I am confused and mad. Yesterday was my birthday and I told my husband last week what I wanted?

Question

It was not expensive at all. So yesterday he called to tell me he was going to the store, I told him to pick me up because he spends alot of money and I don't want it if it is expensive. So he came home and we went to two stores, but it was expensive and I got turned off at the vendors, so I said forget it.
Now I am pissed off the more I think about it. He should have gotten the gift a few days ago and not running around on my birthday to find it. I told him a few days ago where to go and even gave him a picture of it.
So another birthday has gone by and nothing. Every year it seems to be the same thing. Today I figured he would go to the store before he got home and pick it up, but nothing.

Am I right for being pissed off? I know I suggested going with him, but the more I think about it, that was dumb on my part.

Answer 1

First of all...happy birthday
Now lets dissect your behavior for a minute.
you tell your hubby what you want for your birthday?Why?Don't you like surprises?
And why are you complaining about something being "expensive".You get turned off by not being in charge of the spending or the gift.
This to me seems like a control issue on your part.
Presents are so much nicer when it is the unexpected,and if you tell your husband year after year what you expect , why in the world don't you go and get the "present" which you demand ,yourself.
Give the guy a break , he means well ,and year after year you put him down.So why should he put any effort into giving you a gift you demand.
Get over it and grow up.

Answer 2

Happy birthday! Today's my birthday...birthdays can be so disappointing, especially to us women. I think men don't think to much of birthdays, I wonder if it has to do with our being able to give birth. Because, my husband isn't a big birthday person either. But he did take me to lunch, and got me a t-shirt I had wanted. Spending time with me today, was my real gift.

Honey, you have a right to be upset, but it seems to like you just need to buy your own gift, and make him take you out instead. Some people just don't think about gifts and presents, it's just not their style. You may have one of those, so instead of always being disappointed every year, just ask him to take you out, that way he doesn't spend your birthday in the dog house. Make him take you somewhere fancy, and you have to get all dressed up, and he has to wear a tie. Threaten him with the "date" from hell, and say"Honey, instead of buying me some old present, you can just take me out to eat, and dancing..and please wear that tie that your Aunt June came you for Christmas last year..you know the one I am talking about the one that has snoopy on it." Or tell him instead of the gift, that you had asked for, you want to have a family get together, and you want to invite all this very favorite people. I bet he will put those shopping shoes on,and finds the right thing next year! Happy birthday!

God bless us all................

Answer 3

The only person you should be mad at is yourself, you shouldn't have gotten involved in his decisions on what he wants to give to you on your birthday. If you're worth a million dollars in his eyes, you shouldn't be mad, instead you should have been grateful because some women are not lucky enough to have a man that admires them so. now you've hurt his feelings and your feelings are hurt also. Next year, just remind him and don't get involved in his decision making about what he wants to get his wonderful wife for her birthday

Answer 4

It sounds like your hubby is a little self-absorbed. You need to sit down and talk with him (not TO him) about it. Talk calmly with him and stay away from the accusing tones and words (like you did/didn't do this...). Explain to him how hurt you were that he didn't get what you wanted for your birthday. If this doesn't work, then maybe you should consider seeing a therapist. There are obviously other factors in play here.

Answer 5

Sorry to butt in, but you asked for a (insert thing), and didn't get (insert thing). Ok. Well, get over it.

Is he doing other things that are thoughtful?

I got my wife flowers a few months ago and was yelled at on the phone. No flowers for a while. Got her a card a few weeks ago, was at least thanked.

We bought IPODS. Was nice my wife put some stuff on it.

My wife has in the past bought for me for Christmas or birthday (insert thing) here. That was nice I used (insert thing) but then got bored with it. Don't ask for (insert thing) anymore. Just for people to want to talk to me.

Answer 6

I wouldn't have asked to go with him, but don't beat yourself up about it. Mistake is made and its over. Yes, wouldn't it be wonderful to have a birthday gift every year and such. And now you're mad but wouldn't you rather just be happy with being with your husband. Just go out and get something for yourself and call it a day. No worries!

Answer 7

I think you should accept whatever he wishes to give you, expensive or not.
It probably would not be an issue if you just let him buy the gift he wanted to give you.

Answer 8

do you even understand yourself???
do you want it or not?

you have this poor guy confused no wonder you don't get anything - and no you shouldn't get mad go buy your own gift if you are going to be upset all the time!!

Answer 9

i might want to have lengthy gone on your party and gave you me as a latest and back the praise that you gave me as i strongly undergo in concepts one time a large number of mr nobodys coming to mine ..i by no skill did understand why i had a large number of nutrients left over that evening lol

Answer 10

do the same thing in return when his birthday arrive. u will see how he gonna feel. then let that chance to talk to him what u felt on your past birthday.