how do they deal with adult relationships, especially sexual relationships, if they've never gotten any kind of therapy???
2006-10-06 03:12:22 · 10 answers · asked by goddess1 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
this person is NOT me. it is someone i had a relatioship with.
2006-10-06 03:19:57 · update #1
i'm wondering if this can explain how a person would act out b/c of his past.
2006-10-06 03:21:15 · update #2
what that person needs is definittely therapy. such experience is not as insignificant so as to deal with it by himself. it is something important and traumatizing that can only be solved with therapy. if he doesnt go to a therapist then he will just repress his feelings even more and this will affect every aspect of his life, from relationship and commitment issues to anything else. the more time he leaves this unsolved, the more complicatted the situation will be. tell him to deal with it as soon as possible. this wont be fixed by itself. support him and try ttto convince him..
2006-10-06 03:29:13 · answer #1 · answered by Joey G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They need someone who's completely understanding and willing to work with them. Adult relationships, especially sexual relationships, can be difficult, even become self destructive if this person doesn't get help for themselves as well. I'm not saying that on the first date they should tell this person what happened to them, but I do feel that when someone with a past should inform their date if it looks like the relationship just might go further than one or two dates.
2006-10-06 10:22:29 · answer #2 · answered by Mommy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends upon where the person is in their recovery, but most people do only understand after getting professional help. There may be recurring issues with martyring, histrionic episodes or massochism. They may magnetize and tolerate painful relationships, often with people who cause the pain most familiar to them. For many people there is also guilt, and sometimes also promiscuity, but in the case of people with abandonment issues, they become genuinely upset when people they've engaged in a promiscuous fling with withhold attention ar affection afterward, so they may not be very popular. It hurts, so counseling is at least a start.
2006-10-06 10:27:46 · answer #3 · answered by Em 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would recommend that the "other" seek help, or ask a question him/herself. In answer to your question, acting out as you put it is the natural result of a conflict within a persons MIND that interferes with the present, overlaying it with the past... which for the MIND has to be kept in tact, and is thus replayed each time the person is stimulated sexually. This loop remains in place until it is eliminated by competent therapy.... which is very hard to find.
Good luck to whomever, and
Peace
2006-10-06 10:32:18 · answer #4 · answered by docjp 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well the best way is if the relationship is serious ur frnd should talk to their partner about everything so they can make it easier for him/her. also they should stay away from casual relationships that would just highlight the abandondment issue. i have a prob with the abandondment issue myself. i never got therapy but learned from experiences. i was very very clingy. i still am slightly
clingy but try to keep it under control. ppl who were abandoned , i find, fall in love too easely. ur frnd needs to control that to be able to take control of the relationship. also it really helps to have distractions. hobbies, friends and pets are a great. all ur frnd can do really is try to build up self confidence and realise they are happy with themselves and dont need others approval and attention to be happy. good luck to them
2006-10-06 10:27:36 · answer #5 · answered by Belosnezhka (aka Gex) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for this person they need to get some kind of help and counseling. sometimes just talking with friends that he know and trust will sometimes help.
for the record i was also a sexual abuse victim and the most important thing is never leave it inside you need to get it out and deal with it. that the only way you will be able to go on
2006-10-06 10:37:41 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I agree that this fellow needs professional help. But not just psychiactric (spelling?), but spiritual, also, b/c it's not just the body & emotions that were abused, but his whole self...the whole person. When you find a therapist, also look for a spiritual director (usually found at a church...may be a pastor, or he/she should have contact info for one in the area).
2006-10-06 10:30:59 · answer #7 · answered by Turmoyl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They really need some professional help...those are big issues to deal with. & you need to be a friend, & nothing more...they are confused enough now...
2006-10-06 10:24:15 · answer #8 · answered by fairly smart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go get the therapy now
2006-10-06 10:19:45 · answer #9 · answered by FLOYD 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to be in therapy or it will be a complete mess.
2006-10-06 10:16:17 · answer #10 · answered by jaensor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋