My Husband thinks he owns me, when I am mad at him and tell him that we are not going to be making love that night... he says "I don't have to ask you for it, I'll just do it when and how I want to". He thinks he can have me anyway he pleases even when I am not interested.
2006-10-07
07:08:21
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19 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
I tried talking it out with my husband, last night... I explained to him that; sometimes I am just not in the mood to make love. But, he still doesn't seem to care about anything I said to him. Instead, he told me that I do not love him, since I don't want to make love when he wants to. Does that make sense??!? I mean, don't my feelings mean anything? I am soo confused.
2006-10-10
14:40:03 ·
update #1
Besides this, does he allow you to go out with friends or he wants you to stay away from your friends and just be with him?
There are two ways to deal with control freaks. One is you are strong enough to show him you are not under his control whatsoever. You are not a kid, you know what's right thing to do, what's not, however, you can image this will bring you arguments often. The other way is you want to save all argument process, you "obey" all he said, he will be happy, but how long this marriage can last???
Some men are just stubborn, cannot change them, probably wait until they are 50+, you will start seeing some changes.
2006-10-07 07:20:49
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answer #1
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answered by Mochi 3
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why aren't you interested? is it because he is so demanding? why did you marry him? these are all questions you should have asked before you married him- he does own you in a manner of speaking- your married to HIM- but I do not think he should be so cruel- and that is what it sounds like- treat him the way you want him to treat you- try being sooo nice to him- try it it works- it may take awhile - but I know it works- he is your husband that was your choice now work out the details girl
2006-10-07 07:37:49
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answer #2
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answered by drox 3
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I was also in a relationship like this and I had to leave. It was a very difficult decision but when a man doesn't respect you sexually, he doesn't respect you, period. I have listed a web site for you that lists the signs of an abusive relationship. Please read it and take it seriously. You are a person of worth and you deserve to be loved and respected in a healthy manner.
2006-10-07 07:39:40
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answer #3
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answered by Christy 2
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It sounds like to me you had him trained that way. When i say trained that means you put yourself in that perdicument to be treated that way. Before you married him didn't you see the signs there before you said i do? You need to really show him that you are serious about what you say.and when he come's back to you with some type of mind game's be ready to throw a dart right at his answer and don't back down. And also don't tell him what your going to do. show him that you are not playing with him
2006-10-07 07:35:33
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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sounds as if he also wants total control over you , not a good thing , he deffinetly has some issues . and how far he trys to take things , if you can't resolve this be aware that things may go down hill ,. control can be an early sign of coming abuse . hope you can work it out before things go bad
2006-10-07 07:17:42
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answer #5
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answered by crazy_ol_hippie_radical 6
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First of all - don't use sex as a weapon. Just tell him you are "Not in the mood". It's a control thing and you can better control him by not threatening. Secondly - as a control freak - he is going to get worse and worse. I know - I was married to one. Get rid of him now!
2006-10-07 07:27:10
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answer #6
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answered by Lioness 5
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not have to ask you for sex? do it when and how he wants? i would get out now before he ends up raping you! yes, husbands do rape their wives! when you say no, that is what it means..even if it is your husband! i think he will end up being emotionally and physically abusive. with control freaks like him, there is no way to tell him he doesn't own you, because he thinks otherwise.
2006-10-07 07:26:07
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answer #7
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answered by sweet serinity 2
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even though he is your husband ,it is rape when you don't want sex with him and he enforces it on you,sounds like your just hisdoll and he can do whatever he wants with you. you are a human being please don't let him treat you this way .he does not in anyway own you ,remind him when you married him you just signed a piece of paper to have his last name ,not to be his slave.and also remind him they also have those papers for divorce. start standing up for yourself to him he's not god, he's selfish. no is no tell him,and he is pushing you away.
he needs to show you respect and to start treating you as a human not a dog.
2006-10-07 07:39:24
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answer #8
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answered by smiley 4
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Guy seems to have MAJOR possessive issues. He sees you as a item and not as a wife. In your vows they took out the obey part. Sounds like you need to leave him before things get dangerous.
2006-10-07 07:12:08
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answer #9
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answered by redsnowykitten 3
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Nobody owns you!!! You can do whatever u want to do and whatever makes u happy, if i were u i would kick this dumb *** to the kurb and start over.. he is treating u like his little puupet , u dont have to do things that people tell u do to.
2006-10-07 08:08:22
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answer #10
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answered by meg 2
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