inhibitions?

Question

how do i get over my sexual inhibitions? i think of fun new things i want to do, i'll even tell my husband about them, or I'll say he gets to choose, but i always wind up feeling embarrassed or too shy to actually do it. he's supportive, and we've been together over 5 years, i was just brought to think all types of sex are dirty. it's really hard to get that out of my head...... help!

Answer 1

I understand. Just remember, even the Bible says that the marriage bed is undefiled. Nothing between you and your husband is dirty. Since he's so supportive of you, you're lucky. Make it all fun. There are actually board games for couples, card games, dice, etc., designed to make things adventurous and new. There are adult stores that carry it and you can get the stuff online. Just remember, he's your husband and he loves you, and he wants you sexually....so have fun, play and go for it! :)

Answer 2

I think you should take things slow. Start small maybe play a game where you get to be in charge. Where you tell him what to do during sex, like telling him to kiss you in places where it feels good or vice versa, and work up to the fun things that you want to do as you feel more comfortable. There is nothing better than sex with someone you love and who loves you. That is when you should be able to let go and have fun, sex should never feel dirty and I feel bad that your parents weren't open about sex and how wonderfull it is when you are married and love someone.

Answer 3

The hardest thing to do with your partner is un do all that was taught to you about right and wrong as you were a child.
Your a woman now and you are married and sex is very important to a marrage and yes, sex is strange and different and every one get turned on differently.
And you have to be mature enough to express your sexual desires and live your partners sexual desires, Read books watch movies and live your sexual desires and dreams, it is all very healthy.
experiment as a couple and you will find what works best for the both of you. you'll find when it comes to sex virtually noth is normal and people will try about anything.
so be all you can be sexually with out remorse or guilt
you a woman now and your in love and sex is the ultimate expression of love.

Answer 4

You talk about it with each other openly.
You think of things to do as well as him.
There should be no shame or humiliation in sex after 5 years of marriage. Whose going to see you? Or hear you? Forget the old Victorian attitudes and go for broke. It's not hard to get out of your head. You just won't let it go. This is by your own volition...not your past upbringing.
Do it. Your husband will love you all the more for it.

Answer 5

I was brought up that way too. Just remember he's your husband whatever you do in the bedroom is ok, by God and everybody. Plus all those people who condemned the act were usually
1) repressed
2)trying to keep kids from doing it
3) hiding the fact that they love it themselves and don't want to be known as "wanton". It was women who carried on that compressing crap because the men in their lives wanted to make sure they wouldn't stray and they just took it to the max.
I don't know what to tell you except, just do it. You'll get over it after a while.

Answer 6

honey you're married, there is no kind of sex that's dirty. It's dirty if you're cheating, but with your husband it's natural....sex is incredible and amazing and a great way for the two of you to get closer and have fun and unwind.....enjoy him, you'll be a much happier, much more relaxed person for it.

Sex is great! Stop worrying about it and just do whatever it is you want to try. Have a blast!

Answer 7

I think having some self-confidence is key. Don't ever say or do anything that "tears you down". Don't say to yourself, "ah, my butt is big" or "he's not attracted to me" or "i look ugly when we are having sex" or anything like that. Constantly tell yourself (and have your husband tell you, too!) that you are attractive, fun, and develop some confidence. Then, you can tackle the "is this right or wrong" issue. You will have to come to a place where you can make peace with that, or you won't ever be happy!

Answer 8

Take it in small baby steps. Don't try to do it all at once. My wife was brought the same way as you say you were. it took me a very long year of patience to have her really enjoy it and then she used her imagination and we had a very happy sex life.

Answer 9

anything that you do with your husband that isn't harmful or abusive is good! It is great that your mind is imagining these things. And, so what if you get a little embarrassed! Make that part of the fun.

Answer 10

try something to help.. alchohol, weed, etc.. to get you past the hang ups. If you are not that experamental of person, try some counsiling, or sexual therapy.