I am a married woman (currently separated) and am in love with a divorced man I work with. He has told me several times that he feels the same way. We went out on a date last night, and had a fantastic time. He was such the gentleman that he did not take me home to his house, he brought me home to mine, kissed me goodnite, and went home. He has sent me numerous e-mails telling me how much he loves me, and can't get me out of his mind. I told him the same. I think about this man, 24/7, and it always brings a smile to my face. We are so relaxed, comfortable, and can be ourselves when we are with each. He has been divorced for 12 years, and I have been separated for about a month. My husband is very judgemental and critical of me. Granted, he has given me everything i've always wanted, but makes me feel guilty about it. I need to know what to do with my current situation. Do I get a divorce and follow my heart?
2006-10-07
05:36:45
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12 answers
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asked by
Verge
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in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
do as you like.
2006-10-07 05:39:04
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answer #1
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answered by prince47 7
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If you have only been separated a month and not divorced I surely would give myself a good bit of time before I did anything drastic. How long have you been married? If it were me I would go very slow because you are probably emotionally on a roller coaster considering how nice this person is. I would want to know why this man was divorced.
2006-10-07 05:46:19
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answer #2
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answered by Diane H 2
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If you are not divorced from your husband, you should not be dating another man.
Just what in the world do you expect from this divorced guy if you happen to marry him after you divorce your husband? You think he's is going to cherish you more for you having run around on your husband by dating him? Or, is he going to wonder who you are going to run around with later?
Make a decision -- divorce your husband and then date other people, or stay married to your husband and date him.
2006-10-07 05:52:55
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answer #3
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answered by asperens 2
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You've only been separated for a month - give it six months - really get to know the other guy. Then get a divorce - then keep going out with the other guy for AT LEAST another six months...see how things go. Morals of the story: don't get caught in the 'grass is greener' thing and be careful about being on the rebound.
Good Luck!
2006-10-07 05:41:02
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answer #4
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answered by RT 5
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I think people are confusing top priority to the childs basic needs. Your Marriage and Husband are first, with children a very close second. You see, making your marriage the top priority doesnt mean neglecting your kids. You still show them all the love in the world, you still feed them and provide for them , you still make sacrifices for their well being. But, if your marriage isnt first, then it'll fall apart. Thus the family unit being broken and leaving your children as a statistic. This is why your marriage comes first. It should be sacred - so many children come between marriages, its because they are given the wrong priority. Teach your children the value of marriage, dont teach them to put their life partners second once they pop out babies. Children come , grow and go. And the only one there for you always will be your partner. Dont put eachother second.
2016-03-18 06:04:57
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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Get your divorce...then decide what you want to do. You're lonely now, and thinking with your heart. Wait until the divorce is final, and then you can think more clearly. After that, by all means, follow your heart!
2006-10-07 05:43:13
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answer #6
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answered by olderbutwiser 7
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If you can fall in love with someone other than your spouse, then you are not married to the right person. If you decide to divorce, don't do it for any other man, do it for yourself.
2006-10-07 05:39:21
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answer #7
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answered by T Time 6
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I see mulitple issues here, sweetie. You are having a "fantasy romance" right now. How can you tell someone that you "love them" when you don't even know them. Having a "fantastic time" on a first date does not qualify for anything. He is setting you up for the "kill".....you are vulnerable right now and he wants to have sex with you. Think about it......."fantastic time....telling you he "loves you".....gentle kiss good night, then leave......you are a prime set up candidate and..you are still a married woman. You need to back off of everything and go to counseling to figure yourself out. Trust me, this is not the solution to your problems. If you continue with this "wonderful man".......you are setting yourself up for more problems that you can ever imagine. Don't make me tell you "I told you so".......figure yourself anfd your life out first. If this man truly "loves you".....then he will be more than willing to wait for you...........sweetie!
2006-10-07 05:43:55
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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Gurl U better follow your dreams and don't listen to your other man that U divorce
2006-10-07 05:40:22
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answer #9
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answered by Asheypooh 4
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i think if you have kids you should think more about it but if you don't go with it. i mean if he makes you feel happier and more loved then your husband and you know you life wil be better with him then it is with her.
2006-10-07 05:40:21
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answer #10
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answered by Tanya B 1
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You have not mentioned the most critical factor of all.....do you have children with your husband?
2006-10-07 05:44:06
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answer #11
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answered by lofolulu 3
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