My one year old wants to be held almost all the time. Kinda typical I know but when I put him down, he cries. Not just a normal cry, but he sounds like someone is killing him!! He shrieks so loud its akmost ear-piercing, he even loses his breath. He will not stop until I pick him up again. Now my 3 year old is following his brothers lead and screams over basically most things. I cant even go to the bathroom without the horrible screams. I need serious advice, helpful, proven ways, on how to stop this cycle. I have always been a hands on type of mom. I play with them on the floor for hours every day. I sing to them, we have fun bath times, we go outside and play daily. I dont know what I'm doing wrong. Can you please help this harried mom of 2? Thank you
2006-10-08 07:53:00 · 4 answers · asked by luisa_duran2000 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you have taken them to the doctor to make sure there is nothing physically wrong with them(ear infections, stomach aches, etc) and if there is not, then I would say they are just spoiled. It's an easy thing to do, to spoil them, but the end result is that is is not good for Mom, nor baby. Make sure all is fine with them, not hungry or wet, and if it is....let them cry it out. It's not going to hurt them to cry some, and in the long run, will make your life easier. Best of luck to you!
2006-10-08 08:05:23 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I also have children, and I' dont have any proven ways, but I found out tht you have to retrain them. I have a 6yr old an a 11mth old. The baby runs the house, then my six year old realized that if he criee dmore and asked questions, he'd get attention too. I was just like you. But I had to stop, and do the normal and not pick up who ever was screaming. The more you talk to hima nd explain to him what you have to do and go do it, the less they will fight you. If your as hands on as you say, then you know all thier crys, you know when they are really hurt, or when they just need attention. Try to focus on something else so you can at least go to the bathroom in peace. My oldest did that to me, I use to be inthe bath room and had his own little chair and patiently waited til I finished. I realized I was loosing my mind for bringing him with me during the only moment of the day I had for myself. It the crys that get you jsut keep reminding yourself that they are ok. And don't go soft. They know. Trust tht they willcatch on, an soon they won't even pay yoou any attention.
During chores, get the 3yr old to help, but you gotta act really exctied and silly. Always remember they have only been around for 3yrs and 1 year. all this is new. But they know how to get their way. Good luck
2006-10-08 08:33:27 · answer #2 · answered by confused mom 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The answer is easy...but the solution is not.
Your 1 yr old is going through a separation anxiety phase(which can last from 3 ms to 3 yrs)...which means that he is now aware that you and him are not a single being and that you as a mother and woman and adult have other compromises that are not always him.So you leave him(and in his head he thinks you MAY never come back) wich is not the case.
The way to help that along is to little by little put him down on the floor, playpen etc. in gradual periods of time. yes he will cry but he has to learn that you do come back and it will be ok.
start out on a monday and put him down for 5 mins every hour.(tell him what u'll be doing during that time and reassure him that you WILL come back) then by the next monday add 5 mins to that and so on. YES IT IS PAINSTAKING AND TEDIOUS. but it works.
Now your 3 yr old is only time deprived...he is noticing that the baby is taking soo much time with you he may feel neglected and ignored(which is not the case) so he will act out, cry and immitate whatever the baby does to attract your attention.
During those 5 mins your baby is on the floor go play with our son, give him hugs or feed him a cookie or teach him how to entertain his little brother. because eventually that will help.
Make your son an important part of your life, the baby's life and
of the family!
2006-10-08 08:14:53 · answer #3 · answered by phoenixgirl21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try spending more time with them.
2006-10-08 07:57:12 · answer #4 · answered by MIKE 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋