i got married to my husband 9 yrs ago in city hall. we never got married by church. we plan to divorce since things have been going bad for us and there's no love in our marriage. for our kids we decided it's best since we dont want to put them thru anymore pain. i would like to know what can i do to get the divorce, how long will it take and is it the same or different from getting married by church? thank u!
2006-10-07 20:59:37 · 9 answers · asked by amanda h 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i just want to say thanks to all for the help and no im not in a hurry to get divorced i was just wondering what was the difference and as u can see i didnt get into so much details as to why we plan getting divorce, it's been really rough on us but i know we'll pull through. thank's for your good advices :)
2006-10-09 10:10:49 · update #1
i did say i want it but im having second thoughts now but we'll see what happens and take it one day at a time.
2006-10-09 10:13:23 · update #2
I am sorry for you guys have to divorce. But I don't think there's much difference whether you were married in a church or city hall when it comes to divorce laws. I have some information online and you might get from here if you live in California:
Here is the procedure. All the forms are online and you have to process all the paper work by yourself instead of to hire a lawyer. You will save money if you do it by yourself.
http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/selfhelp/family/divorce/step1.htm
Divorce
http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/selfhelp/family/divorce/get.htm
You also can go to the court house and get a divorce packet and if you are both in agreement it's cheaper and takes less time.
But by law, It takes six months to finish the case if everything is going fine.You have to list all the properties of you both have on the paper to follow the procedure. You can check online to find out the answers for how much property is to be divided, custody issues regarding the children, child support issues, whether you agree on everything or not. But make sure this is really what you want, 9 years marriage is a long time. Best of luck
2006-10-07 21:25:39 · answer #1 · answered by Marilyn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well there is no difference in the marriage from getting married in city hall then getting married in a church. However 9 years and kids why instead of divorce right away because you feel that you both have fallen out of love why not go to church now as a family take your kids put them in sunday school and go to counsoling through the church too many people jump to divorce because marriage changes in time and things are so different people change and grow in life you are married commited try and go to church commit to that for a while give it 6 months with counseling through them. Ask yourself what have I got to lose by trying it? You have been toegther this long 6 more months will not make it any worse but it might save the marriage. Good Luck and God Bless.
2006-10-08 07:15:49 · answer #2 · answered by hubbys2ndbest2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there's much difference whether you were married in a church or city hall when it comes to divorce laws. I'm sorry to hear things didn't work out. Depending on where you live, you can actually go to the court house and get a divorce packet and if you are both in aggreement it's cheaper and takes less time. But make sure this is really what you want, 9 years is a long time. Best of luck
2006-10-08 04:09:53 · answer #3 · answered by frustrated 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's not going to be a nasty divorce, you won't need an attorney and file "In Pro Per". You can go to the court house and ask for the family law facilitator, there you should be able to get the papers to file for your divorce (some even give classes on how to fill out the forms). After you file and serve the papers(need to be served by other person, not you), you will receive a case # and a date for a hearing. You will appear in front of a judge and tell why you want the divorce and what you want out of it. If there is no disagreements or fighting over the children (hopefully there isn't), you wont need to see a mediator. As for how long it takes, every state varies (California, 6 mo. after the court hearing without mediation, longer, until all disagreements are settled). But in total, usually about a year.
Good luck.
2006-10-08 06:34:47 · answer #4 · answered by Tawney 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce has nothing to do with the church, you go through the court. You each need to have a lawyer to represent you. If you have everything (such as child custody, child support, division of property) sorted out so there are no arguments, it should not take long.
2006-10-08 06:13:01 · answer #5 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No different Church or where ever. Divorce is got to go to court. It will take about a year and a lot of money.
You sound in a hurry. HHHmmmmm
2006-10-08 04:34:18 · answer #6 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's the same no matter where you got married. How long it takes depends on how much property is to be devided, custody issues regarding the children, child support issues, whether you agree on everything or not.
2006-10-08 04:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
divorce is a civil matter, not a church matter.
2006-10-08 04:05:20 · answer #8 · answered by casurfwatcher 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
really sorry for both
2006-10-08 04:04:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋