My wife is extremely jealous of any and every other woman that shows me any attention whatsoever. I love her with all of my heart and I make sure that I tell her and show her everyday, but it still isn't enough. I go to work and come home to her everyday,same time five days a week. I spend every weekend with her and I enjoy being with her, but her jealousy has been a major problem throughout our relationship. She believes that jealousy equals love. She thinks that since I'm not as jealous as she is, then I don't care about her as much as she cares about me. Does that even make sense? I don't think so! I don't know what else to do to show her that I love and want her. I've told her that her jealousy is pushing me away and she needs to do something about it. Is it my fault?
2006-10-07 12:21:34 · 12 answers · asked by wtf24 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Stop making her Jealousy YOUR Problem. It is NOT your fault. She is Insecure and has some serious issues to work through.
You need to tell her to start owning up to her Emotional and Mental defeciencies by finding out why she feels this way about you. Don't be surprised if she behaves this way with her friends. co-workers, even family.
This type of behavior will get worse if she doesn't get some type of counseling, either with a cleric, pastor, professional counselor even her family members.
Stop Enabling her by telling her how much you love her and doing EXACTLY as she expects, for you to bow down before her and MAKE her feel better about herself. The only person that can do that is her.
If the amount of love you have for her isn't enough, then she doesn't love herself enough.
2006-10-07 12:32:37 · answer #1 · answered by TexasKitty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy absolutely does NOT equal love. Jealousy is an insecure attempt to control a situation. Your wife might have some trauma in her past that makes her unable to trust, or she's so caught up in all the statistics regarding infidelity, and divorce, she cannot raise above all the crapola and realize she's ruining her own relationship with you. This could be a self fulfilling prophecy if she doesn't lighten up. Show her your track record of on time returns from work. Get her to realize it's been forever since you've spent time away from her. Even if you have to track it in a log book for a while. Then get her on this computer site and show her all the answers that say she's gonna screw things up if she doesn't lighten up some. Then ask her "Honey, why can't you trust me? I'm there for you always, you know that!" Get her to talk about whatever the cause of her jealousy stems from, and work out a solution. If need be see a counselor. Don't give up on her, fight for your relationship, just get her to do the same.
2006-10-07 12:47:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not your fault. Jealousy by any means is not love but a way to destroy it. Jealousy is a sign of insecurity and with a little help from a professional can be cured. You two may need to see a marriage counselor if you want to save your marriage. It will definitely be worth the time here as this is a major problem in a marriage but is completely treatable and Id advise to do it soon, Just go into it with a open heart and mind. You would be attending more to be of support and shown how to assist her to overcome her insecurities. Good luck
2006-10-07 12:37:02 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing can ruin a relationship faster than jealously.
Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous. Jealousy will often change to the non valiant abuse.
Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts untrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive.
Jealousy comes about because of the insecurity of the jealous person and the jealousy may or may not have foundation. This person is afraid of hidden communication lines and will do anything to try to uncover them. She might need counseling to improve her self esteem.
Do not blame yourself, just try to convince her to get help, which maybe tough task.
2006-10-07 13:42:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thought that went through my head when I read your question is has she been cheated on in a past relationship? Or has some guy treated her like crap in the past?If so...then I know what she is going through...and I know how it makes you feel not to be trusted. You say that you love her with all your heart...and you must or you would have just walked by now. Everyone has some "baggage" that they take with them into a relationship...and I can tell you that IF she has been cheated on by a other guy in her life...its REALLY hard to EVER trust someone again. About all I can tell you is hang in there...and keep trying to reassure her that YOU are NOT going to hurt her...jealousy is a HARD think to live with...for both you and her. I am sure that she thinks after she has accused you of something....what the hell am I doing....but its too late she said it and your hurt. Talk to her.
Best of luck
2006-10-07 12:43:18 · answer #5 · answered by oldman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is it....jealousy equals low self esteem on her part. That or she doesn't place any faith in your love and commitment. She is the one that has the issues if in fact what you're saying is the whole shebang.
Keep it up and the jealousy smothers the other person. To the point where you begin to dread having contact with members of the opposite sex because either a scene will be made or worse...you'll have to listen to her b*tch and make your life miserable by being angry with YOU.
If she says she'll change...it won't happen over night. She has to be able to believe that not every woman is on the make. Although please God...just for one week...a miracle please.
2006-10-07 12:35:34 · answer #6 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The first question is: Have you done anything that caused this behavior or has it been like this since the beginning?
If this is just the way she has always been and you really love her, get professional help because there might be a root problem to this.
2006-10-07 12:37:02 · answer #7 · answered by gil 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy never ='s love! jealousy will be the quickest thing to destory love! come back on an tell us when you have had enough...jealousy makes me f'ing sick!
2006-10-07 12:26:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
jealousy is caused by loving someone too much
2006-10-07 12:23:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Suggets to go see a therapist together... maybe this comes from something from her childhood..
2006-10-07 12:58:04 · answer #10 · answered by Tina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋