I am happy for him because our relationship has long been over. However, I find myself feeling envious because I have struggled to find something long lasting and satisfying in terms of a relationship. It doesn't make sense to say this, but I was the one who instigated change and worked at improving myself and the marriage, which ended 2 years ago. He did nothing and so it ended. I am glad I am no longer married to him, as I was very unhappy. It feels unfair to me that I am the one who struggles with dating and has had some hard experiences with boyfriends, while he finds a relationship easily. Has anyone else experienced this type of envy? I would like to find the right guy myself and be happy.
2006-10-08 07:03:41 · 14 answers · asked by waterbaby 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is understandable because it is hard to see others move on and be happy. I was in a relationship for 2 years and I wanted out sooo bad, finally i broke up with him and was so glad i did, yet when i found out he had found someone i was envious. Its not an envy that you want him back but just the fact that you can't find someone. The strangest thing is though, when you stop trying to find someone the perfect person comes along. Don't look for love let it find you. Go out and have fun with your girlfriends, live the single life and you'll eventually find someone when you least expect it. If your searching for someone you will just end up settling for someone that isn't right for you just because you want to be in a relationship
2006-10-08 07:18:29 · answer #1 · answered by travelgrl85 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes I have been down that road.. after ten years of the up and downs I couldn't do it anymore.. a few months later he found a woman he thought was the best thing for him I was relieved based on I could move forward healing letting the past be just that,, He did marry her but after a year down the road it didn't work either..
I am glad I have inner peace knowing there are good loving men out there you just have to open your heart up enough to see and know when its real... don't rush into it.. I took three years off dating have fun and learning this new style of dating. Now I can settle down with the man that has my heart because I let go. and enjoy me for a healing period
2006-10-08 14:18:02 · answer #2 · answered by M M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been divorced for nine years, and we both have dated a lot afterward. The only difference now is that she is in a relationship that she loves and I'm still "struggling" myself to find someone. There are people out there for people like us, but we just have to dig deeper to find them. I hear and feel where you are coming from. Hold on to your dreams, and what ever you do, do not just settle for someone. Your life will begin one day; it's the waiting that sucks.
2006-10-08 14:45:54 · answer #3 · answered by lifescircle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been divorced for 12 yrs, and my ex husband h/b married twice in that time, and also had a live in girlfriend. One of the marriages lasted less than a yr. I just keep telling myself (friends have told me this also) that I don't need a man to make me feel complete or secure in myself. The fact the he has married twice sends a message that he is the insecure one and cannot take care of himself. Also, my ex mother in law passed away recently, and within 2 months my ex father in law had a g/f. They really can't take care of themselves. They are the weak ones!!
2006-10-08 14:24:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is always a danger, nag complain do not supply the sexual needs of ahusband then split..only to find your life is effectivley over. And you will inevitably put on the pounds and depression is ashort bus ride away. It is too late now, but next time do not listen to the religious nutters on here saying "Leave him, Anal Sex is for Satanists, You desrve better" Well you got what you deserved xx God Bless You
2006-10-08 14:11:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you put your own answer to it. You were not happy. You put the changes in place and you are still not happy. Ironic that it is still you who is having trouble with relationships.
Do you now suppose the problem was not his lack of effort?
Sounds like he knew he would move on and have no problem.
You on the other hand have still not figured out it might be you. Kind of had this coming didn't you?
2006-10-08 14:26:33 · answer #6 · answered by Flagger 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men always seem to move on faster than us. I don't really know why. But it's easier for them. We have to have time to heal and stuff. They find out soon that they can't live without a woman so they get in to a ltr. Just makes us the stronger sex! ;)
2006-10-08 14:14:12 · answer #7 · answered by queenblafalot 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just be patient....to find a Prince, you have to kiss a lot of frogs! There is someone out there for you, and he's searching for you just as desperately as you're searching for him. It takes some of us a long time to heal while others just move right on.....allow yourself to heal fully, then it WILL happen! Best of luck to you!
2006-10-08 14:19:52 · answer #8 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't worry about it too much....just be patience and you'll find happiness soon enough. Maybe there isn't enough good guys on the market so your search will just take longer.
2006-10-08 14:16:23 · answer #9 · answered by Tony 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wthing05 hit the nail on the head. Seriously, all hatred and feminist stuff aside, he's more on target then most of you are gonna be willing to admit....
2006-10-08 14:17:00 · answer #10 · answered by rwallace13 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋