anger management?

Question

my husband went to anger management before i met him and he was such a nice guy then. we have now been married for almost a year and the last six months i have seen why he had to go in the first place. i can't stand him like this and so i called his supervisior ad am having him make my husband go back to anger managment classes. do you think it will work this time for good or is he always going to have to go? he is such a different person now.

we got married one month after we met so we have only know each other about a year

he is also in the military and got sent the first time for getting in a fight for no reason and breaking the guys arm

Answer 1

What they do in anger management is teach people who have issues with anger, how to cope with their tempers. If they don't learn and practice those skills, they are going to be doing the same angry responses as they had before. Sometimes it takes people a really long time to learn new things and some people are never able to learn. It's much easier to just let yourself go and be angry. Besides that, there is always a payoff (there is for anything we do in life) such as attention, getting your own way, feeling relief from pressure or stress, making everyone upset.
It would be up to you - do you believe that your husband will learn or will he want to learn ways to stop his temper? Or will he let his temper go and cause trouble whereever he goes? I wouldn't want to live with an angry person all the time or one that has a bad temper.
You can also get counseling for yourself. Like people who are co-dependent and react to alcoholic's behavior - you might be doing the exact same thing and "allowing" him to treat you badly. It's a complicated issue that isn't easy to answer - that's why counseling for you might be helpful.
Very best of luck to you!

Answer 2

I don't believe that someone should learn to suppress their anger because that is only masking the real problem. There must be a reason he has this anger inside of him and it could be something that happened during his childhood. He needs to speak to someone about what is bothering him and deal with that issue. I truly believe that anger management classes are a temporary fix, like a drug. How can we tell someone not to be angry for whatever it was they went through, but wouldn't it be better to get treatment for the problem? Maybe a psychologist can help. That's just my opinion.

Answer 3

Maybe he needs more personal approach then the "standard" anger management courses.
He should consider counseling to learn how to handle it better. A psychologist or other licensed mental health professional can work with him in developing a range of techniques for changing your thinking and your behavior.

When you talk to a prospective therapist, tell her or him that he have problems with anger that he want to work on, and ask about his or her approach to anger management. Make sure this isn't only a course of action designed to "put you in touch with your feelings and express them"—that may be precisely what your problem is. With counseling, psychologists say, a highly angry person can move closer to a middle range of anger in about 8 to 10 weeks, depending on the circumstances and the techniques used. Refresher course might be needed from time to time.

Answer 4

i have been yo anger managment twice and parenting classes 1.
the reason i went to anger managment the first time is because i got into a fight and arrested
the 2 was because i got a divorce(we both had to take it)
along with the parenting classes.

the thing about these classes is they are a joke.it is a way for someone to make some money.sure there are helpful things to learn in the class.

my honest opinion is that it is really up to the person to change the way that they act.these classes do not help.sorry to say that to u.but it is ur husband that needs to change himself from the inside.

hope that helps

Answer 5

Anger is a emotional express. To stop it by thinking of why and what for then it may turn down next time anger. Eating too much hot and blood sugar too much also can make people lose of temper. Beer can help a short time. Clean water help a lot.

Answer 6

personally I think that it will always be a problem and that he might have to go back to anger managment classes again and again and again but he's also your husband and I feel that you should be there next to him in his time of need but if it gets really serious and he is taking his anger out on you,you should first try to get him help but if that doesnt work you may have to leave even though it may be hard if he cared about you he wouldnt take his anger out on you

Answer 7

Your husband is not going to change at least not alot because for six monthes you have let him get away with his attitude it is just like raising a child if you let them do something you don't like for a long period of time they know that you are ok with that. Leave the poor man and find someone how won't hurt you.

Answer 8

It will only work if HE wants it to work. Just like a person that drinks too much. They are the ones that have to want to quit. You cant force him to. If he goes only for you, he can go till the cows come home but he will never change. Tell him that you want marital counceling. Give him an ultimatum for that. Otherwise, your marriage, Im sorry to say, is doomed. Best of luck to you. You are gonna need it.

Answer 9

I think it will. If it worked well the first time and lasted a long time then try it again.

Answer 10

It sounds like he is one who will have to go back for a refresher course every 6 months. I hope he isn't too angry about you calling his boss.