I just had baby #2 (15 months after baby #1), less than 3 wks ago, both by c-section. My husband and I have always had a good relationship for the most part, we have spats here and there. Since I've come home from the hospital we've been arguing a lot about how I feel he doesn't help me at all. He begs to differ. I feel as if we've become very different and we just dont seem to be getting along, and just doesn't understand me. I also work, but am on maternity leave and feel a lot of pressure on my shoulders. All I can think about is when I go back to work, if I should drop the bomb that I want him to leave, or if someone else would have treated me better or different. He's never hit me or cheated on me or lied to me that I am aware of. I'm having a lot of negative feelings toward my marriage...is this hormones?
2006-10-06 05:48:38 · 14 answers · asked by mom of 2 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like you might be having a little postpartum depression, talk to you doctor. They can prescribe "happy pills" for you. Just remember that having baby #2 is an overwhelming time in your life and no matter how much the hubby may help the woman will be overwhelmed after having a baby. Don't be afraid to ask friends and family to help. And seriously talk to your doctor.
2006-10-06 05:53:33 · answer #1 · answered by iamjuls 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like it all is about your hormones. Right now your body is recovering and that may leave you more vulnerable to depression. You should try very hard to suppress any feelings of what could have been and concentrate on what can be. Your marriage is not over. The lack of sleep and additional pressure a second baby can bring to a relationship is difficult for both of you. Your right to feel he needs to pull his weight. You didn't get pregnant by yourself and deep down he knows he's slacking. Find a counselor to help both of you work through this tough time. Your kids need mom and dad to love each other first and foremost. My thoughts are with you. Good luck.
2006-10-06 13:01:12 · answer #2 · answered by l8bucko 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it might be hormones...but I would sit down and make a list of everything you do and things that he does. Raising two kids is hard work, I know. Yes, you do have some responsibilities around the house--but so does he! Lots of men think they can just bring home a paycheck and that's their share. Try not to nag him, but point out some things that you could really use some help with...maybe even stuff the two of you could do together. Hope everything works out. Good Luck! : )
2006-10-06 12:53:34 · answer #3 · answered by ANGEL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is your hormones. Sit down and talk with your husband. Tell him everything, about how you feel. Its hard having children. Maybe, he just doesnt know how to help. But if you tell him how you feel (weight on your shoulders) I'll bet he will be more understanding. Honey, he is only a man. He doesnt know any better. It will work out. In a few months everything will be fine. Hang in there.
2006-10-06 12:55:05 · answer #4 · answered by Kathy S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The whole family is going thru a change, whenever there is change alot of stress is introduced, he feels the pressure of another mouth to feed, you are still recovering from a birth. My wife sometimes gets overwhelmed and needs more help around the house (Ican get lazy at times). When she approaches me about it in calm way, I see her point and come around. When she does it in confrontational way (Im sure its because shes just worn out), a fight happens. Try having a talk with him from the standpoint of asking for help, not complaining. Works at our house. Good luck
2006-10-06 12:55:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! He sounds like a nice guy. The grass is not allways greener across the fence! Good luck
2006-10-06 12:52:01 · answer #6 · answered by padidvr2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say you are going thru post-partum depression, and it has nothing to do with you two's marriage, at all, Hormones, yes. Seek your doctor's help on this, cause sometimes it doesnt go away on its own.
2006-10-06 12:52:52 · answer #7 · answered by foxxy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it could be-- remember that having a baby makes you go thru a lot of changes - and it is also stressfull - try to make time for you and your husband to go to dinner and talk about how you both feel -hope that helps
2006-10-06 12:52:42 · answer #8 · answered by gabby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could very well be post partum depression,if you guys never had problems before,I would give it some time talk to your Doctor and see if they can give you any advice.
2006-10-06 15:18:17 · answer #9 · answered by snoop_dougie_doug04 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't make any hasty decisions right now. Give yourself some time to recuperate.
2006-10-06 13:00:33 · answer #10 · answered by jujub 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋