I don't agree with Christmas.?

Question

but I don't know how to approach the subject with my nearest and dearest who DO agree with it. The reasons are that it is a Christian festival and in my humble opinion should be there for Christians to celebrate the life of Jesus Christ. Not for kids to EXPECT presents by the bucket full. Also, I hate the way that companies promote items as 'Must have' for Cristmas. Pressuring parents into buying them for their kids. Many people get into debt so they can have a 'Good christmas' What about the rest of the year when you can't afford to do anything family orientated because you are paying off the debt of last Christmas?
But I digress, my question to you good people is... How do I explain my feelings to my nearest and dearest WITHOUT sounding like I think they are mugs for falling for the 'Great Christmas Con'?
Chrismas is about Jesus Christ ( should you believe in him) NOT about spending loads of money to show how much you love someone. There are many ways to show your love.

Spending lots of money on people does not prove your love, being there in times of trouble does!

Survival... I spend time with my loved ones every week and I get them little presents and do things for them the whole year round. I am NOT a miser. I disagree with what Chrismas has come to mean for many people. That is all.

I am not religious, I do believe there is a God but I don't agree with having to follow a religion.

wreck beach. I like where I live very much. If we all had to move to another country every time we disagreed with something within the place we live, then every one in the world would be a Nomad. What a silly suggestion!

chereeboy... I haven't accepted presents or cards for many years. I give to charity ALL year round.I have NEVER done Easter.

powerpuff... You don't know me. I am NOT tight.

Lover.... I don't mind in the least how other people run their lives, as long as they are not hurting me or my own. I am not looking to change everyones view of Chrismas, just wanting advice on how to explain my views in a gentle unoffensive way.

Thanks to all who have answered so far... if my question had been "What is your opinion of Christmas?" or "What is your opinion of MY opinion of Christmas?" then I would have to say I got a lot of great answers!
However, my question was " How do I explain my feelings about Christmas to my nearest and dearest without offending them?"
So only about 5 answers were relevent!

Answer 1

I like the way that you wrote it to us. I fully agree with your sentiments on what has happened to Christian holidays.

Whose fault do you think it could be that people today worship material goods on Christian holy days rahter than Christ?!

It sounds like you are close with your family, and love and care about them very much, and I think that they will respect your feelings on the subject. If you have small children, however, I don't think that they would understand - they are just excited about Santa at that age, and not Christ. If your family are older, just explain to them your thoughts and feelings, and tell them that you would appreciate them helping you out with this.

Good luck and God Bless!

Answer 2

I agree Christmas has become very commercial and if you are against presents then put your money where your mouth is and tell people you wont be accepting presents that you want to celebrate the holiday in the spirit it was meant to celebrated, as a memorial to Jesus Christ.
Personally I love Christmas, it is a magical time of the year when people dig deep for charities and a time we can let our loved ones know how much we appreciate them. Not in a commercial way either. I always make my kids outfits for Christmas and we make our own decorations, we spend time together craft and cooking. I am so sorry the grinch has bitten you and even though it isn't the holiday season yet I am going to send a prayer up for you, in the hope that you can catch some of the spirit. It doesn't have to have a label with a price on it to be special, it just has to be from the heart. I look forward to your next question at easter.

Answer 3

Well I would say that you don't need to spend much money - you could either make a present or find something that just doesn't cost a lot of money.

You don't have to explain to your relatives if you think that may upset them, but for example you could make them some Xmas biscuits or something (ok, maybe not the classic Xmas jumper!).

I agree that it is now a big consumer event, but then that's the society we live in now. However, if you don't like that then you shouldn't have to feel guilty at all for not having to buy people expensive gifts and presents. Adults earn their money, and if you have kids I guess they get some pocket money, so they can save up if there's something they really want - and that'll teach them about being good with money, especially if they spend all their hard-saved money on this years 'must-have' which is then thrown away after a few weeks.

As you say there are many ways to show your love which don't involve money, so pick one of those as your 'gift' instead!

Answer 4

My family are not religious, but we do celebrate Christmas. Maybe if kids were not brought up as spoilt brats, this would not be a problem. I can afford to give my kids pretty much what they want.................but I don't. I don't think it's a case of Christmas. It's the way you look at life. The best thing I got for Christmas last year was a beautiful card, from my partner.
Just explain to them that you won't be buying expensive gifts this year, because you don't agree with it. My family did this a long time ago, and Christmas is now a lovely day about spending time with each other(rather than spending money on each other)

Answer 5

As people we enjoy looking forward to events, and in the dim and distant past the middle of winter was an awfully cold and depressing time, so the good folk back then invented a way of cheering themselves up - they had a big party. When the Roman Emperors became Christian, they hi-jacked the pagan mid-winter celebration and linked it with the birth of Christ. It was - like so many things connected with religion - not meant to be literally true. But it was meant to cheer people up when there was little else to feel good about.
The present giving was introduced much later by the rich and famous who went round on the day after Christmas to give boxed gifts to their workers - hence, Boxing Day. As always, the rest of us copied what the rich did, so the present giving took hold.
All of these ideas were invented by people. We can't un-invent them. However, there have been many ideas in the past which have died out because people have chosen to ignore them. If you are just one of the first people to ignore certain aspects of Christmas, and others follow, who knows - maybe the traditions you despise will fade away too.
But don't hold your breath!

Answer 6

I think you have expressed your feelings very well here; explain to your family in the same way. Suggest that you don't want to give or to receive anything other than small tokens, but also assure your family that you want to share Christmas with them. You could suggest that some of the money that the family would normally spend on Christmas could be give to Charity. I agree with your views on the commercial aspect of Christmas & the pressure on parents of young children. As you say, this isn't what Christmas should be about, but it's very difficult to explain that to a small child. I hope you will enjoy the true spirit of Christmas as you wish to.

Answer 7

Christmas is a pagan festival (Yule) and can be celebrated by anyone of any religion as it is based on the passing of the year. The fact that it was hijacked by christians for their own purposes is a moot point.
but I digress
I had this discussion with my nearest and dearest a few years ago, when I was on a low wage and couldn't afford to go overboard with my numerous relations. It's better to talk about it - ideally face to face - and well before people start getting into the present buying mode. Whatever your reasons, I am sure that your family will respect your firmly held opinions, but it is only fair to warn them, before they start paying out for lavish presents for you.

Answer 8

I have to answer this question, but, it looks as if you may not get to my response.
First, I must disagree with you. My reason is, Christmas , to most, is not about agreement or disagreement! There are many reasons people love and hate this holiday and if you ask you will find a countless supply of reasons. When you celebrate this time of the year did it occur to you some may be doing it just because of the family memory? For some the holiday still holds that belief in which it stands, however, in the humans race to find themselves and some kind of faith or belief in something better, we look forward to something that can bring back or instill happy memories. Weather it be Christmas, or some other holiday we are always searching for something to bring us happiness. For some it is the exchange of gifts, bigger and better then everyone elses. But, for some it is the act of doing nothing but watching. I prefer them both! I'm not one for the exchanging, but I do love to give and watch. Yummy! For most of the year I have spent the majority of my energy on the everyday run arounds of life. Finding little or no time to give freely to the ones I love. Okay so we get a birthday celebration every now and again. But, most of the time It's a struggle just to keep life in line. At Christmas time we, ALL OF US, look forward to the down time of life and the up time of humanity.
Don't look at it as just a Celebration of CHrists birth but look at it as a celebration of the end of an old life and the awakening of a new one to come.
I am not a true believer, if there is such a thing, and if I had it my own way, I would never allow anyone to take this time away from a single soul.
Give to those who have nothing! Take from those who freely give! And, most of all invite the un-invited!
Gotta love the non-believers, because in their battle to find, they strengthen those who have already found.
Sit back, and enjoy the time you have to spend with your family! Diversity is the spice of life! You are there because you love not because your searching for it! Share in what is given and give back by sharing! Bring your belief into everything, and share the belief that brought you together. It will be your greatest charm!

Answer 9

You make a very good point. If you are concerned about your family providing some huge gift for your children just explaine to them and ask them to not provide the present for the child. perhaps help find a new tradition for them so that they do feel involved w/ your family @ christmas time. Perhaps getting together to sing carols or read a christmas story. And as far as not making your friends and family feel dumb, just explain that this is your belief, but allow them to celebrate there way as well. Expecially stress the feelings about celebrating Jesus. You probably will have some feel bad about this, but most of the time it is because they are seeing your point just choosing not to celebrate that way and perhaps are thinking maybe they should as well

Answer 10

You are VERY right in your opinion, which I happen to share! I have 3 kids and my husband and I only want to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas, but then other people throw it completely out of proportion when they buy the kids TOO many presents. We want to teach the kids what the true meaning around Christmas is and everyone else is just like sheep; every year it's the same thing, television ads, shopping malls. I think its all Crap and we shouldn't be teaching our kids the way of sheep but to have their own mind!!!! What do Jehovah's do? Stay inside for the season? I feel that I lie to my kids when I talk about santa, I think its wrong!!!