My boyfriend and I have been together for ten months. We have both told each other that we love the other. He recently told me that he does not love me but still cares about me a lot. He begged me not to leave him Should I dump him? Please help.
2006-10-07 09:37:52 · 17 answers · asked by star 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Star,
Find out what his definition of love is.
His love for you probably developed into a deeper, more meaningful love and he doesn't know what to call it.
The fact that he cares about you and still wants you around is a big plus.
2006-10-07 09:43:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you two need to have a heart to heart talk. Find out what made the feelings just seemingly go away. The most important thing is by now the relationship should be serious enough that he should have no problems saying i love you if he has in the past. You need to decide if are willing to wait around for him to make up his mind. You should not have to put your life on hold because he can not decide if he loves you or not. Consider your own feelings and stay true to yourself. Make yourself happy. If this is not what you want then leave him. Maybe a short break up is what he actually needs to figure out his feelings for himself. If you two split there are plenty of guys out there and I'm sure someone else that will make you happy and give you the emotional support that you need. Don't be his stepping stone honey. Do what you feel is right for you and no one else.
2006-10-07 16:46:45 · answer #2 · answered by DaRkViXeN 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is protecting himself from getting too involved. He probably does not even know what he means by love. Before you decide to dump him, maybe the two of you should see a counselor for a few sessions to sort things out. Without knowing more about you, I would not be able to recommend anything more specific. If your community has a family service agency, you could try there for low cost. Or if you have an employee assistance program where you work, that would also be a good place to start for free.
2006-10-07 16:42:52 · answer #3 · answered by doctoretty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well after he said that he doesn't love you anymore and the feelings aren't there doesn't that mean he doesn't feel the same way as he used to? What did he expect to happen? Did he actually think things would just continue as the were after he told you so? When a girl hears those words he automatically thinks that the guy is trying to break up with her, and I would think the same. If you say you love him as you claimed, then you wouldn't be on Yahoo! Answers asking other users for their opinion because it shouldn't matter. If you really loved him, you wouldn't be able to do anything but stay with him as he begged you to not leave him. Not only because he asked you not to, but also because you can't bare to do it. Don't pay attention to any other answers that anyone says and just ask yourself if you want to be with him or not.
2006-10-07 16:43:41 · answer #4 · answered by Liliac 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you dump him for being honest? He apparently got caught up in the moment when he used the L word and had second thoughts. It takes a big person to admit to mistakes, so don't punish him for that. Love takes time, think twice before you dump a good man.
2006-10-07 16:43:30 · answer #5 · answered by mad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well u have to think about that. If he doesn't love you, you might could build up to it but if he isn't going to love you, can you REALLY have a relationship with him? It sounds like you guys should just be friends- that way u wouldn't "leave him" and u'd still chat and just "care" but not "love" each other
2006-10-07 16:39:59 · answer #6 · answered by ♥#1 Miley Cyrus Fan♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As the song goes... You can't make his heart feel something it don't. There are many kinds of love and caring is a kind of love, but not a romantic kind. If romantic is what you want... it's not with him. Stay friends if you think you can, but don't stay with him thinking his feelings might change. It will only cause you pain in time.
2006-10-07 16:47:17 · answer #7 · answered by valerie b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's the point on being together if he doesn't love you? Sounds like he's willing to hold on to you for the sex, but not for the love. This would be a useless relationship for you. Overtime, the relationship would just make you miserable.
2006-10-07 16:43:03 · answer #8 · answered by melcar12345 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you want to marry a man who doesn't love you? How is he going to answer to the wedding vows when the pastor put the question to him? He would be lying if he said he will love and cherish you til death do you part. Do you want a liar for a husband?
2006-10-07 17:16:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he dont love you in ten months he never will. The choice is yours as to whether to leave or not.
2006-10-07 16:40:40 · answer #10 · answered by jamz2277 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋