before i gave birth to my little girl, i had a loving and kind fiancee. He went over to England for 8 months (b4 i gave birth) to do a special study course. And when he came back and i had his baby he said to me 2 either pick him and put the baby up 4 adoption or loose him and keep the baby...
2006-10-07 16:55:02 · 29 answers · asked by Jess _New_Mommy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I dont now wat 2 do..
2006-10-07 16:57:15 · update #1
he said this 2 me a few days ago and now im scared that when im out he will come get the baby off my mom who looks after her while im out
2006-10-07 17:01:03 · update #2
Dump his ass, your baby should mean more to you than a low life bastard like him.
2006-10-07 17:00:25 · answer #1 · answered by Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥MzPretty♥ 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
No offense but you are one dumb s.o.b if you choose a man over your child that is your flesh and blood. You gave birth to that baby. If he doesn't want to be around you then tell him to f@#k off and that you'll be fine on your own. Another thing get a restraining order against him that way he can't come near you or the baby. Just remember your child will always be there for you a man more than likely won't be. If he can ask you to get rid of your child like it's an old outfit you can no longer wear then what is he going to ask of you next?
2006-10-08 00:57:28 · answer #2 · answered by rochelle s 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he may be a little green with envy that the baby is getting all your attention. However, I agree with the responses from the other people. Dump him and fast, but make sure you get child support, even if he never wanted the baby in the first place, he should have taken precautions 9 months ago, now he is legally responsible to provide financial support until the baby is 18.
2006-10-08 00:02:29 · answer #3 · answered by knittinmama 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do me a HUGE favor before you make up your mind...give yourself some TIME!
Hun you just had a wonderful little girl...and you are doing so good with her and trying so hard to be a mother.
You are in the middle of the most confusing, emotional and chaotic time since you have not even got your body back to pre baby hormone levels.
My sister used to tell me she'd cry when she saw the little teddy bear on the dryer sheet commercial and laugh for no reason. It's a horrible time while your body is trying to get back to some sort of emotional balance. Your also breastfeeding or trying too, which is going to make you react to things differently than you normally would too.
You still have to go through the "baby blues" and he is being a real beast for tossing this on you now. Some mothers go through the post partum period ok, others are severely depressed and a rare few can become suicidal or traumatized. Not able to care for themselves let alone their child. All has to do with the genetics unfortunately.
Hopefully you have your family, with your mom taking care of the baby, it gives you some time. But don't trust him to leave loose ends if he's being this selfish and hostile...please make sure that there is a report with the police that you feel threatened and fearful for your child. There are special restraining orders that will keep him from endangering your daughter.
If you've read the news, it isn't safe to think that it couldn't happen to you or your child...people can snap that you think are fine. He doesn't sound very nice right now, I'd make sure I'd stay with my mom with my child and keep away from him for now.
Give yourself time, you need to recouperate from this wonderful yet chaotic experience and then you need to take a hard look at your life right now. Who are the most important people in your life right now? (Don't you dare say HE is one of them...because he isn't just by the way he's treating you.. If someone truely loved you, they would NOT do this to you....EVER!!!)
Please, stay safe...keep your daughter safe and PLEASE stay with your mom or a family member that loves you and can protect you and watch over the two of you til you can get yourself clear headed again...YOUR daughter NEEDS YOU to be coherant and aware - clear headed and able to make real decisions...not emotional choices based on hormonal imbalance.
Bright blessings to you and your daughter.
2006-10-08 04:35:45 · answer #4 · answered by Darkkangel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So, you have a decision to make, do you think this a hole is worth putting your baby up for adoption? When you gave birth what name did you put down as "father"? Depending on what you put that could determin whether he has rights to the child while your mother is babysitting or not. If you didn't use his name then he has no claim to the child and even if he does take the child from your mother's care he can be charged with kidnapping. I strongly suggest you seek legal counsel in this matter that is IF you intend to keep the child and not ruin your life with this sht for brains man.
2006-10-08 00:09:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Loose him! A man with this kind of attitude is no good for you, he has drastically changed for the worst, don't look for it to get any better, he has become very cold hearted. Go now, before it is too late, if he feels this way he must not love YOU, or he wouldn't want you to give up his child. Think about it and I know you will do the right thing, your child didn't ask to be born and I'm sure she was conceived out of love.
Good Luck and keep the faith.
2006-10-08 00:14:02 · answer #6 · answered by Pam of Ga 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you haven't told your mother this or you wouldn't BE scared. WHY??? Do you want to give your baby up? If not ..why is this even a question to be answered? Why in the heck would you let a guy that would do something like that make decisions for you and your beautiful blessing? If you were to give the baby up...then what??? Suffer with THAT kind of person? If THAT'S what you want then PLEASE allow someone with a more stable mind raise her. The world doesn't need ANOTHER weak woman out there! Stand tall for yourself and your baby!!She's depending on you to! Bless you ,I pray you make the best DECISION for HER!!!
2006-10-08 19:31:15 · answer #7 · answered by Tumbleweed 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a mom now hon. That means you have a greater responsibility to your child than any other person. You need to be strong and tell this guy in no uncertain terms to get lost. If you go with this guy and leave your child I think you may regret it for the rest of your life - especially when he leaves you a few months/years later. Keep your child, raise her the right way and you will have no regrets. You can do it - all mothers who love their children are in your corner!!!
2006-10-08 00:05:01 · answer #8 · answered by Daisy 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
He's a jerk who doesn't deserve to be in your or your babys life. Keep your baby, there's nothing stronger than a mothers bond with her child. Sounds like your mom is there to help you, use her as your support system. You are all better off without him!!! Live your lives and don't worry about him.
2006-10-08 00:33:21 · answer #9 · answered by ktlauras 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First- get a restraining order against him. Second- tell your mom specifically- DO NOT let the baby go with him under any circumstances. Choosing between him and your child should be a no-brainer. There are lots of men out there- you only have one baby!!
2006-10-08 00:06:21 · answer #10 · answered by JustMyOpinion 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean you don't know what to do? If You want your baby than you need to get a lawyer and take him to court. If you don't than put the baby up for adoption.Is the dads name on the birth certificate? If not than he does not have much to stand on in court. Good luck.
2006-10-08 00:31:26 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋