To all those SEPARATED or were separated? What are the odds that you get back together w/ your spouse?

Question

Does separated usually mean you're taking time off? Or just can't divorce yet because of kids?

Answer 1

Separation means what it means to you. It means many things to many people.

The odds of you and your spouse getting back together is based on how selfish each of you are and how willing each of you are to work on your problems.

Answer 2

I would say most seperations end in divorce since typically one or both parties are NOT interested or willing to attempt repair and reconciliation.

That being said my spouse and I seperated for a few months and I seriously thought it was over for good. However he kept reaching out trying to get me to relent on 'another try' and eventually the changes I saw and could no longer attribute to 'short term' behaviour made me think twice.

Thankfully we made the commitment to try and one of our conditions was honesty and communication. Just like many couples we were misunderstanding each other and feelings were hurt due to a simple lack of our ability to ASK or state what we felt.

I don't think any couple should stay married because of children. If one or both parties is truly unhappy then the entire family will be unhappy and dysfunctional and this is a far worse environment to grown up in then having divorced parents who find happiness apart.

Answer 3

Well if your are separated once then there is a chance of getting back together. But the second time usually means enough is enough. I have been separated for about four months now and there is no way I would even think of getting back with my ex eventhough we have a son together. If you are miserable there is no need to fake anything even under certain circumstances.

Answer 4

I have been "separated" from my husband for 7yrs. now, but we are both in relationships and will never get back together, just haven't legally divorced yet. Usually if you get to the point of needing to separate, it's pretty much over to me. Guess it all depends on the situation.

Answer 5

When I separated I was very confused with two young children from the marriage. Everytime we made attempts to mend, it never worked. The same problems continued to exist and it only became worst. Staying with him would have caused more harm in regard to the children.
I hate to say it but when its over, its over. Especially if the hurts can be forgiven but not forgotten. I am divorced. I have been divorced sense 2003, in 2006 we have began to communicate respectfully due to our having children. If we had no children, I would not speak to him in passing. I was married for 7 years. Good luck.

Answer 6

it means the kids cant bare the divorce yet usually or no one wants to be the one to pay for the divorce... Id say 98% of the people who separate divorce.

Answer 7

I've been married for 30yrs. In the last 8 years we have been seperated 4 times. She even filed divorce papers the 3rd time. I now wish that we would have ended it the first time and ended the prolonged agony. Good luck

Answer 8

there are no odds, it all depend what is in your hearts. and if it was meant to be. don't force it and if you feel as though u want to get back with your spouse give that person time to think and if they feel the same way maybe one day it will happen. but a good trick to always know is, never be forceful. give that person time to miss you and see what it's like to be without you, they will either like it or hate being away from you. but as long as you press the issue, it may never happen. be patient, good luck.

Answer 9

The odds of getting back depend on what caused the split in the begining but the problem is making it work in the longrun. Best of luck.

Answer 10

I’ve been married six times, divorced six times and through the course of a years I’ll have spent time with all of them. Some of us do better as X’s.