I just came out to my mom, and she took it surprisingly well. I'm bisexual, so it's not THAT huge of a deal, but I'm still a bit freaked out. I plan on coming out to my school on October 11th (National Coming Out Day), and I'm even more scared because my school discriminates against a lot of minorities. I hear people say "that's gay", or call people fags all the time. I'm afraid that coming out would ruin a few friendships and make me into an outcast, but I hate hiding that part of me, because I'm a really open person. What should I do? (I'm planning on wearing a shirt with the rainbow flag on it and answering whatever questions come.)
2006-10-06 11:32:50 · 21 answers · asked by Israely Jew 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I was afraid of losing a few friendships but...
after about 18 months of coming out to my friends, I still have ALL of them...
only a religious one, who is a discalced carmelite nun, tries to "convert" me... but has not discarded me yet...
2006-10-06 11:58:26 · answer #1 · answered by Ces 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you and good luck. I say that's gay sometimes (meaning that's stupid). I would never intentionally say it in front of a gay person and it doesn't mean I have a problem with gay people. I don't. This sounds a bit like I'm lecturing you but I don't mean it that way. I just mean not everybody who says that is saying anything about gay people. Maybe it won't be quite as bad as you think. It seems like you've made up your mind to do this and I wish you well. It will be hard but you can get through it. I'm not sure where you live but check around to see if there's some kind of group for gay youth you can join. Even there's nothing in your town I'm sure there's lots on the internet. It might help to have something like that if you have trouble with your current friends. And you can get advice from people who have been through this same thing.
2006-10-06 18:44:00 · answer #2 · answered by Peri 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who you are is not political; it does not have to have a special day for itself. When you start kissing other girls in front of people, they'll know. They probably already do. At school, you invite a bunch of crap when you bring attention to yourself with a bullhorn. If you run around announcing it, you'll get a lot of attention--both from the gay-friendlies and the jerks. The question is, do you want to be real or are you doing it just to make a scene and a political statement? You get what you ask for....
p.s.
I say, "that's gay" and call people fags and I'm a short haired lesbo.
2006-10-06 18:45:25 · answer #3 · answered by Gremlin 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good job. I've always said, if I could tell my parents, that would be the hard part. If they knew, I wave a gay pride flag in front of all my friends. If they rejected me, that is their problem. I'm still the same person they first started being friends with, Now they just know that I like the same sex too. I wouldn't stop being someones friend just because they like a certain thing. Why would I care who they wanted to be with?
2006-10-06 18:43:12 · answer #4 · answered by Liir 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I recommend that you tell your friends and if anyone has any questions then you can answer them. If you try to make a huge statement then there is a chance that people are going to think that you are trying to get attention rather than proclaim how you feel inside. Also understand that when you grow it is natural for people to criticize but something will have to give either it will be you or their attitudes. If you stay true to yourself then after time people will accept who you are.
2006-10-06 18:46:40 · answer #5 · answered by Rod is the coolest guy I know 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your choice to come out is honorable and if your ready and sure that you want the whole school to know then let your rainbow shine. and if your friends leave, then their not really your friends because friends support you no matter what. I went through the same things you are gonna go through. If you need more advice or wanna talk e-mail @ surfstud@sbcglobal.net
2006-10-06 18:59:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you!
I'm totally come out to my family and friends. Actually they r not that surprized when hearing this. If one of your friends discriminates you after you come out. He or she don't worth you to be a real friend to them. I consider ppl good from their personality but not who they sleep with. I believe you too right? so if any of your friend who say any mean thing to you just break up with him/her. Be confidence and try to vioce up! I am a totally gay not a bi. I always voice up to anyone who want to against me. Don't think that bi will be better than gay, try to be confidence. The reason you being a gay is you can feel sth frim the same gender right, so you suppose to like it.
I support you!
2006-10-06 20:45:48 · answer #7 · answered by Zac 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Good for you!!!! be proud of who you are, all of you! And yes you may loose some "friends" along the way, but maybe they really weren't your FRIENDS after all. It took me 34 years to come out, and yes, I lost a lot, but I gained much more. ME. Never be ashamed of who or what you are, your sexuality is only a small part of the whole package. Once again GOOD LUCK!
2006-10-06 18:37:04 · answer #8 · answered by )o( 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sadly, I don't think that girls get ridiculed as much as guys. I don't think ANYONE should get ridiculed for who they are but it is just sad that guys think it is sexy when girls are bi or lesbian but they hate "fags"
Good Luck and give yourself a pat on the back for coming out and not being ashamed of who you are. I have experimented a lot so I guess I'm bi too? lol
2006-10-06 18:36:39 · answer #9 · answered by Amaya 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Gay, straight, or bi, your sexual orientation is none of their business! Are you looking for attention? Because you're sure gonna get it! Keep your mouth shut, and concentrate on school work and graduation! What if you are just "bi-curious?" Coming out will not be something you can take back or undo later, if you change your mind!
2006-10-06 20:28:29 · answer #10 · answered by rebecca_sld 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋