Is this wrong...because im in love...?

Question

I met this guy on Yahoo Actually... We have been talking for a long time. We eventually got where we were talking to each other on the phone.. he lives in California and in live in Texas.. he thought I was 17 when he said he loved me.. I told him I loved him to and said that I was 14... at first he was weird about it but now hes not.. We use to talk as much as possible on Xbox Live mostly then i got a cell phone so sometimes on there and then at my house phone. He went to Basic Training for the Army.. he is gonna be an Army Medic. We write to eachother as much as possible. He is 20 years old.. and were in love with a 6 year age difference.. he is gonna visit me in December.. my mother dosent know anything aobut him...or that he is going to be see me in december. ... is that wrong that im in love with a 20 year old and he loves me back...and what we have been doing (like talking) ..me and my best friend are going to live with him when i graduate from high school.sheistheonly1whonos

Answer 1

There's absolutely nothing wrong with that...as long as ur comfortable with the situation then you're okay. If you love him go for it! Good luck...and oh yeah i would tell my mom about him before he gets there because you wouldn't want her finding out from someone else.

Answer 2

IFirst of all,don't you think your mom is going to be a little upset when a soldier comes to the door at Christmas,and states "hey lady I'm like in love with your underage daughter,and I don't have much time so excuse us while I have SEX with her ,while you guys open gifts.!!!! Most parents will not be very understanding in a situation like that.I do not think it is wrong to dream but when a dream gets in the way of reality ,then there is a problem.At 14 you cannot know your mind ,you are only listening to your heart.And as young ladies when we listen to our heart nothing good will come out of it. Also if this guy is willing to have secrets ,what is he hiding from you. He is a voice on the phone,not a real person.He is a man trying to get a career started, how can this include you? Do the math in 6 yrs. you will be 20. But in 6 yrs. he will be 26,and I can promise you he will not be the same person,nor will you.I have been through this situatition before.......know what he said"I am not the same man ,we have outgrown each other." Then he moved on ,I cried my eyes out and then I moved on. squirlyShirley1

Answer 3

You are living in the future. You have no idea what's going to happen in 4 years so stop planning! Also, I think you need to look at this from a broader perspective because you're so focused on and wrapped up in your feelings that you can't see what's really happening and what you really should do. It's easy to fall for people online and on the phone. Meeting them is often a very different experience. If I had any say in what you do, I'd say keep the relationship over the internet until you're out of high school. Then decide where to go from there. You also have to tell your mom. You can't lie to her about this.

Answer 4

Girlfriend ..slow down sweetie ! He and you do not know each other yet. You have "Big" plans that can be all blown away at the drop of a hat ! If he is leaving for the service he will be around a lot of females and since he does not know you this could be a fly by night online romance. Try to come back down to earth some precious. take your time and sit down and talk to mom and tell her what you told us. By experience you may get a real bad heartbreak !
Mom may tell you the same thing I just did you are too young still try to concentrate on school don't be so eager to fly the coop with a man you do not know or may never meet. You may be in for a rude awakening ! Good Luck !

Answer 5

Ok you have no idea what your doing, A man who joins the military is scared and holding on to who ever will write or be with him during basic, he is a loyal puppy.
When he gets to Ft. Sam Houston its party time all the other female medic trainees who are going through the same hard training, thats who he is gonna fall for.
They will be in the same situation, together everyday, then she gets orders for Iraq and he gets orders for someplace else and marrys her so they get sent together. There is a 40% chance he will get married after tech school, he dosen't think he will get married nobody does. If you were say 18 you may have been the girl he waited for, but can you even imagine a 20 year old showing off his 14 year old Girl friend to all his buddies, not going to happen.

SORRY, thats what happens
A veteran medic
P.S. he not going to visit you in December either

Answer 6

First of all u may think u r in love but u r not cause u don't even know him and he probably is some psychotic killer or sexual pervert cause he's feeding u these childish lines.You need to not meet him no matter what and do not let him know exactly where u live, what is wrong with u?Don't u watch the news or hear of all the tragadies that happen every day because young girls like u who don't know any better and it is so sad.Don't take any chances it is not worth it and don't tell ur mother cause she will freak out cut off ur inetrnet usage call the cops or something crazy like that but it really can be that serious.When i was young i've done crazy and stupid things too but times are getting worse and i believe the only reason i'm here today is because of chance.By chance i trusted my gut and didn't get into the car of some random strange older guy who could've harmed me although normally i would have and by chance a person i've met off of a chat happened to be a decent guy and not hold me hostage but i know now to never let chance happen to me again because i know better than too take any risks like that again.i know ur young but that's no reason to be dumb ur old enough to know better and i don't mean to scare u but it's a crazy world out here. Whatever u choose to do just be extremely careful and may god bless you.

Answer 7

A 14 year old girl planning to run off with a 20 year old man and hiding her plans from her parents is a recipe for danger, abuse and a ruined life. A relationship between TWO ADULTS is characterized by honesty, open communication, mutual family respect and trust. Why do you need your best friend to go with you to live with him? Was that his idea or your best friend's? How old is your best friend? I think you should tell your mother about this man and if he is really intent on being a friend to you, he will meet your parents and give you time to grow up and become independent before making any "adult moves" on you- or your friend. Be careful, dear. Some mistakes cannot be corrected.

Answer 8

Look.. It's a bad idea. he's a perv for even considering a 14 year old.

And even if you won't listen to that and just "loooove" him... think of it like this:

You'll ruin his life. He'll be dishonorably discharged from the army, brought up on statutory rape charges, likely serve at least some jail time, labeled a sexual predator, have to have his name published in the sex offender registry wherever he moves as a sex offender, and if in 4 years you guys get married and try to have a "normal" life... it won't work.

Many parents.. including me.. check the registry for our area once every few months to see who to look out for. If you have kids.. likely they'll be picked on because Daddy is a "perv" (even if he's a nice guy blah blah blah), kids won't be allowed over your house, and your kids will get the cold shoulder from others.

It will literally haunt his life forever.

So... stay away and end contact. Because he'll ruin you and your life... and you'll ruin his.

He's not worth it.. he's too old for you.. he should know that. It's not illegal just for the fun of it.. there's a huge difference in 14 and 20. If it wasn't wrong.. you wouldn't have to hide it.

Answer 9

Sweety, this is not okay at all. If your parents discover what is going on, he could be sent to jail and you could be grounded for life. Actually, he might be sent to prison. For having sex with you or even putting his hands on you in the wrong ways, he might find himself facing statutory rape charges. Plus, he will have to register as a child molester/ sex offender when he gets out. His future will be messed up and his career in the army could be put in jeopardy. I do not know why he's not thinking straight. Of course you were dead wrong to be lying about your age, but as soon as he found out he should have told you that y'all could only be distant friends until you got older. I am in my 20s and I could not imagine talking to a little fourteen-year old boy whose only a few years older than my little nephew. And how do you know he does not have a girlfriend already and that he's not using you for amusement during his free time. There are a few in this world but I don't know many young grown men who don't like to get laid all the time. I am sorry to be harsh, but some guys are such sweet talkers who will make you believe that they love you so much, but they really don't. They just want to keep you hanging on while they brag to their player-praising buddies that they have another girl living in another city/state. You need to take everything I have said into serious consideration. Slow Down because in the end things could turn out ugly for you. You could be hurt. Your mom could be hurt. He could end up getting seriously hurt in prison/jail especially if he gets charged with child molestation. If it is meant to be, instead of paying a high price, you two should just wait for each other. If one of you or the both of you can't do that, then the plain truth is that it is not true love and not meant to be.

Answer 10

No hun its not wrong but is against the law for anyone over the age of 18 to have sexual relations with you.But nothing is wrong with conversation or meeting someone.But when you meet him make sure you guys are around a lot of people and that you tell your friends where you will be.Lots of girls are missing because of sick men snatching them up online.Be careful and use common sense.If something doesn't seem right,then go with that gut feeling and go back home or call for help.I wish you only the best.Stay safe