My ex-boyfriend (and father of my 2 youngest sons) is now in prison for the acts of domestic violence he committed. Not only did he beat me, but he messed up my head BAD. It's gotten easier to deal with, but I am still trying to come to peace with this. How can someone who at one time claimed he loved us so much, do the terrible things that he did??? And why is it so hard to let go??? If anyone has an answer, I would greatly appreciate it!!!!
2006-10-07 14:26:54 · 6 answers · asked by vaasam 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
This is one of the most hardest things to ever have to deal with in ones life and I'm so sorry that you are going through this. It is hard to find the answers your looking for. The person you love today, you can hate tomorrow. Ones life can change in the split of a second. You must know that there is so much better out there for you. It is hard to get over this because you had such trust in this person that you shared a great part of your life with, and this is something that you will have to gain back, not just from this guy, but from everyone that is close to you. You have had something ripped from you. This is no mind playing game, this is your life and you can have the power to take over your life again. Please get the help that is out there for you. You have kids who you need to protect. You have each other and don't forget that these children need you now more than ever.
2006-10-07 14:46:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get some counseling and quick. I am serious, not trying to be mean, but real. You have got to get over this and realize that you are worth so much more. Obviously, he has given you the idea you cannot live without him and you have no self worth. Girl, get ahold of yourself. Ofcourse it is difficult you have chidlren together, however, do you want your chidlren either growing up and modeling his behavior or growing up and modeling yours. Go to a domestic violence agency or call they are listed in the yellow pages and they usually offer or can refer you to free counseling services by professional counselors who are able to assist women in your position and are non bias and non judgemental and many have been where you are in one way or another. please get yourself some help so you can be a better mother to your children. Get yourself emotionally healthy, and your chidlren will be better off in the future. Iam not saying you are a bad mother. But chidren learn by our examples and they model their relaationships in their future lives by what they see from us their moms. It isnt going to be easy, but take that first step and you will be glad you did. Start now. Ask God to give you the strength, you and your chidren deserve better. Of course it will hurt in the begining, however, in the end the outcome will be well worth it. You will be a much healthier you and will gain a self esteem and will not allow another man who dosent respect you in your life. Good luck to you, God Bless you and your family.
2006-10-07 21:41:37 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What he calls "love" is not what you should call love, it is abuse. You were attracted to him because you didn't know any better. Repeat to yourself "love does not hurt". Repeat it til you believe it. You have had a head job done on you. It's gonna take time to undo the damage. He hurts you because allow him to do so. You are a "victim" Don't return to the relationship. I don't care how messed up your head is. Think of the relationship as quick sand. It's dangerous just stay away from it. Do it for your kids. Think of them without a mother. I know cause I'm living it too. Thanks for reminding me.
2006-10-07 21:43:39 · answer #3 · answered by Spann M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain and I understand what you're going through. Mostly with what you're going through right now, it has something to do with how you still feel for him. That's why it's hard for you to let go. You're confused because he tells you one thing but does the opposite. But believe this, ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS. Think about it. Don't confuse yourself. You have to let go of your feelings for him. If not, you cannot move on. Think of your sons. They should be enough encouragement and inspiration to get your life going. Good luck.
2006-10-07 21:36:31 · answer #4 · answered by ~Amor~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consider that his stint in jail and injury to your head/heart and children the 'final checkmate' in the head game. That game is played out and time to move on. Best of luck to you!
2006-10-07 21:30:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
its hard because you believed all the bull sh!t they told you
2006-10-07 21:28:54 · answer #6 · answered by dvl_n_dskyz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋