Hello everyone :)
I know it is long, but please read it
I've known my best friend for more than 5 years till now
The problem is that i share my secrets with him since ever, but he only speaks about school and "some" of what happened in his week.
He says im his best friend and he is proud of it. but i sometimes feel he is lying. because he never talked with me as I do with him (sharing deeeeep secrets). when i ask him 2 tell me whats up.. he never tells me whats going on.
i tried 2 b frank with him and said I SHOULD KNOW. he said: "I will not tell u, because i dont want 2 tell u".
This id driving me crazy. I'm trying to speak with him about any subject but he dont help me. while if he was speaking with some1 else, he will be a radio.
Last thing: I mostly go 2 where he want us 2 go 2. but when i ask him 2 come to where I choose, he says that my place is boring..
After all of this he says: "Beleive me, u r my best friend"
Any suggestion or useful comments?
2006-10-06 10:24:35 · 13 answers · asked by J J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
actually i know him for more than 9 years
2006-10-06 10:32:58 · update #1
You may indeed be his best friend. His friendship with you is much more superficial than your friendship with him. Try to think of it as two separate things. Maybe he's simply that way - he doesn't share his deepest secrets, and he's really not bothered about going where you want to go. He seems to just skim the surface of what true friendship is all about.
Since you've known him for 5 years, you know this is the way he is. I would suggest taking a step back from him, and stop telling him all your secrets, etc. If you don't want to go where he wants to go, then simply don't go, and do your own thing.
You need to find a friend who wants a friendship on the same level as you, such a friend will trade off with you on secrets and on going places.
It doesn't make you right or wrong, nor your friend of 5 years right or wrong - it just means that you define "best friend" in a different way. Make sense?
2006-10-06 10:29:55 · answer #1 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because he is ur best friend doesnt mean he has to do everything u like. The places that he goes to, do u like going there. If u dont then tell him. As for sharing feelings, he may share with u eventually, u dont have to bug him or nag him like a possessive wife!!! U are able to share ur secrets with him. Shows how much u trust him......reflects the character and personality of the guy. May be he doesnt feel the same way u do. u always sway with his demands. This seems rather weak and probably that is why he doesnt choose to share his secrets. From all u said, u seem rather needy. So he might feel that he is expected to take care of u. My advice is to get a little self confidence.
2006-10-06 17:33:27 · answer #2 · answered by WORLD CLASS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might be someone who doesn't open up very easily, just because you don't have a hard time sharing your feelings don't mean that he don't want to, he might not have too much to say right now, you may need to give him time to open up to you and If you don't think it is fair that he don't want to do what you want then the next time he says something he wants to do decline and see how it goes, if you are really best friends you will be fair to each other and don't worry not every best friend will agree with everything because we are all different and that is what makes us human. The ability to deal with people of all walks is a good quality in people and if it don't work out you sound like a caring individual so have fun and find other friends.
2006-10-06 17:34:15 · answer #3 · answered by T agent 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't seem like a "best"friend. Don't cut him totally off, but take a stand for yourself. If he wants u to go someplace u don't really want to go, tell him and don't go. Stop being a push-over. Still, he may not be as open as you are so seing that it's a 5 years friendship, just work with it.
2006-10-06 17:34:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look the fact that he is your friend doesn't mean that he is going to tell you all his secrets and besides you guys just meet 5 years ago. I have a friendship with one of my friends for 11 years and i have not tell her all my deep secrets!!
2006-10-06 17:28:06 · answer #5 · answered by pink princess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun its really not a big deal ,find another friend that will listen to you going on and on about nothing, hes just the type thats quite, it does not mean hes not your best friend, if you need advice heck ill listen to yah
2006-10-06 17:28:44 · answer #6 · answered by rpoker 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to and has succeeded in controlling you. He does feel you are his best friend, but he wants or needs to control.
2006-10-06 17:27:36 · answer #7 · answered by Decoy Duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a new male best friend
2006-10-06 17:26:53 · answer #8 · answered by Diamond in the Rough 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he maybe hiding something...is he young with parents and maybe he is being abused?? hes not opening up...this is rough..if he has a minister he should talk to someone...
ask him if he has ever loved anyone Try that...
2006-10-06 17:28:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my answer is longer than expected so email me and i'll tell you then
lovinsurf1993@yahoo.com
if you want to know cuz my bff is the same way
2006-10-06 17:27:57 · answer #10 · answered by sweet_heart 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋