I can't get over my soon to be ex-husband. I think maybe I entered the relationship in a rebound type of situation because my husband is really selfish at times, and immature, and hard to get along with at times, but our passion is like hot fire and he TOTALLY satisfies me sexually. My boyfriend is GREAT too, but not really in comparison to my soon to be ex.......but my boyfriend is a close number 2.
My boyfriend is trying so hard....and he's sweet, loving, affectionate, and all of that but I can't get my ex out of my mind. It doesn't help that lateley my boyfriend has been SUPER insecure and asking "comparison" questions about him and my ex. Ofcourse I lie because I don't want him to feel bad......but he is turning me off with the insecurity and when he brings my ex up he only REMINDS me of how amazing our passion was ALL the time, instead of how it is with the boyfriend....just SOME of the time. The relationship with the ex was dysfunctional, but I loved him. How can I forget him?
2006-10-06 12:29:48 · 15 answers · asked by lilac b 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When I was going through my divorce my attorney told take the number of years you were together and divide it by 2 and that's how long it takes to be totally and emotionally over your ex. It works for guys I don't know about women. Some women are over it within months some never. Unfortunately your boyfriend needs to realize he is a rebound boyfriend. I think you jumped into a serious relationship too fast. I would try putting the breaks on your current relationship and date other people. Your setting your current boyfriend up some serious heartache. I know because I was in the same situation and hurt someone who didn't deserve it.
2006-10-06 13:20:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Girl, let me tell you, all of my really good relationships have been disfunctional. It keeps us interested & it gives us something to bitc# about. When it's all peaches & cream it almost sickening sweet. We as women need alittle disfunction, atleast I do, cause if the man doesn't shake things up a bit then I do, and I'd rather be the one that's able to bitc# about him screwin up then actually be the one screwin up. You feel me? I don't know sounds to me like maybe you better hold on for those divorce papers to be finalized sounds like you still have some unresolved feelings to look at. Does your ex feel the same? Maybe you should find out. Good luck & your right there is nothing worse then an insecure man ask some dumb as$ questions, serves him right. Do what you gotta do cause true love doesn't come around often.
2006-10-06 21:04:19 · answer #2 · answered by Liza M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's not insecurity but intuition. Have you ever thought that maybe he senses that you still have feelings for your ex. What I don't understand is why there is a problem. Do you think that your ex is going to change? If you are basing your happiness on sex with a man that you have already stated has "issues" than you don't deserve a man like your new boyfriend. Go ahead back to your ex and you will undoubtedly regret leaving what sounds to me to be a good man.
2006-10-06 20:41:36 · answer #3 · answered by juicie813 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are really wanting to forget the ex and really think this BF is worth the time then communicate your sexual needs to him. Tell him to stop asking about comparisons because you don't ask about other girls. Let him know how uncomfortable this makes you feel. Do not lie, just say it is different with him. Not better or worse, just different.
Tell your BF you don't really care to talk about your ex.
2006-10-06 20:08:48 · answer #4 · answered by lofolulu 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dysfunctional is the answer,everytime you think about your ex, say dysfunctional,i have a boyfriend now,well endowed,no compassion,only time passion is allowed is when i stop seeing him then he wants to be passionate,i have to beg for his attention,point is talk to your new boyfriend hopefully he will understand the insecurity problem,if not break aloose gently,now my ex boyfriend,is not well endowed,but the passion,the attention,the back massages,the great cooking,i get none of that from my new boyfriend,now my new boyfriend claims he loves me,and i do love him.i can only suggest that you just be easy with your new boyfriend,try not to hurt his feeling,s girl it will come back to haunt you,i been there
2006-10-06 20:06:12 · answer #5 · answered by pamela j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have a huge problem here and why is your current boyfriend so interested in your x here?? most men-- dont care niothing about this in new relationships, and we have a bulit in mechanisimm, too not ask stupid questions such as this is the cse herre.comparing yourself to another man, it makes no sense and you runing around lying on top off itt. your only making, materrs worse why dont yousay look, whts the diference your not him-- quitt asking me this bul, iam trying too get over him. okay boyfriend is a nuber two but hes using your ex as l, leverage, too find his, place in your relationshipp, we think he has a inferriorr complexx. if you cant forget your ex and thisother so caleed endowed, boyriend, has too go you seriously must decide if you would be , better off with ex--- hons. and you stil love him- go too him, talk too him you got nothing to lose here!!
2006-10-06 19:39:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell your bf that you and he are in a relationship now. You don't want to talk about the ex any more. Tell him that you and he are together and that you chose him. Remind yourself of the dysfunctional parts to get over your ex.
2006-10-06 19:35:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anna F 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
my mind is blown....you sound as though you are writting sceens for a soap opera in all reality. your in love with this , you are with that one. i am sorry but i don't think i could ever trust you if i were anywhere near being a person in your life! you would be the perfect one to have an open relationship with! maybe that is more of a life style for you?
2006-10-06 19:34:20 · answer #8 · answered by ~just_jd~ 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Uh oh. I don't know but it sounds like you need to give it another try with your ex.
2006-10-06 20:08:28 · answer #9 · answered by jenlovely01 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice to you is ... start drinking heavily. You got yourself a real mess. But, It's not all about sex. Believe me, I learned the hard way.
2006-10-06 20:20:24 · answer #10 · answered by nicksriders 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋