i am married and have 3 kids im 20 the guy im married to iv been with for 4 years my oldest child's father is in a relation ship with another women but is not married me and him get a long great we dont fight like me and my husband do he has told me the only reason he says with her is because he does not want to break up another family like he did with us but he wants me to be friends with ben.. but i dont want to i do have feelings for him and things with me and my husband are not the greatest now what should i do please some one help me should i stay with my husband and try to make things work out longer or should i tell my sons father that i dont want to be friends with ben.. if i leave my husband for him then he better leave his girlfriend i was much happier with him
2006-10-06 19:30:02 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I had a read through your previous questions to try to get a better understanding of your situation… You don’t explain yourself very well, and I’m not too sure I have got things right or not…
From what I can gather, your husband has a job, but you feel he is really ‘lazy’ and just plays the xbox.
“iv tried to talk to him he just sit on the xbox and yes he has a job but iv ask him to watch the kids why i work 2nd shift we can not afford a babysitter he wont do it the he yells at me because all i do is stay at home with the 3 great little boys i have 4 2 and newborn its hard to be a teenmom he just dont understand”…
I could read that sentence fifty times and still not understand what you mean !!!
You mentioned in an earlier question that you want to tell your husband to get out, but don’t know how…
According to you, your husband sits on his butt playing the xbox, and doesn’t help at all with the kids; and that he is a ‘slob’ and doesn’t pick up after himself.
You mentioned also that the oldest child is not your husband’s !
You have been married to your husband for four years, and are mother of two of his children…
I don’t know if I have missed something somewhere, but I am having trouble figuring out who “Ben” is !!!… Is Ben your husband?
You haven’t explained why you and your ex broke up…
Obviously things weren’t going as well for you then as what they are now, otherwise you and he would have stayed together.
I can only suggest to you that you and your husband need to seek counselling; and that you should not allow yourself to get ’sexually’ involved with your ex.
You have three beautiful children, and irrespective of who their natural fathers may be, you are their mother, and you owe it to them to try to make things work in your marriage !!!
2006-10-06 19:31:47 · answer #1 · answered by I_C_Y_U_R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When u got married, u gave your vows for better or worse. Well this is the 'worse" part of your marriage and common sense should tell u to work it out before giving up so easily. Your ex is already in a relationship himself and he has told u that he's not going to leave because he doesn't want to break up a family. U should respect his decision and worry about your own marriage.
2006-10-06 19:35:04 · answer #2 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't explain you self very well. And 3 kids by age 20. you must have dropped out of school. That explains your grammar. Also look like the type of people you associate with are bums. Be romantic with your husband and make your marriage work. 1. encourage him. 2.treat him like a king and in return he will treat you like a queen. 3. when he comes home you need to be looking good.
2006-10-07 03:10:30 · answer #3 · answered by white dove 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would leave if.... if you can sort out the things that drove you too apart. Life is hard together and the guy you aren't living with always looks cleaner nicer more in love with you. Think it over if you think you've been really truly missing the love of your life go for it you already know this would be great for your son.
2006-10-06 19:39:17 · answer #4 · answered by esoreinna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
20 with 3 kids and trying to decide which man.
what about the kids. is foster care better while you decide. love them first. let the rest go. do what is right for the kids, no battle, just love.
at 20 you need to know you first.
2006-10-06 19:37:18 · answer #5 · answered by sllyjo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try using puncuation. It makes reading this thing a lot easier. Stay with your husband and try to make it work.
2006-10-06 19:38:42 · answer #6 · answered by sdo3lg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something happen between you ad your ex for him to be your ex. Marriage is ups and downs. You should not be thinking about getting with your ex, you should be thinking about how to fix this relationship. Jumping back and forth isnt going to help.
2006-10-06 19:43:42 · answer #7 · answered by timidlady2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop!! Analyze your feelings and what you want in yur life, think about the children is a part of it but remember, you are a huge part of it.
2006-10-06 19:34:19 · answer #8 · answered by firebird 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay and make the marriage work out.
2006-10-06 19:33:14 · answer #9 · answered by Desert Sienna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump your husband and find a better guy
2006-10-06 20:01:00 · answer #10 · answered by John H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋