10/13 will be our 6 year anniversary. We have together two beautiful children, 20 month old son and a two month old daughter plus a house we bought two years ago. I still have not been asked..he tells me in a couple years but when will that be? Am I asking to much? I am scared that he doesn't want to get married. I do. I am thinking he may not want to, just yet...incase he meets someone else? I am not sure....what else would it be? Just recenlty his best friend got married and then his wife cheated on him. Is he scared? Does he think this will happen to him? A question I ask myself...or is it me? Does he really love me?
Please help me define my ?? I will be 25 and he is 26.....
2006-10-07 11:26:07 · 11 answers · asked by butterflyangel1013 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do you think that if he marries you, neither of you will ever have to worry about finding love outside your relationship again? Do you need marriage as reassurance that he loves you and none other, and will stay with you? If you do, don't get married.
I am not religious and therefore not too keen on marriage myself, but I don't think it's a weird idea to want to be with someone until the day you die. Perhaps he feels the same, perhaps he'd loathe throwing a big bash while not believing in marriage - but he might still believe in your relationship. So, if marriage is important to you, tell him why..
Also, you are 24, soon 25.. You have a very long life ahead of you. Why settle down as much as you can? I promise my girlfriend I'll never settle forever, and I'll never marry her, but I'll always love her and I hope to be with her forever.
2006-10-07 12:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by McAtterie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell but it just aint gonna happen. If a man has as much time and kids with a woman as he does with you and hasnt married you, its not going to happen. Hes enjoying his current life just the way it is with no intention of changing it like getting married, for whatever reason. Maybe its just in case he does meet someone else, but not knowing if you live in a community property state or not, should he split up with you, the law will award you custody, child support for both children and possibly the house. No spousal support though, so being single wont help him here. After all he has all the responsibilities and luxories of being married but only without the committment so the actual aspect of being married wouldnt change a thing from what you have currently but w/o the rings. Hes not scared because he wouldnt stay now,so it must be in case of a break up. Good luck
2006-10-07 11:39:23 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He shouldn't be too scared. I never understood that about men. Having children is a bigger commitment than marriage.. But see marriage is thought to be a ball and chain, and if it don't work out you can always be a baby mama, instead of x wife gettin alimony and child support. But why would you let time pass you by that you would want a ring when you got kids and a house? I don't blame you for wanting getting married, but you did it kinda backwards. He's not going to be as quick to jump the broom because of that. Maybe if you would've asked him that before the kids or after the first one... But as more time passes on, most likely he won't. I know someone that was together for 13 years 4 kids and no marriage... I guess they was ok with shacking up. But they messed arouind on each other too. But hopefully your situation ain't all dysfunctional like that. I don't think it's about love, I think it's about comfort. He's comfortable with the situation so he might just be like hey we common law, so what's the difference? Talk to him about it. Because if you making it an issue than you need to consider if you are going to present an ultimatum or just let it ride out and leave things as is...
2006-10-07 11:35:49 · answer #3 · answered by Dr. PHILlis (in training) 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's 30 and you have already talked to him and you have been together 3 years, I surprisingly doubt a concept is going to ensue. perhaps he's not the dedication style of guy. i might perhaps provide it yet another 12 months in case you think of there is a few threat he must be goofing you and he's going to advise on 15 August 1945, yet once you do wait a 12 months and it does not ensue, circulate away him. i'm 23 and that i've got a three 12 months shrink with this one. If it does not ensue then at 26-28 it is an 18 month shrink and at 28-29, this is a one 12 months shrink. Then after that i'm only going to forget approximately approximately marriage and have young ones myself.
2016-10-19 00:02:24 · answer #4 · answered by corl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 26 and my boyfriend is 33. We have been together for almost 10 years, and we are not married. Why? Well, what exactly would be the point? You already have kids and are obviously committed. Unless he give you a reason to worry - ie: he comes home with lipstick on his collar or something... Gay people can't get married and they do just as well in relationships as anyone else. Why bother getting married?
2006-10-07 11:31:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should he marry you? he has all the benefits of marriage without the responsibility. Anytime he wants he can toss you and your kids out on the street. happened to my daughter, she had an engagement ting and after over 10 years he dumped her and their kid and she had nothing. You girls fall for these players out of "love" there is no love, just playing and you thinks he loves you. If he did he'd marry you.
2006-10-07 11:51:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You made the mistake of staying with him and having his children before getting married and before he proposed. You have put the cart before the horse. Forget about getting married and pray he doesn't leave you.
2006-10-08 04:46:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there you go you already have children why should he marry you when he can get it for free. Sorry don't mean to sound so crude but come on.
2006-10-07 11:29:12 · answer #8 · answered by Right Wing Extremist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he doesn't want to marry you...why did you stick around so long?
2006-10-07 15:02:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he can not and will not commit....he has everything now without the commitment...take the strong road and dump him...be strong and find a man that will commit...he sound like a LOSER
2006-10-07 12:13:02 · answer #10 · answered by Vanessa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋