why dont he desire me?

Question

He dont even look my way when it comes to sex it has been so long I feel its about to end Im hurting and wanting to be close to him when i ask he says he loves me if so why dont he want to make love to me dont guys dream of a sexually active woman..

Answer 1

I think that you are describing a conditions known as Inhibited sexual desire (ISD). The person with ISD fails to initiate or respond to their partner's desire for sexual activity.
Sometimes, rather than being inhibited, there may simply be a discrepancy in sexual interest levels between two partners, both of whom have interest levels within the normal range.
Occasionally, someone may claim that his or her partner has ISD, when in fact they, them self, have hyperactive sexual desire and are very demanding sexually.

But based what you said that he is completely disinterested in sex it is not the case that you are too demanding.

ISD is a very common sexual disorder. The most common cause of ISD seems to be relationship problems wherein one partner does not feel emotionally intimate or close to their mate.
Communication problems, health problems such as depression, insomnia, excessive stress.
Treatment is required by the professional therapist and it depends on the eliminating causes listed above.

Answer 2

Men sometimes need to go the cave (see Men Are from Mars and Women are from Venus - not exactly literally, but remember that guys have 'family jewels' and it makes them a glorious combination of confused, sexually tormented and feeling 'too small' along with everything else they are trying to figure out in life. If you have done a few very special evenings of special attention to his likes in erotic dress or scenarios and he's still not interested, he may have a lowered sex drive and you may have to decide if what you want is a sex machine or someone who loves you and isn't afraid to say so. If he isn't meeting your sexual drive and YOU love him more than wanting to have an abundance of sex, maybe try masturbating. If it is the hugs and closeness you want rather than a sexual performance, let him know that's what has left you feeling empty.

Answer 3

Maybe his problem isn't you, maybe its him. Men can't talk about a thing like that, without their "stud" image getting into jeopardy if some one was the find out. All men, at one point or another go threw a time, that hinders their intimate side. It could be stress, hormones, drinking to much, and the list goes on and on. Try and be understanding and maybe eventually he will talk to you about "what" is really bothering him. Try not to complicate the problem by harping on him to much. Be supportive and understanding! This should pass in time. I know what you are feeling, and I also know the rejection is hard on you.If it is a personal problem he is dealing with in his life, rest assure its not a reflection on you. All couples go threw a dry spell, and generally after they get past that, its back to the "honeymoon stage"! And then he want be able to get enough. :)

Answer 4

because...he is getting it from somewhere else...and just because he says he loves you doesnt mean he's in love with you....whats wrong with you, can't you read between the lines i think that you should consider...looking else where and for someone who will appreciate you for you.

Answer 5

I think the giuys fantacize about a sexually actiive woman...something wrong with your guy hon.......

Answer 6

He might be getting some somewhere else. If you have reasons to think he is cheating he probably is.

Answer 7

either he is married,,too shy,,or doesn't know that condoms exist

Answer 8

More details, please, about your relationship...