i am married for 30yrs and can not support myself on what i get so if i stay married to a person who puts me down and treats me ugly should i leave anyway. he talks terrible and i feel so unwanted??
2006-10-08 12:30:48 · 17 answers · asked by neet 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Disability is only in the head, if you have limited use of limbs, that is a blessing, you can still move. What you're doing is allowing your husband to dictate what you can't do. Get to the nearest Social Security office, present your problem and allow help to come your way. "You are what you believe"!
2006-10-08 12:38:40 · answer #1 · answered by ~Jessica~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Never stay in any abusive relationship. There is always a way out. He know you will not leave him so he can basically do anything to you. Surprise him and leave even though you may still love him.
Bad relationships cause stress and stress caused bad health like cancer and heart disease. If you are not ready to die and give up your life for this man, leave and do it soon.
First make a plan. A way to leave a place to stay just to get started over. Best to leave the area and start fresh. It is hard without money but not impossible. Talk with a womens agency in your town like a Womans Center or Family Resource Center.
Don't ever let a man put you down. You are Gods creation and one of a kind and worthy. Realize this man will never change and its been 30 yrs. You are never stuck. Ask around, go to a support group and get answers. When you start over you may find a roommate, a part-time job, a hobby to be around people, or a little studio you can afford. The state can help you maybe with SS or SSI or temporary assistance.
Anyone can start over even after 30 yrs you just want to bad enough.
2006-10-08 12:48:34 · answer #2 · answered by Nevada Pokerqueen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Neetie, I am so very sorry that you are going through such a round time. You should stay in a relationship that is emotionally abusive. Call and see if your SSI check would increase if you were living on your own. Also, look into an apartment that is baised on your income. I just helped a friend move into a eldery and disable apartment complex. His rent is only $87 a month. You would be egilable for food stamps.
Do you have any family that could help you till you get on your feet? Have you applied to see if you qualify for a full Social Security check? You could do some calling around and just ask questions. I hate that you feel you must stay in such a unhappy and unhealthy home, because of the lack of money. Please check into how much you would recieve living on your own, please don't give up, there's got to be a way. Wished I was loaded, I would build an apartment complex for people like yourself, and several other friends that are in similar situations.
Praying that you can find the strength and courage to leave, and the money to do so....
God bless us all...........................
2006-10-08 14:05:20 · answer #3 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should consult some of the woman's services in your area for guidance. No one should have to suffer verbal attacks from anyone, much less their spouse who is suppose to be loving. It's not an easy situation...do you have family that could take you in or help you? If you did file for divorce you would have alimony payments in addition to your disability? Speaking to professionals is in your best interest. Usually the blue section of the white pages has agencies. So does the web if you google, spousal abuse and the area you live in. Good luck!!! Life is full of magic. Keep asking for answers and help and they will both come.
2006-10-08 13:40:00 · answer #4 · answered by devilmaycare 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you qualify for Social Security? Do you have family that will take you in? Is there a shelter that can give aid? Do you own property together? Are you male or female? Females can get help through women's shelters and or groups. You would qualify for welfare. If you own a house, half of it is yours, and if you live in the US, he gets to pay alimony to you for the rest of your life, provided that you do not marry again. I would get a few recordings of the abuse first then move forward. Call an attorney. No one deserves to be treated like crap! Good luck.
2006-10-08 12:39:28 · answer #5 · answered by It All Matters.~☺♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there no one should be in a marriage nor a relationship if they are getting put down it does nto do your self esteem any good and in the future it may make you feel like you do not trust any guys and you do not want to feel that way. My advice is maybe have a talk to him im not saying that will solve it but it may help and if that fails i would be going along the path of leaving him you dont deserve to be trated like that. Good luck on any decision that you choose to make.
2006-10-08 12:35:42 · answer #6 · answered by aussie06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its never right to stay in a marriage if your using someone and you don't love them not fair to you or him. your both cheating each other.
Many people are disabled in life, but they make a go out of it. do what they have to do. The easy way out of course would be to stay with someone but no one wants to be used.
I say you should stand on your own rather than staying with someone just for money and someone who can support you. Deep down you won't be proud of yourself.
You can do it good luck
2006-10-08 18:48:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this question has some thing to do with earnings, which you probably did no longer point out. the actual answer is "besides the fact that your lawyer can get from his lawyer". given which you're no longer working, you will desire to get a particularly great quantity of youngster help, yet in lots of states you may no longer get extra effective than 40 5% of his examine (and if he has different mamas to pay, its 40 5% for all his little ones). And 40 5% is tremendously harsh (no one gets that plenty many times), nevertheless you need to have the particular circumstances that ought to get you that plenty.
2016-10-02 02:28:26 · answer #8 · answered by lyon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a shame after 30 years of marriage..........But nothing last forever for everyone unfortunately.......(.No one has a right to talk down to another person.) In most states as far as I know the house and everything you own jointly is split down the middle. Then you can start over..............Buy a smaller house. which you should be able to since you split the money from the house you live in now..Good luck to you
2006-10-08 12:37:52 · answer #9 · answered by mom of a boy and girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will find a way to make it. Get Rid Of Him by Joyce Vedral is a book I am reading right now. Good stuff. According to the author, he is putting you down and treating you ugly so you will feel so bad that you CANNOT leave. Get rid of him!
2006-10-08 12:34:56 · answer #10 · answered by mickeyg1958 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋