know what I mean) . This straight guy who I work with wants to know if I like somebody (I like one of our co-workers who is a guy). This guy is a really sweet and nice friend and I don't want to ruin our friendship by telling him that I'm bi. He keeps bugging me at work and I warned him that he might hate me if I tell him who I like. I'm afraid that he might be one of those homophobic straight guys but I don't want to lie to him, because so far he's been nothing but nice to me and I want him to know all about me.
Can you please give me some advice? And please, SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY.
2006-10-08 17:46:22 · 10 answers · asked by Gomenasai 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
i think you should not tell him yet. im a lesbian and i know what people are like, and how people react. he might be one of those homophobic straight guys. why dont u try to find out what he thinks of gay people b4 u tell him.
2006-10-08 17:49:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm straight, but I think I may be able to help...? If you really feel that he may end up being one of those guys who is a homophobe, hint at the issue a bit. Bring up something in the news regarding gay marriage and see how he reacts. I can understand how telling him straight out could be risky, especially since you work together and many companies do not have rules regarding this.
If he seems okay with the gay marriage issue, then you're probably safe in telling him. Unless he is a horrible person--which he doesn't sound like--he won't spread it around if you ask him not to.
If he reacts negatively to hints you give him, you may want to analyze the friendship. If he finds out you're bi, would he be a "danger" to you. (I mean, would he spread it or make mean comments?)
If you want to remain friends with him, though, you probably should tell him sometime. He will keep pressuring you about who you like, and it will begin to wear on both of you if there's any kind of tension in the answer.
The only reason I mention spreading the fact that you're bisexual as an issue is because it is obviously a very private thing for you, which is okay in my book. I don't walk around proclaiming my straightness, and I hate that many straight people think homosexuals and bisexuals should have to wear some kind of sign. Ugh.
Good luck!
2006-10-08 17:56:06 · answer #2 · answered by Esma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A true friend will not let something like sexual orientation interfere with your relationship. However; I would suggest that you test the waters. That would be like dropping hints about gay culture or issues. Hey try asking how he feels about the Former Rep from Florida Mark Foley. If he's really a homophobic, it will show then and you'll know. Don't bring anything out without testing the water first. By the way; don't mess around with people you work with, because it can become very messy.
2006-10-08 17:58:47 · answer #3 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should realise urself first that u r not a bisexual , actually at this age males get this kind of feeling but it may be just due to the fact that u cant access a girl straight-way for sexual pleasures but u can ask a boy about tjis very easily . so there is nothing bad in u and concentrate on realising ur hetrosexuality , then u will not have to make excuses or hide something .
and mind it - I m saying this by experience.
and for the person u like he might be just a very good friend of u and very close to u.
it is normal.
God Bless You!!!
2006-10-08 17:54:05 · answer #4 · answered by cool chap 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
ok first of all, you are acting kinda gay but i dont blame you. this is the thing, you are gay and you worry about the guy whether he will not like you if you tell him who you like. gay guys and girls only worry about that kind of sh*t. well i cant tell you to just be a man about it, because i cant. but i can tell you this, dont let him know. second, you barely know him, you only work with him, you're not his friend, so dont trust him. i see people like this all the time, trust me, him being nice doesnt mean anything to me. he will change that if he know you are not what he expect you to be. i dont mean to insult you, i am just being honest with my opinion. you dont have to take my advise, but i hope it helps. good luck
2006-10-08 17:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
im straight and i think if he is straight too he ll probably be a lil offended and tell u u r cool to hang with but don t try to be stickin in him
2006-10-08 17:53:37 · answer #6 · answered by bob w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I will not tell him that I'm inlove with him. I will suffer for being a liar than to lose my friend.
2006-10-08 17:50:50 · answer #7 · answered by psychedelic_me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well juts let him think your gay and not bi. and as far as liking some one just tell him yes but they dont work here or what ever
2006-10-08 17:50:14 · answer #8 · answered by rx8 slotcar 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, you have to tell him the truth sometime. If he values your friendship, he will not ruin it.
2006-10-08 17:54:02 · answer #9 · answered by Justin L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if he was realy your friend he wouldn't care
2006-10-08 17:48:56 · answer #10 · answered by the dragon king 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋