Our children are at the same school. Every morning we see each other. The chemistry is frightening. I've been married for 11 years and I'm a complete mess. I can't sleep or get him out of my head. I'm tearful one day then over the moon. As time goes on the feelings are so strong - I'm dreaming of going off with him for ever! I wish I was single with no kids.
2006-10-07 12:41:10 · 23 answers · asked by Isabelle 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is a sign that you are not happy in your marriage. If you take further steps with this guy your marriage situation will only get worse and more complicated. So look at your marriage and see if you can make it work. It is essential that you include your husband into this process of developing a better marriage for yourselves.
It will be too hard to leave the kids and 11 years of your life behind. Turn to your family for support. This guy will also have big problems leaving his wife I'm sure. It mat be easy to get an affair out of it, but in the end it will hurt you both and your children.
2006-10-07 12:52:29 · answer #1 · answered by Snowflake 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all go through life having crushes on people whether we are married or not i bet theres moments when your husband has felt the same over someone.Theses feelings go as quick as they come,don't do anything stupid you have a family that will be blown apart if you do,get someone else to take the kids to school for a couple of days just make out your ill.Lust is a powerful thing but it doesn't last as long as a good marriage.Look at what you have believe me the grass isn't greener on the other side,next time you go to the school make a point of not looking for him,if you see him coming pretend you cannot see him.Please don't let this go any further and in a few months you will be so glad that you never.
2006-10-08 12:42:22 · answer #2 · answered by candyfloss 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please try and do something to take your mind off of him. So very difficult to do this.... been there worn that tee shirt.
My advice is you must or else you will lose everything you hold dear and cherish. And this is not any easy thing to live with believe me and you cannot turn the clock back on hurt.
Get over it.............please!
Perhaps you want to delete this message and forget you ever asked and go away and work it out for yourself. My heart goes out to you but do not do anything detrimental. If your marriage is that bad,,then things will take it's course naturally without any help from you.
You will end up becoming ill if you are not careful. believe me in this.
Talk to someone about it face to face and not on here. A true honest friend is what you need.
PS The grass is seldom greener on the otherside it's just that it may look as though it is.
2006-10-07 19:50:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say the chemistry is frightening, have you actually spoken to this guy? Doe's he feel the same? You have not really said in your question,so i don't really think it's my place to give you a direct answer. It's nice to have fantasies, once in a while, as long as that's all they are, you seriously don't wish you were single do you with no kids? I think you need to speak to a close friend and tell her where your head is at, and then take it from there.
Good luck
2006-10-07 20:41:58 · answer #4 · answered by classychick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard as it is, you should not see him again. Tell your husband how you feel, explain that you have problems in your marriage, which you do now, and then if you really want to save your marriage, find another way to get your kids to school. There really is nothing more destructive than an affair, there is often no way back, i speak from experience. Try this link, it might help show you where you need to work on your marriage, so this temptation doesn't rear it's head again.
2006-10-08 14:57:32 · answer #5 · answered by good tree 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you wish you were single then be single have a little respect for the man you have been married to for 11 years. And what kind of mother wishes she never had her children. They are not the problem you are. It sounds like you would trade your children for some man who has children of his own. Do you think he wishes he didn't have his children? You and only you decided to get married and have children.
2006-10-07 20:12:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww Isabelle, I think it is only because you find it exciting because it makes you feel, as you said, like a teenager again. It is a bit like the forbidden fruit..........isn't that the exact one you think you want. Look, if you love your husband and the life you have together, if I were you I would put all thoughts of romance out of my mind. Aren't we supposed to be adults now. Of course we will find ourselves attracted to someone else now and again, because being married doesen't mean we are dead. The difference is we are supposed to be able to control such attractions and not get swept away with our imagination. If you want a laugh about such feelings try and get a tape, or dvd if possible, of 'The Seven Year Itch' with Marilyn Monroe and Tom Bosley and you will see what I mean. Good luck.
2006-10-07 20:01:16 · answer #7 · answered by Learner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forbidden fruit always tastes the sweetest eh?
Problem is that so many affairs end up really hurting families and eventually the two people involved. You stand to lose a lot if you are wrong.
I suggest you see someone at relate. Just you, alone, to ensure that you are making the right choice. This decision could ruin your life and have it could have dreadful consequences.
Give yourself time to think this through. Divorce is so very painful for all involved. Please make sure you are certain before you jump!
2006-10-08 17:09:19 · answer #8 · answered by Nicola H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and LOVEGIRL are the same,you are both HOME WRECKERS,nothing more,nothing less.The guys you lust after are players,and you are being played...THEY know it-YOU don't.Anyone who wishes they did not have their kids is not worthy of having any.Get a grip,wise up,deal with the situation-you are a responsible married woman with children and a husband-you should not have married in the first place,let alone have kids.Other posts on here have some sympathy for you,i don't,you are a victim of your own selfishness,ditch the spanner and sort yourself out.
2006-10-08 13:03:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only reason you feel this way is because you know anything is forbidden. Think about it, do you REALLY wish you didn't have your kids? If you do then maybe they as well as their father are better off without you. So you have a choice, either you can continue to entertain this fantasy or you can step back into the real world and deal with what you have before you loose it all.
2006-10-07 21:53:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋