How do you get over thinking negatively of everyone?

Question

I avoid people because I tend to think everyone is boring and stupid. I avoid social situations because of this. I'm getting professional help, but would appreciate any other suggestions. I'm 35, this has been going on my whole life. Been trying to fix it with no luck. I hope that it is in my head and it is not true that everyone sucks. I can't seem to just force my brain not to think that way.

Is there any kind of group or program that can address this? It is sort of like social anxiety, except I don't really get nervous around people. I just don't like people to know that I think they are stupid and boring. Most people will not like you if you think they are stupid and boring. Help!!! I need a new brain. Or re-wiring in the least.

Oh by the way I am not very successful myself...when I was young I was considered to be pretty intelligent. But mainly because of these social problems and depression, I have failed miserably career-wise.

Answer 1

I have a relative like this. I wish he'd get professional help too....

I have no advice or suggestions other than to complete therapy.

Answer 2

Oh wow, I really feel bad for you because you were never really able to be who you could have been because of this disorder. I think that it is really just simple though you need to start over in your life and reinvent your personality. Let go of the idea that you are a box and the insides are in a set order. Think outside of it. It's not easy and I have had similar problems as you. I never really hate people but I was afraid of what they would think about me.. ( I was made fun of alot) So I got tough.. but I became a social recluse. Now I am much better I just had to stop drinking and find something to make me proud of myself and screw what people think of me while I do that. Put on a smile and take things in stride. I went back to college and I am now able to function completely. Maybe anti-anxiety medication might help too... Hope it helps but I understand its hard

Answer 3

It's called projection. The feelings about ourselves are being "projected" onto others. It's also called mirroring. What you feel about others is just as if you were looking into a mirror. So in other words you have inadequate feelings of self. You said it very succinctly in your last sentence, "failed miserably". You need to work on self-esteem and ignore your ego. Your ego is giving you false power. Ask the therapist to help you find out why you self-degrading, whether it be verbal or physical abuse from your childhood, whatever... you need to face the demons in order to let them go. Deep down you are a child of God, a beautiful soul that is worthy. You need to get through the blocks to love yourself again and the world will be a much prettier & safer place. God bless you.

Answer 4

It seems you are failing at your expressions. People do feel that way occassionally, except they feel the tug to look for what they would like in people. You don't have to think people are at your intelligence level to be friends or friendly to them. You often feel that just smiling at strangers when your walking along because in many occassions you will get a smile back. A positive attitude will take you farther than you can ever imagine. For example, when someone is presenting a proposal to a company, they are excited, smiling, and exuberant. Lastly, would you want to hang around someone that thinks and acts like your stupid and thinks that you suck?

Answer 5

.You have the biggest case of insecurity I have seen in a long time. If you can use thinking negatively of people you have justified in your mind reasons not to meet or associate with any one.So it is your insecurity you need to be working on not the negativity. Remember you are not the judge of any one but your self and you have found your self wanting. I am sure there are many good things about you, find them and build on them and get help for your self. You know all people are not as you think ,and the reason why I know that is because you found the courage to question your motives. Good on you

Answer 6

Since you're seeking prefessional help, I'm sure it's come up that your view of other people comes first from within you. The fact that your life is miserable, you would tend to view others as worse than you, because that would make you feel a little better about yourself. That you are 'better' than them. You have to love yourself first before you can love others. Stay with the therapy.

Answer 7

It may help to think positive about people. Yes, you can force your brain to do so. Look for good things to think and say about each person. Refuse to talk or think bad thoughts about them. Say the good things out loud because there truly is power in the spoken word. Doing these things will change the way you automatically react to people, over time.

Answer 8

You don't need a new Brain, You need a different environment.
Take a trip in the country and get involved with farm work or better still fruit picking in France or Down Under.
It's amazing the change of person when they come back from this change

Answer 9

You have to look at your own life first, maybe you had a bad childhood, the way I look at other people is God made them for a reason even if they are not as smart as you, you have to accept them an hope you can have a little love in your heart for the less fortunate, Peace out.

Answer 10

try to think about what your good at! could you do a job that you enjoy? i have ound the only wat for me is to work as an artist and musician. you dont get rich but life seems bearable now becaue art and music let me switch off and work at the same time. as for people, well some are just stupid and boring. find people who inspire you and dont be afraid of showing who you really are. people who are unpedictale and strong even mad get me going so i spend my time with them. be kind to yourself.dont let negitive thoughts hold you because were all a long time dead whats the worst that can happern.? well you can always email me [e-mail]