fear of labour!!?

Question

ive got 5 wks 2 go and im panicking, will i definately get an Epidural? do they take all pain away? i keep watchin Birth stories and its makin me worse.then im scared there will be somethin wrong with the baby,havin a baby! stressful or wot?!?

Answer 1

It's normal to be scared, I think we all were! I got an epidural with my first and it took ALL the pain away, as a matter of fact I slept until it was time to push, then it was 3 minutes and 6 pushes and I had a beautiful baby girl. I was scared to death! Good luck and odds are with you that your baby will be perfect!

Answer 2

First, stop watching the birth stories...they obviously don't agree with you right now.
Second, you will more then likely get an epidural if you request it, and yes it takes all the pain away. You might feel some "pressure" but it is nothing you couldn't handle.
I won't lie, child birth hurts...alot. But it is also true that you do forget that pain once you hold that little baby in your arms for the first time....it makes everything all worth while!!
Even if, for some strange reason, you couldn't get your epidural, you can do it!! Woman had been having babies for thousands and thousands of years before the epidural came along.
You are stronger then you think.
And, all this worrying is completely normal and chances are, if something were wrong with your baby, you would know about it by now...so stop worrying, and try to relax...because you won't be doing to much of that for the next 18+ years or so!!

Good Luck!

Answer 3

Well to let you in on my story (I'll keep it short as I can) When I got pregnant with my son (who is now 2) i wanted to have a natural birth. I was all about it. Well his due date went by and 2 1/2 weeks later still no baby. I was almost 3 weeks late when my doctor said we would have to induce. I had Pitocin at 6 am, started labor at 8 am, intence back labor at 11am then the epidural at 3:30pm. The epidural did not work for me. I felt burning where the cathater was, only half of my body was numb and I had a really high temp durring the pushing (104.2). I vowed never to have one again. Then I got pregnant with baby #2 (she is 2 months now) I had to be induced again but this time I did not have the epidural. I will be honest that when you hit stage 3 of your labor it is intence but it only lasts for 30 min. When the baby starts to come our it burns and it comes with deep pressure. The contractions were 10x's worse then the pushing. If you relax and have GREAT support youi can do anything. If you whant to have a natural birth make sure you have a nurse that knows hows to handle it, because she will help you in more ways then one!!! Oh and to let you know my Daughter was 8.7 lbs. not a small baby but our bodies are made to take on such a wonderful thing... just let your body do the work not the hospital staff and remember every womens body is different so keep that in mind when reading other answers. I hope that helped in your dicision. Relax and enjoy everything now soon you wont have that option LOL Take care! TK

Answer 4

I understand where you are coming from. It's fear of the unknown. No matter how much you read it will be a new experience. You already know there will be pain but in my experience when the labor started I was so focused on the birth process that I felt that I was in another time zone. The time went fast. I am no warrior when it comes to pain. It's hard work but you are so focused. I had induced labor so it was extremely intense. I had discussed with my doctor before hand the epidural. These are great but you must labor awhile before they give you one as these slow labor. There are other pain medicines you can take. I had bad back labor and a hot pack helped for that. They will tell you that labor is nothing like cramps with your period. I found them the same but more intense. You will be able to rest between contractions. Don't try to be brave take pain meds when you need them and talk to your doctor Now about the epidural.
Remember our bodies are designed to labor and give birth. A good couch will help too. Especially one with a good sense of humor. If your significant other is to nervous to be a good partner then choose a close friend or relative. This is your show and you get to do as you wish. As far as the baby goes your worries are just starting. Your main mind set once the baby is here will be the baby. Is it warm enough is it fed enough where will it go to college and guess what as a mom those worries continue for the rest of your life but being a mom is a joyfull experience. You will be fine.
Yes epidurals take all the pain away. My legs felt tingly like they would if wearing woolen stockings. You can't move your legs but if uncomfortable the staff will move them for you. Remember the staff has been through this hundreds of times. I remember thinking how did they know I would like a pillow between my knees. You may feel pressure (with the epidural) as you push the baby out or with contractions but I didn't. I was embarassed as I would pee with contractions but this is normal you may poop a little too this too is normal. Don't listen to other womans horror stories as we are like men with fishing stories, our stories get worse and worse each time we tell them.lol
If they decide to do a C-section that is alright too. You will have a longer recovery time but the important thing is that the baby is out and healthy no matter how it is birthed. I am a mom and a RN so if you need a friend to talk to these last few weeks feel free to contact me through this site. Remember every first time mom is going through exactly what you are going through. You will be okay. Good Luck Honey!!!

Answer 5

I had a vaginal birth with my twins. My first children. I was also terrified of giving birth, I dont do well with pain. If you request an epidural they will give it to you. I was given one because I was induced at 37 1/2 weeks with preeclampsia. Unfortunately my epidural didnt kick in (not to scare you this is rare, the anestesiologist said he hadnt seen anything like this in 30 years) but if it does happen they will give you a shot of narcotics. I found that the contractions actually hurt more then the actual pushing of the babies out. One thing you should know, that nobody told me..an epidural is really just a painkiller for the contractions (same with the narcotics i ended up getting) you still feel the pressure and the baby being pushed out.
I doubt you will have complications with child birth, its pretty rare..I think the only complication that you should be aware of is that if you dont progress in your labouring you may need a c-section.
Dont stress, like I said its quick (I was actually pushing for a grand total of 25 mins and my babies were born 8 mins apart and I had 2 babies) You pretty much forget all about the pain and everything after a couple days..its pretty foggy for me.
Good luck and congrats!

Answer 6

Don't panic. The best advice I can give you is to be as well informed as you possibly can. Read magazines and books. Go to all your ante natal classes. Have a tour before the day of the maternity ward so you know where to go and where to park etc. The last thing you need is confusion at the last minute.

I had gas and air both times for my deliveries but it's each to their own. I understand that an epidural does take all the pain away but then you are entirely numb and feel nothing so it depends what you prefer. After all, no one gives you a medal for going without pain relief.

I think it's a good idea to discuss all the pain relief options with the midwife before hand and to have some sort of loose plan but not to be too rigid. If you keep your options as open as possible then you have more choice and will ultimately feel more in control. If you have a set hard and fast plan that you must do, if it doesn't work out that way you may feel out of control and even cheated.

Remember it's one day out of your life and at the end of it you will have a beautiful baby, unlike period pain which is a lot of pain for absolutely nothing. Also, if childbirth was so bad, everyone would be an only child. And spare a thought for women in less developed parts of the world who have no option but to go without any pain relief at all - makes my eyes water just thinking about it!

Good luck :-)

Answer 7

No question about it - giving birth is painful to say the least. It is normal to be scared - I was too. But it is also a very exciting and precious time. Your doctor will give you the pain medication that he thinks is best for you. I have three daughters, all born in the 60's. I had something called twilight sleep, which as far as I am concerned was a complete waste of time. I am sure that today doctor's and hospitals are much better equipped and knowledgeble as far as pain is concerned. They will never give you anything that will harm your baby. It is normal to be afraid, but trust me, you and your little baby will be fine. You will forget all about your pain when you hold your little one for the first time. It is a wonderful experience. I was afraid too because I did not know what to expect. You shouldn't look at those programs if they upset you. And not all women have a terrible amount of pain. My daughter had her first child and zipped right through it like it was nothing. Her second was not as easy because the baby was to big, but she still says it was a wonderful experience. Try to say calm, do just what your doctor's tell you and stop watching those birth stories if they are upsetting you. I hope that you will let everyone on this site know when you have your baby. God bless you and your little one.

Answer 8

Hello catwoman! Oh hun, all your fears are natural and the last thing you should do is panic right now. Epidurals do take most of the pain away in natural chilbirth but do leave you with some feeling so you can still have the urge to push! If you have a C-Section, your feeling is completely gone. Youre afraid that there will be something wrong with your little one....dont be. We all have these fears and you are not alone! having a baby is the most incredible moment in a womans life and I can gurantee you, the pain is soon forgotten once you have your bundle of joy.

Yes, it is stressful and difficult but there is nothing more rewarding and thats a promise....Bless you hun, thoughts and prayers xx

Answer 9

I've got nine weeks to go with my first baby (due Dec 8th) and I'm scared but I'm trying not to think about it too much.

I've stopped watching birth stories, they just scare me and my labour may not be as bad as the ones you see on TV as everyone is different.

I'm not planning on an epidural simply because I'm going to the local Midwife Led Unit rather than the Hospital (I am petrified of hospitals) - I have been advised to try and have a water birth with gas and air. There is no way I could spend 10 hours lying on a bed in a hospital with an epidural! I'm willing to try and work through the pain if it means I can go to the birth centre instead as a I will feel less scared there. I have been told epidurals can prolong your labour and that scares me as I hate hospitals so much theres no way I could cope with a long labour in one.

I know if things don't go to plan or I can't cope with the pain I'll have to go to the hospital and that scares me the most to be honest! Our local hospital is horrible - really un-homely, the labour ward rooms are like prison cells, totally uncomfortable, cold and sterile (none of this stuff about them being homely) and the staff are all rushed off their feet. Its horrible. The MLU is small and cosy and lovely so I am praying I'll be able to go there as I would never cope in a hospital.

Answer 10

Ok, all your feelings are normal, but in order to make the birth as easy as possible, you MUST gain control, remember that once you lose control, your baby is in danger. Breath through the pains and the midwives will give you all the help with pain relief you require or is sensible. Keep in your mind that the pain finishes and you'll have a reward at the end :) Good Luck and remember breath deep, oh a small hint, watch the monitor closely and breath the "laughing gas" as soon as the needle jumps alittle, then it will take effect before the contraction gets to the worse bit :)

Answer 11

I was exactly the same with my first baby. Now I'm 5 months and I cant wait to give birth. Everyone has a different pain threshold and every labour is different. I'm going for a home birth this time and its exciting. I watched all the birth programmes too, there is so much they don't cover.I felt the same as you do first time round and I can now say that its because whatever you watch and whatever your told its new and when you go in to labour you still don't really understand whats happening. Midwifes are fantastic, you and your baby will be fine.
Good luck xxx (and don't forget to post a message to let us all know that your labour was fine.)